That Which Matters Most
by Drummerchick7
Summary: A continuation of Check and Mate, this story takes Samantha and Ashley through the events of Mass Effect 3. Title thanks to Raven Sinead. Cover art thanks to LannMelo. Second Installment of the Music and Mayhem series.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: Betad by the lovely Raven Sinead, as well as titled by her. All characters and settings belong to Bioware. I just love playing "what if."_

* * *

><p><strong>Ashley<strong>

There was nothing hotter to Ashley Williams than the sight she currently beheld. Samantha was poised on top of her, her fingers interlaced with Ashley's as the lieutenant-commander supported her. She rocked back and forth on top of Ashley's strap on, shuddering in ecstasy as a single drop of sweat that had beaded on her chest slowly traced its way down between her large, swinging breasts. If Ashley hadn't been in the zone, moving unconsciously with Sam in just that special way, then she would be utterly still, captivated by the sight. Occasionally her eyes stole down to the place where their bodies met, watching the clever device that was also buried inside of her disappearing into her girlfriend before briefly making rhythmic reappearances.

The intriguing thing about the toy she was using – indeed, it was the thing that made them purchase it two weeks before – was that, in addition to being buried inside of her, it pulsed and moved thanks to a lovely little computer program inside of it that responded to Sam. If she fucked Sam with it, it pulsed and vibrated to Sam's rhythm. If Sam touched it with her hands or mouth, it did the same. So every move, every gyration, every grinding motion, and any involuntary clamping of Sam's muscles sent amazing sensations dancing over Ashley's clit as well as sailing along inside of her.

Moments later, Sam's fingers tightened in Ashley's. She felt an accompanying intensity with the toy as Sam's inner muscles clamped down on it. Sam shuddered, barking out a cry of pleasure as she threw her head back.

Ashley felt the drop of sweat finally hit her stomach as her own muscles tightened in preparation for her orgasm. Her back arched, causing Samantha to rise into the air a little as waves of pure, raw pleasure washed over the lieutenant-commander.

It was several moments before she finally collapsed, a boneless communications specialist following suit.

No words were said. Ashley merely threw an arm around Sam and rested it there as they caught their breaths. Sweat gathered wherever their skin touched, but they didn't mind. In fact, it just made Ashley feel even more secure, as at the moment a snowstorm raged outside the single window of Samantha's tiny studio apartment. The fact that they could be so warm when outside it was so cold made the contented feeling of having the woman she loved in her arms even more… indescribable.

After a moment she tightened her grip on Sam, bodily lifting the woman off of her temporary member before rolling them to their sides. The smaller woman let out a whimper at the loss of fullness, but Ash quickly had them pressed together again, supplying a large amount of skin contact as a replacement.

"God, Ashley," Sam murmured, even the sound of her voice long and languid as she almost absently nuzzled her face back and forth into the cleft between Ashley's breast and shoulder. It was something she did rather often, especially in this delicious moment after sex, in order to get as much direct skin contact to her face, and to smell what she called Ashley's "glorious sex-smell".

Ashley grinned slowly. "That good, huh? Can't even finish what you were going to say?"

Sam didn't respond right away. Instead she pulled herself up to give Ashley a long, lingering kiss. As she did so, her hand slipped down to the toy still firmly embedded inside of the lieutenant. She gave it a few almost loving strokes, which only served to set all of Ashley's nerves on fire, leaving her undecided as to whether it hurt or felt _amazing_. Then she was removing the toy, gently freeing it from Ashley's center before tossing it carelessly to the end of the bed. She pulled back a little, a smile on her face that made it clear she was _entirely_ pleased with herself.

"Happy anniversary, darling," she mumbled. Ashley just smiled in response, reaching her arms up to engulf the smaller woman in a bear hug.

But Samantha didn't let her. She ducked out of Ashley's embrace, rolling onto her other side and reaching down over the side of the bed.

"Baby? What's going on?" Ashley asked, utterly confused. Was something wrong?

Sam didn't answer, instead righting herself. Pushing herself onto her knees, she shushed Ashley with a look before pushing her hair behind her ears.

That's when Ashley noticed the box, and her heart stopped even as Samantha smiled coyly and opened it.

"Jesus _fuck_, Samantha!"

It came out without Ashley quite being aware of it. It took a moment for her heart to speed back up. In that moment, Samantha had started speaking.

"My dear, foul-mouthed woman," she began, smirking a little. "One year ago today, you asked me all about my sordid past on a shuttle. You then saved me from the big, scary table, let me sing to you, and generally charmed my pants right off. And then my pants really _did_ come off, and somewhere along the line I realized I was falling rather fast and hard for this woman who was supposed to be a fling while I was home on leave. Then you saved me and my family, and ever since you have been an absolute _thorn_ in my _side_."

Ashley let out a snort of laughter despite her stunned, awed silence. She knew she was gaping like a fish, but she couldn't help it as Samantha grinned a little at her own joke.

Samantha schooled her features rather quickly, though, taking a deep breath before continuing. "I find that the thorn is comfortable, and I would rather miss it if I were to remove it. So I thought I'd propose that the thorn stay forever and ever, but now I think this metaphor has gotten away from me, so I'll just say it. Ashley Williams… will you marry me?"

Ashley didn't really know _what_ to say. They'd sort of talked about marriage, enough to know that they each wanted it in the future, but no solid plans had been made or anything. They'd been together for a few weeks at the beginning, followed by six months of only seeing each other once a month if they were _lucky_. The last six months or so, however, had been _amazing_, both of them stationed at Alliance HQ in Vancouver, where Sam worked on the retrofits for the dry-docked Normandy. Ashley was to be XO on the vessel when it was once-more space worthy, under the command of Admiral Anderson.

In fact, she had been dreading the coming weeks because the ship very nearly _was_ ready to fly. It meant that Ashley would have to leave Sam behind again. She would have to put herself in danger, risk her life and her body's capabilities in the line of duty. She had thought a time or two about proposing before then, but it was… extremely difficult to ask that of Sam. It was a common thing, she knew, for soldiers to be unable to ask that of their girlfriends or boyfriends. The lack of proposal, and the constant danger, had ruined more than one relationship.

But Sam knew that – they had talked about it – and was now knelt before her upon the bed, asking her anyway. She'd even gotten a ring – white gold with several small diamonds, the LC's birthstone – and was now holding it out, gazing into Ashley's eyes, completely hopeful and guileless. Her eyes held every emotion they'd spoken of – deep affection, lust, happiness, contentedness, safety and trust – and the answer was on Ashley's lips mere seconds after Sam had finished her little speech.

"Of course, doofus!" she laughed, pulling the communications specialist in for a kiss that was bruising in its intensity. But as intense as it was, it was short-lived, Sam pushing back and delicately placing the ring upon Ashley's finger.

"I know you can't wear it at work," she started, slipping the thing home, "but I sneaked a scan on my omnitool for size, so I wanted to see that it was, indeed…"

"A perfect fit," Ashley finished for her, smiling as she held it up to the faint light coming in through the window from the streetlight outside. It felt a little funny, because she wasn't used to having a ring on, but it fit like it was supposed to be there, nonetheless. "I don't care that I can't wear it at work, baby. I'm not at work right now."

"No, you're not," Sam sighed with a gleam in her eyes before shoving forward and tackling Ashley back to the bed. "You're right here with me, and I don't intend to waste a single second of it," she said as she began to stoke the coals in Ashley's loins into flames all over again.

Ashley was all too happy to oblige.


	2. Chapter 2

**Samantha**

Samantha was a jittery mess when she went in to work the next day. She didn't actually have an engagement ring – the downside of actually _doing_ the proposing – but she still felt like she was broadcasting her current marital status (_pre-marital status? Somehow that just sounds dirty…_) to the world. She was _incredibly_ pleased with herself, and generally with how her anniversary had gone, _despite_ not being able to get the day off, but she was now extraordinarily jumpy, expecting people to say something left and right, even if they had no way of knowing she was now well on her way to being made an honest woman – or, rather, making an honest woman out of herself.

Part of this was because of the endless string of practical jokes she and Joker had sprung on each other over the last several months. They had met six months before, on her first day stepping foot on the _Normandy_, and almost immediately started up a relationship not unlike brother and sister – specifically not unlike her relationship to her _own_ brothers. Which meant that mere weeks in to the retrofits, she had come to her station only to find a mysterious box sitting on her console. The moment she touched it, it had sprung open, a rubber snake flying into her face, startling her so badly she let out a shriek. The shriek was shortly followed by the pilot's mad cackle, and from that moment it was _war_.

She was currently in the lead, meaning she kept coming aboard the ship just _waiting_ for some trick to be sprung upon her. She would check her console thoroughly, the high ceiling of the CIC, the space beneath her console… nothing. She was beginning to think that there was no prank, and his goal was to simply drive her mad waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Despite her best efforts, it was working.

So today's jitteriness was partly due to Joker's antics, and partly due to what he might say or do if he could smell her engagement on her.

She got through the airlock just fine, however, silently coaching herself to keep it cool (_keep it cool keep it cool you totally look normal keep it cool_). Once past his seat and his pleasant, "Mornin', Sam," she almost giddily ran to her station, visually confirming the lack of any obvious traps or pranks before dropping her duffel bag in the Pile Of Nameless Shit that was in front of the new bulkhead leading to what used to be the armory and which was now the port side of the War Room.

Today was Friday, and she and Ashley would be spending the weekend with Ashley's mother. It was a last-minute idea. Well, no, "idea" was a misnomer. It was a last-minute _demand_ made my Ashley's mum when the LC had called her mother late the night before – midmorning in France where her mum was – to show her the engagement ring. Mrs. Williams had then informed them that the guest bedroom would be ready the next night, and she would be expecting them for dinner.

"The woman is like a no-nonsense version of _my_ mum," Samantha now mumbled, opening up her usual windows after inputting her security code. Her mail was the usual, with an updated task list, an ANN newsletter, various spam messages, and… porn. He actually embedded porn in her task list!

"Jesus H. Christ! Joker!"

Her only answer was the pilot's usual cackle up from the cockpit.

Narrowing her eyes, Sam hurriedly deleted the message, finding the original _actually_ sent by the requisitions office and opening it up. Fuming silently to herself about Joker's "joke", she almost missed the little ray of joy and sunshine the message held for her.

"Dammit. I _hate_ crawling through the ducts…"

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><p>Sam was in a black mood when she re-emerged from the ducts aft of the conference room. She had zapped herself four times, been prodded for whether she needed help or not by the (<em>at least astonishingly sexy-sounding<em>) EDI VI (_still dubious on the status of VI – I wouldn't put it past Joker to lie about that)_, and had had to ignore several calls from her mother, who knew she had planned on proposing the day before and clearly wanted to know all the details (Samantha had at least sent her a holo of the ring on Ashley's finger – she wasn't _completely_ heartless). The only saving grace was that every time she remembered that she had proposed, it put the biggest grin on her face.

"I really need a ring," she mumbled now as she remembered once more, putting the tools she had placed in her pockets back into their case. Ashley had said she would get Sam one, even doing a quick scan of the specialist's hand for sizing purposes. Sam had tried to let Ashley know her tastes, but the LC had simply smiled, shaken her head, and informed Sam that she had the perfect thing in mind. If that phrase had come from her brothers – or Joker – Sam might be scared, but she felt confident Ashley wouldn't get her a ring pop or something else totally awful for something as important as _this_.

Right?

_Oh shit, now I have no idea_-

Suddenly, the floor shifted, sending Samantha sprawling to the ground from her knelt position. "What the bloody hell-"

"All hands, report to stations," EDI's voice intoned. "Hostiles detected, lockdown overridden." A pause, then, "The _Normandy_ is engaging in evasive maneuvers. Brace yourselves."

_Well, it's hard to be more braced than flat on your stomach on the floor_, Samantha couldn't help but think to herself, before truly thinking about the situation. _Hostiles? On Earth? Shouldn't there have been some __**warning**__?_

Trying to push herself to her feet only resulted in her hitting the floor once more as the ship jolted to the side. Other than the ship's jerking, however, the room was silent. Only the sound of her heart and her ragged breathing was the soundtrack to her confusion and slowly growing terror.

After a minute she tried again, getting to her feet cautiously before stumbling to the conference table and catching herself on the edge. Giant cabling that had yet to be buried under the floors tried to trip her, but she managed to keep her feet. Working her way around the table, she aimed for the windows, hoping to get some clue as to what was going on. At the same time, she began talking to EDI.

"EDI, I know you're busy aiding Joker, but what on Earth is going on? Who's attacking us?"

Just as EDI answered, Sam braced herself on the window and looked up. Looming before her was an image worse than the nightmares of the Collector ship seen on Horizon that sometimes haunted her. "Giant" only _started_ to describe it. Blacker than any night she had ever experienced, it had tentacle appendages that reached down from the sky like a great hand ready to pluck her from the ground. Originating somewhere above – she couldn't make out the details – was a piercingly-bright, red light, like a great eye trying to ferret out all the smallest details below it.

As her heart sank into her gut and her body froze in absolute terror, her mind barely registered EDI's words.

"The Reapers are here, Specialist Traynor."


	3. Chapter 3

**Ashley**

"Anderson!" Ashley almost automatically settled into a salute. The admiral returned it before holding out the same hand. She took it, shaking with him for a moment. She was _just_ about to tell him her good news – honestly, she felt like a fucking schoolgirl, but she couldn't deny that being engaged to Samantha make her feel giddy as _fuck_ – when she caught just who the people he had been speaking with were.

"Shepard?"

"Ashley?"

Before she could respond – with _what_ she didn't know – Anderson asked her, "Lieutenant-Commander, how did it go in there?"

_Right. I was just in with the Council of Admirals. Telling them what I knew about Sovereign, and the Collectors. Right._

She shook her head as she focused back on Anderson, Shepard and Vega coming up behind him. "I can never tell with them, sir. I'm just waiting for orders now. I think at this point it's clear I'm likely to not get to visit my mother this weekend as I'd planned, though."

He snorted softly, also shaking his head. "The things we do for duty, eh?"

"Lieutenant-Commander?" Shepard asked, furrowing her brows in confusion. The other woman looked as she always had, with short black locks of hair falling onto her forehead and generally existing in a curly/wavy halo around her head. Her skin was a dusky tan, freckles showing over her cheeks and nose. The landscape of Shepard's face had changed, her complexion almost soft. It was a little disconcerting, given that the soldier had had a slash from just under her eye that traveled down through her lips before, a relic of the Skyllian Blitz. The eyes, though; _those_ were the same as they always had been, a blue made brighter by the dark hair and long lashes. The height, too, was the same as it had always been, just a few inches below Ashley's own.

It was clear even under her uniform that Shepard had kept up with her usual fitness regimen while in her odd form of house-arrest on-base after she'd blown up that relay. Ashley hadn't seen her at _all_ during that time, not since Shepard had silently relinquished control of the _Normandy_ over to her on the Citadel all those months ago, also turning herself in to Alliance custody. To see her now, in the flesh, the first time actually speaking since their fight on Horizon… Ashley really wasn't sure what to think, other than that it was weird.

Luckily, Anderson saved her from having to puzzle it out in the middle of a conversation. "You didn't know, Shepard?"

"No," she murmured with a headshake. "I'm a bit… out of the loop these days."

Almost unconsciously Ashley was apologizing. "Sorry, ma'am. Didn't mean to keep you out of the loop."

Shepard's expression softened. She always _had_ worn her feelings on her fucking face. _Some marine. Good thing she's a sniper_. "I'm sure you had your reasons."

"I guess I did," Ashley said with a nod. Somehow she knew they were acknowledging their fight, which she appreciated. Nothing would suck more than to _actually_ pretend like it hadn't happened. Though where that left them, she didn't know. In her eyes, Shepard had still sold herself out to Cerberus, and that wasn't just something you said "Sorry, my mistake" about. You owned up, you did your time, and you _earned_ the respect and loyalty of your people again.

Ashley just hadn't seen Shepard even _try_ to do that yet. And it pissed her off, even though logically she knew it was because her former CO had been incarcerated.

"Admiral," the yeoman who'd been leading Anderson interrupted.

Anderson sighed. "Right. C'mon, Shepard, the War Council wants to see us."

They walked off without another word, but Ashley and Shepard locked gazes for a second while she passed. What Ashley saw was a rock-hard confidence that she had missed terribly since the other woman's death, and it loosened the doubt some. The doubt that Shepard wasn't Shepard, and was instead some construct, some being that was _less_ than her best friend. Given the flurry of activity, the fact that something was going _down_, it definitely made her feel a little more at-ease. If they had the old Shepard on it, then there was really no chance they could lose.

"You knew the commander?" Vega asked her, getting her attention back from Shepard's retreating back.

She couldn't hold back the contempt, despite the revelation she'd just had. "I _used_ to," she scoffed, then shook her head. "C'mon, Vega. You knew I served with her, didn't you?"

He just shrugged. "Must've forgotten somewhere along the lines."

She shook her head again as she began walking. "C'mon, I've got some news to share with you."

"Oh?" he asked, falling into step beside her.

In answer she merely held up her hand, wiggling her fingers meaningfully. He looked at it for a second, glancing away, then did a double-take. Stopping, he grabbed her hand to stop her so he could gape. "_Dios mío_! I didn't even know you were seeing someone serious, Ash!"

She snorted, entirely pleased with his response. Her run-in with Shepard was now nearly forgotten. "I spend almost every night at a girl's apartment in the slums, Vega."

He colored a little as he let her hand go. "I, uh… thought she was just a fuck buddy…"

She just gave him a sardonic look. "Well, she's not. She's my girlfriend. Or, _was_ my girlfriend. Now, she's my fiancée." Just saying it made her heart flutter. _A fucking schoolgirl. Jesus, Ash, get your shit together._

"So you proposed last night, then?" he asked as they started walking again.

"No. She actually proposed to _me_. I'd been thinking about it, but… well, that's a lot to ask of a non-com, you know?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I do. It's why I haven't been serious with anyone in a while."

She nodded her own understanding. "But _she_ asked, and she _knows_ what she's asking, what she's signing up for. She's literally asking for it, in as non-rapey a way as possible."

He chuckled before asking, "So who is she? I've never actually seen you with your girl."

It was her turn to color a bit. "It's kind of an open secret, because she's, uh… well, she's on the retrofit team…"

"And technically under your command. Yeah, I can see why you would be careful about it. But now that you're engaged it won't matter. Especially since the ship's almost ready for the black."

She blinked stupidly for a moment. "You… you really don't care?"

He shrugged. "Why would I care about that? You do your job, you get shit done. As long as she's not on the ground with you, it's not really a danger, right?" He shrugged again. "It's your business. Besides, the rule's still on the books, but it's not enforced unless it's that kinda situation."

She nodded. "That's why we're not super secretive, just quiet. It's not enforced, but the right – or wrong – people would certainly frown on it. I'm just gettin' over the Williams Curse. I don't need that kind of shit on me, especially if I'm hoping to make a little family here. Though like you say, now that we're engaged we can make it all… _official_ and shit."

"So show me a picture or _somethin'_, Ash. I wanna see what kinda girl can pin a girl like _you_ down."

She chuckled, shaking her head, but humored him, pulling up her omnitool and scrolling through the somewhat embarrassing number of pictures of Sam. A fair few were definitely _not_ for anyone's eyes but hers, but those required a whole shit-ton of personal identification – in the form of passcodes and eye scans – in order to access, _just_ in case her omnitool was ever snatched. It was possible to hack, of course, but unlikely to happen just for a few nudies of a nameless woman.

Finding one of her favorites, Ashley enlarged it, slowing down so James could get a good look. It was a morning picture of Sam, still sleepy, her hair still mussed. It was actually a screen-shot she'd taken during a morning conversation while they were still apart, when Sam was in Tokyo and Ashley was on the Citadel, when they would video-chat daily. Given the time difference, Ashley would call right before bed, acting as Sam's alarm for the morning. This meant she got the most delicious views of a sleepy, naked Samantha Traynor. They would talk as the comms specialist got dressed for her morning run – something she now did regularly instead of only in preparation for her fitness test, at Ashley's encouraging (and now that she lived off-base and could eat better food, it was a sustainable habit). This particular snapshot featured Sam in a ratty running shirt and a pair of properly-fitting gym shorts Ashley had gifted her with ("in return for the shorts you stole from your brother for me," she had said at the time). Her eyes were half-lidded, and she was just beginning a beaming smile at some compliment Ashley had given her, making the image have a bit of a tip-of-the-tongue feeling.

"Niiiiiice, Ash," James murmured, smiling almost cutely. Certainly, he wasn't leering, which was… unexpected, coming from the huge flirt that Vega was. "_Muy linda_. You can see how much she likes you just from her smile."

"A poet!" Ashley exclaimed, a few different stanzas from a few different works coming to mind. Each was more eloquent than what he'd said, but still.

He snorted, shaking his head as she closed her omnitool. "Naw, Ash. I'm just a connoisseur of pretty gir-"

Suddenly, the world exploded in red fire. As Ashley fell to the ground, all she could think was that recognized that explosion, and the sound accompanying it. _Sovereign._

The Reapers were here.

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><p>Ashley felt big hands grab at her, pulling her toward a solid, warm body, cushioning her fall, keeping her conscious. She blinked the dust and smoke out of her eyes even as she pushed herself up, finding that James had indeed saved her skull from being staved in on the edge of a desk. She helped him to his feet before pulling up her omnitool again, getting rid of the picture of Sam with a flick of her fingers before pulling up communications.<p>

"Shit. General communications are down. Hold on."

He looked over her shoulder. "You know a work-around?"

She nodded. "Having a nerdy comms specialist for a girlfriend, you pick up a few tricks. There, that should do it."

{_This is Admiral Anderson. Report in, anyone!_} The sound was patchy.

"Anderson, can you hear me?" she asked into her omni, fiddling with the signal she'd hacked. Rather than a broad-band frequency, she had linked directly to Anderson's omnitool, hoping he'd be alive and able to answer.

His answer was much clearer. {_Lieutenant-Commander Williams, is that you?_}

"Yes, sir."

{_What's your status?_}

"I'm with Vega. We were on our way to the Normandy to check on some things. What the fuck happened, sir? Is it Reapers? I have no goddamn windows."

{_Yes, Williams. The Council is dead, but I have Shepard. I can't raise the Normandy; you head there. I'll meet you at the landing zone._}

"Aye, sir," she said, patching her communications into the earbud James handed her before closing her omni. She then started to run full-tilt. They needed to get to the ship and open communications on it as soon as possible.

And she needed to reach Samantha. Sooner than that.

"We need to get outside," she huffed, James nodding in understanding. Luckily – though the reason for it obviously sucked – the entire floor was a goddamn fenced-in porch at this point, so finding access to the outdoors was rather easy. Not so lucky was that they were at least a hundred stories off the ground.

_I have to get to Sam. I need to make sure she's okay, make sure she's on the ship. Fuck, __**this**__ is why they had that fucking rule to begin with. I don't even care about all these other people right now. I just need to keep Sam safe…_

Swallowing her panic down and shoving it aside was difficult, but she managed it, as she always had. Working their way down to a maintenance walkway, they were finally able to build up some speed just as Anderson's voice piped into her earbud once more.

{_Lieutenant-Commander, do you read me?_}

"Loud and clear, Anderson," she huffed, not bothering to keep the strain of sprinting out of her voice.

{_I'm patching Shepard in._}

"Roger. We're almost to the _Normandy_," she said, spotting the gleaming new paintjob of its sleek hull as they rounded the corner of the outside of the dry dock's building. Pointing, she silently informed James to climb up the ladder ahead so they could run along the _top_ of the embarkation tube, allowing them to hail the suspended ship and get on board. "I've got Lieutenant Vega with me. No enemies, but we've had to be clever about our routing," she huffed as she took a running leap onto the ladder herself. James turned when he was up, holding down one beefy arm. His giant hand closed around hers and he lifted her bodily from the ladder and placed her on her feet. Then they were running again.

{_Good. We're about ffffffiiiiiiiive-ive mmmm-mmmiiinnnuuuuuutes ooooo_-}

The transmission cut out then. "Anderson! Anderson! Jesus fuck!" she swore. She didn't have time to stop and fiddle with their connection. She merely kept running, spying the hatch open up ahead and feeling her heart somehow begin to pound faster. She couldn't stop. She had to get to Sam.


	4. Chapter 4

**Samantha**

"Specialist Traynor, I am having trouble connecting to outdoor personnel and could use your assistance."

Sam furrowed her brow. _EDI is a VI, but she just said "I." That's not right…_ "I'm working on it, EDI," she answered. "Why are the inertial dampeners not working correctly?"

"Engineer Adams is seeing to it. They should be fully functional momentarily." Just as EDI finished, a low hum reverberated around Samantha, followed swiftly by the sudden evening out of the ground she was standing on. Her path now free and clear, Sam went running, forgetting all about her toolkit as she burst into the security screening room.

"Shit," she let out, stepping into the screen as two very harried-looking, rifle-wielding security officers activated the scan. Chomping at the bit, trying very hard not to actually jump up and down with her impatience, Sam was out of that screen as soon as humanly possible, launching herself through the door and sprinting to the Captain's Yeoman's station.

"Okay, EDI, I'm in," she said, though obviously the VI would know that… _Whatever, I talk to myself. So what?_ Her Inner Monologuer was threatening to be her Outer Narrator, which was fine. Anything to get the job done, really.

Before she could do more than start looking at what the problem might be, however, she was practically tackled from behind.

"Oh, thank God you're safe!"

"Ashley?!"

She managed to turn in the LC's embrace, burying her face in the leather of Ashley's father's blue leather jacket. She was immediately surrounded by the familiar scents of lavender, lemongrass, the leather of the old jacket, and that ever-present tobacco-ish scent that followed Ashley wherever she went, and the relief that accompanied it was nearly overwhelming. Samantha wasn't even aware of just how worried she had been until she was presented with her whole, hearty, and hale fiancée. Taking a deep breath, she clung to that feeling as long as she could.

Which wasn't long, as it turned out. "We gotta get comms up, Ash," the large mountain of a man who had accompanied Ashley onto the ship shouted, breaking their moment. Sam had met him once, out drinking. John? James? José? Ashley pulled back, smiling apologetically as she quickly wiped away the single tear that had escaped onto Sam's cheek for her.

"We got the best comm nerd this side of the equator right here," she said gently, huskily, and despite the terror of the situation, Sam suddenly desperately wanted to be naked in that woman's arms. Shoving aside that desire, she shakily turned back to her station, pulling up the list again and looking to see what the problem was.

Typing quickly, she got partial communications up. "Alright, I have partial access."

"We need to find Anderson and Shepard," Ashley said, looking over Sam's shoulder even though both of them knew that Ash had only a rudimentary understanding of the base code Sam was now perusing.

"I don't suppose you have a military comm ID tag for me?" Sam asked hopefully, only to be shot down when Ash shook her head. "Damn. Alright, let's just-"

The ID tag she needed suddenly popped up on a new screen, along with Shepard's, courtesy of their remarkably omniscient VI (_VI my arse. She is definitely an AI)_. "Right. Scary," Sam breathed, but took the information, plugging in the ID tags hurriedly. Her partial access immediately gave her the location of the two officers, blinking cheerfully from a map on a new screen, taking over the window that had shown her the tags in the first place.

{_Take my hand,_} Shepard's voice suddenly piped through the console's speaker.

{_You can't help me,_} a small child's voice spoke. It was unknown if the child was male or female, but it really didn't matter. Mostly all of them were completely shocked to hear it at all. It also made it clear, however, that her partial access also got her partial communications, meaning they could hear Anderson and Shepard, but not speak back. They learned this by repeatedly trying to raise the duo.

"Bloody hell," Samantha mumbled, completely blocking out even the presence of her fiancée. Now, she had a problem to solve. Nerdy Sam Brain was coming to the fore, and her fingers flew as she tried to bolster the connection.

Meanwhile, they were privy to the conversation Anderson and Shepard were having. {_Every minute these machines are here, thousands of innocent people die,_} came Anderson's voice.

{_It's bad enough fighting a war, but it's worse knowing that no matter how hard you try… you can't save them all_.}

"Damn Shepard and her hero-talk," Ashley muttered, pulling Samantha out of her stupor. Ashley then gripped Sam's shoulder tightly for a minute before marching away toward the cockpit, the big marine on her heels.

"Where are you going?" Sam called after her.

"I'm the ranking officer on board, baby. Gotta go take command and shit," was her answer. _This is real. This is happening. Oh my Jesus fucking Christ, what are we going to do?!_

Anderson's voice pulled her back to action once more. Ashley could handle the combat part. Sam had to get communications working again. They had to get Anderson and Shepard. Shepard had saved the galaxy twice now. If they had Shepard on this ship, then maybe she could do it again. _Third time's the charm…_

_It's the third time for the Reapers, too, Sammy._

_Not. Helping._

{_They hit so fast. I thought we'd have more time_,} Anderson was saying.

{_We knew they were coming._} Shepard sounded annoyed.

{_And they still just… __**cut through**__ our defenses,_} Anderson growled in response. {_We need to go to the Citadel, talk to the Council._}

{_The Citadel?!_} Now Shepard was almost incredulous. {_The fight's __**here**_.}

{_It'll be everywhere soon enough,_} Anderson responded. {_You said it yourself: the Reapers will destroy everything if we don't stop them. The Council __**has**__ to help us,_} he continued after a few grunts of exertion. Samantha couldn't help but wonder what in God's name they were doing as they spoke. Obviously trying to get to a landing zone for the _Normandy_, but where? All her map showed her was that they were in the belly of some nameless office building.

The conversation went on, doubting whether the Council would actually help – apparently Shepard had some experience to tell her otherwise? – but Samantha was now in view of getting communications to work two ways again. A few more insertions of fixes to bugs in the code, and she had it.

"Ashley!" she shouted, then remembered internal comms on the ship. "Ashley," she said again, quieter and into the radio on her lapel, "I have them two-way. I don't know for how long, though."

She didn't even get a response. Instead, Ashley was hailing the admiral. {_Anderson, we got you for a minute. Status?_}

{_We're headed to the spaceport on the water_,} he said, huffing now. Clearly, they were running. {_ETA three minutes._}

{_We made it to the Normandy, taking heavy fire, but nothing Joker can't handle. I- Oh God! They're gonna take down that dreadnought! Evasive maneuvers!_}

Shepard's voice cut in. {_Oh fuck, we gotta move Anders_-}

Sam didn't hear any more of Shepard's yelling, as suddenly the ship rocked to the side, sending her sprawling to the floor once more, despite the inertial dampeners having been activated some time ago. _Imagine how bad it would be if they hadn't been, Sammy_. Shepard's grunts and shouts sounded in her ear, the soldier obviously being thrown around. It did mean that they were very close to the two people on the ground, though, if that blast had affected them _and_ the _Normandy_.

Sam was on her feet as soon as the movement of the ship halted enough to allow her, running up to the galaxy map and zooming in on their location. In the 3D holographic representation of Vancouver, she could see the blue blip that marked the _Normandy's_ location. Near it was a ship whose eezo core had clearly been compromised, as it existed as a bright starburst suspended in space. Standing with wide eyes for a minute, Sam only went back to her station when Anderson's voice piped back in through her console's speaker.

{_Normandy! We're going to reroute! Do you copy?_}

"Yes, we do, but you can't hear me because of this _bloody_ virus they introduced into the damn _server_!" Sam shouted out loud, actually hitting the side of her console. "The only reason it hasn't taken out our communications entirely is because I think our VI is actually an AI and is combating it even while taking care of other systems! No other VI is this damn _smart_!"

Her Outer Narrator had now officially turned into her Useless, Angry Shouter. One more step, and Sam would be muttering to herself in a corner about how the code just wouldn't behave. It had happened once before, in university. Her ex, Penelope, had had to email her professor on her behalf to ask for a few more days on the assignment on medical grounds.

Penelope had been taken on Horizon by the Collectors; she was dead now. As would everyone else be, soon, if they didn't get _out of here_. Sam had no time to go the loony route. So she embraced her anger, funneling it into hyper-focus, tuning out the conversation over the radio and turning her attention to eradicating the virus.

After a minute or so, she had news for Ashley, though. "Ashley," she said, activating her comms. "They're by a downed gunship in the harbor. They're activating its radio. I lost their location with the explosion, but that radio _should_ have a distress beacon. It… there, I have their location. We're only a minute away."

{_On it_,} came Joker's voice.

It was clear moments later that Anderson and Shepard were in the middle of an intense firefight. Sam couldn't help but to look up at the galaxy map, watching the _Normandy_ fly in on the blinking light that was the emergency beacon.

She actually rolled her eyes at Joker's, "The cavalry has arrived!" But she couldn't deny that it looked rather dramatic on the galaxy map display as they swooped in and fired on the Reaper ground units…

Not even a second later, Ashley and the hulking marine were sprinting past her, accessing the lift and rushing inside. Ashley made eye contact with Sam just as the doors swished closed. Sam couldn't help the sinking feeling in her gut as her fiancée's face disappeared. Something was telling her she wouldn't see her lover again for quite some time.

But that made no sense. She was right there.

Minutes later, they were headed for the relay, leaving their home behind.

_Earth. The birthplace of my parents._ _We… we need to get it back_.

* * *

><p><em>AN: All caught up to what I've written at this point! Now I'm going to go hurry up and get my canon ME2 Shepard through so I can start it on ME3 and play while I write. I apologize in advance, as it might be a bit until I write more. Also, I just started a new job and it has a bit of a commute, and I have to be very careful what I write on my work computer, even if I'm using google drive or something like it - I tend to write adult themes, and I'm unwilling to write that at work, even if they don't do screengrabs or anything like that._

_So. I am so grateful for all the reviews and follows and favorites I've already gotten on this. I guess people really did want to see my Sam and Ash continue. :)_


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: So... I forgot that I'd actually written 5 chapters, not 4, and had sent the 5th to be beta'd by my lovely, wonderful, awesome, writing-goddess of a beta, Raven Sinead. And she sent it back to me today. So. You all get a little bit more. Yay!_

* * *

><p><strong>Ashley<strong>

_Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now, and at the hour of our death._

Ashley didn't even purposefully think of it, but it came to mind as they exited atmo. Given everything she'd just seen… it seemed apt, if nothing else. A prayer for those who lived, and for those who died.

"What the hell's goin' on? Where's Anderson? Where are we goin'?"

Ashley looked up from the door to the lift. She'd just been about to go back up to the CIC and check on Sam, but James' query stopped her. He sounded indignant. And Shepard wasn't answering him.

Finally, James got impatient and shouted, "Hey!"

Shepard looked back and said simply, "We're leaving."

"Leaving?!"

"What's going on, ma'am?" Ashley said, leaving the lift and walking over to look over the commander's shoulder. She may have issues with Shepard, but Anderson had reinstated the woman before her very eyes. This was now her CO again, and they were in the middle of the invasion of the Reapers. She wasn't gonna split hairs, not now, not when it came to her job. She'd follow orders. _At least until mutiny seems like a better option…_

"Anderson wants us to go to the Citadel, Ash," Shepard explained, pulling up a holographic screen on the console in front of her. "We need to get help for the fight."

"Bullshit!" James countered, getting Shepard's attention. Ashley almost reflexively reached out to stop him, then thought better of it. Let him learn what a Shepard tongue-lashing was like on his own. "He wouldn't order us to leave!"

"I was there, Lieutenant. I know what he said. And he's right. We don't have a choice." Shepard sounded… tired. Resigned. Ashley wasn't sure _what_ she heard in the woman's voice. "Without help, this war's already over."

"Forget it," James said, his eyes hard and his voice harder. "Drop me off someplace, 'cuz I-"

That did it. The Wrath of Shepard awakened, if only briefly. "Enough!" Shepard shouted, grabbing his shoulder and shoving him hard, walking with him until his back was pressed firmly against the wall. "Don't you think _I'd_ rather stay and fight, too?" They were quiet for a minute, holding each other's gazes. Finally, she let go of him, flapping her hand as if to get him out of her face. "We're going to the Citadel. You want out? You can catch a damn ride back from there. Good luck."

With a similar gesture, James shook his head and stomped off, not even catching Ashley's gaze as he headed to his precious weapon's bench. Ashley couldn't blame him. She used to be a gunnery chief. She knew the comfort that was fieldstripping and cleaning weapons, modding them, and putting them back together for each member of the ground crew. There was something meditative about it.

{_Ashley._}

_Sam? Right, she can hack directly into my omnitool_. _Good to know she's not on the channel with everyone else._ "What's up, babe?" Ashley asked aloud, though softly, turning around to keep the conversation as private as possible.

{_I've got a message for Shepard. I think her earbud is damaged, and she has no omnitool, so I can't contact her directly. You should get her a new one and an omnitool as soon as possible._}

"Got it. You said you had a message?"

{_Yes. Joker should have patched it through down there already._}

"Gotcha. Thanks. And… honey?"

{_Hmm?_}

"I'm really glad you're okay. And… I'm just… Mom, my sisters..."

{_I know. But hope isn't lost. You're here, Shepard's here. We'll get them back._}

Ashley smiled. "You bet your ass we will, Sam. I'll come by soon. Shepard's waving me over."

{_Alright. I… I love you, Ashley_.}

Ashley smiled. "I love you, too, baby. And just as soon as we can, I am gonna marry the _crap_ outta you."

Closing her omnitool on Sam's nervous yet giddy giggle, she went over next to Shepard.

"Who was that?" Shepard asked, her expression showing her intense curiosity… and the beginning of some serious ribbing, if Ashley knew her at all.

Ashley just shook her head. Now wasn't the time to catch up, and she wasn't ready to take up their friendship without some serious talking. "I'll tell you later. What's this communication?"

Shepard's features immediately schooled. "Liara's on Mars. We have to go get her. She's found some weapon or something in the Prothean archives. We need her and that intel before we completely lose the system."

Ashley blinked a moment, then laid a hand on Shepard's shoulder. She could see the worry in the lines around the woman's eyes. "We'll get her, Miriam," she said softly. She felt betrayed, yes, but Ashley was anything but heartless. Shepard may have done it through Cerberus, but she'd still pulled off a miracle defeating the Collectors. Ashley just really wished Shepard had done it with the Alliance. She would have dropped everything to transfer into Miriam's service for that suicide mission if the commander hadn't been taking Cerberus's blood money to do it. Ashley's feelings were just… so fucking jumbled, confused. But she still cared about the commander, and she knew how Miriam felt about Liara – similarly to how Ashley felt for Sam.

And now they had to rescue the asari before the Reapers got there. Ashley would be out of her mind with worry. Thank God her fiancée was on this ship with her. This ship was probably the safest place in the whole goddamn galaxy.

Shepard nodded, her expression showing her gratitude for Ashley's understanding of all the nuances going on. "Grab your gear!" she yelled over to James. "We're on the shuttle in five."

"Do _you_ have gear, Shepard?" Ashley asked, already unzipping her jacket as they headed over to the lockers.

Shepard shook her head. "Not the usual. But you have an extra, yeah? I'm not that much shorter than you. A few adjustments and I'm good."

Ash frowned as she stripped down to her underwear and immediately put her hair into its bun. _Goodbye, days of getting to walk through the halls with my hair down_. Non-deployment had its benefits. "My armor is way heavier than yours, Miriam."

Shepard shrugged. "It's what's available. I'll manage. Just won't be able to do any acrobatics," she finished with a slight smile.

Ashley chuckled as she pulled on her compression suit. It was designed to keep her body under the right kind of pressure without a gas suit, the only part of the armor with air being the helmet. Far safer for combat situations, even if it was more costly with all the custom fit required.

Looking at her ring, so pretty on her finger, fitting so nicely, the lieutenant-commander sighed, slipping it off. She put it in her locker next to her father's rosary that she kept near her arms and armor as a sort of good luck charm. But the thing glinted in the lights of the shuttle bay, forcing Ashley to reconsider. Staring at it a moment, she finally grabbed it, took off her dog tags, and slipped the ring on the chain. Re-affixing it around her neck, she continued with her armor, this promise from – and to – Sam now lying next to her heart.

As she pulled on the thin mesh under-armor, she studied Shepard. The commander was already in her mesh, now working on adjusting the armor pads that she would attach over it. It seemed Shepard did not notice Ashley's hesitation over a simple piece of jewelry. Good. It still just wasn't time to catch up, to tell her friend about her engagement.

She wasn't sure she was ready to be her friend just yet, anyway. Clearly the higher-ups had decided Shepard hadn't committed so heinous a crime. But this was about more than duty to Ashley. It had been a personal affront to the LC, and she wasn't ready to just drop it yet.

Snapping her armor plating into place, she reached for her weapons pack. Checking the weapons briefly, she slid it into place over her air filter and oxygen supply before grabbing her helmet and snapping it into place. She checked the seals, brought up her heads-up display, and secured her omnitool for battle. Who knew what they'd run into down there? But at least there was hardly any atmosphere on the planet. Could Reaper forces fight if they couldn't breathe? What _did_ they breathe?

It was unimportant. All that mattered was that _Ashley_ could breathe. And she could. Bonking Shepard and James over the head as she passed – a good-luck ritual she'd taken from football players of old – she was in the shuttle and ready to go. Beating them both.

{_We're ready to drop you, Shepard,_} came Joker's voice over her radio.

"Got it, Joker. We'll be up and out in just a minute here," Shepard responded, her helmeted her pointing toward the omnitool she was adjusting on her wrist. Stepping into the shuttle behind James, she shut the door behind her.

A sinking feeling settled in Ashley's stomach. Why did she feel the door was somehow sealing her fate? She wished she could've held Sam a little longer before duty had called.

But this was how it had to be. They had to get whatever edge they could against the Reapers. And they had to get Blue off that rock. Ashley didn't ever want to leave a friend behind again.

* * *

><p><em>AN #2: Just a quick note. I wanted to really focus on the things they did to build these characters for us. So Ashley will probably be more religious than in-game. Sam might be, too. I have ideas swirling. But as with everything I write, it is being written by the seat of my pants. I do jot down ideas for future scenes, and ideas to explain things that might have bugged me in-game, but mostly I make this shit up as I go. So. Anyway. Yeah. Ashley's going to be religious, not just spiritual. As evidenced by this traditional prayer to Mary I open with._


	6. Chapter 6

**Samantha**

Now that she knew Ashley was safe, Samantha's thoughts turned to her family. Her mother, father, and her brother Richard were on Horizon, thank the Lord. Timothy, Richard's twin, was at Grissom Academy, making it into their accelerated engineering program while also going through military training. It was a new pilot program, the first time one got a college education _while_ receiving their military training, and he was in the first year of students accepted. Everyone had been so proud of him. She should… she should check on Grissom, see that everything was alright. It was full of students who may not have anywhere to go with Earth taken…

Ashley's mum had been on Earth, as well as two of her sisters. Were they okay? Would Ash be able to get a hold of them to find out? Would she be able to let her family know she'd made it off planet? One of her sisters had just gotten married; was in fact on her honeymoon. Sam had accompanied Ash to the wedding in Taiwan the week before. It had been lovely, and Sam _loved_ seeing Ashley with her sisters. The girl's husband was a soldier. They'd probably be recalled so he could fight. What would Sarah do? Where would she go?

Samantha's heart was threatening to beat right out of her chest. She needed to calm down. Reaching to the top of her display, she contacted a friend. "Joker, what do I do? I've never served active-duty before."

{_Kinda busy here, Sam._}

She frowned. "I know you're busy. I need something to do. I'm going crazy."

{_Just hold tight-_}

"Joker," she interrupted, feeling the tears in the back of her throat as a lump the size of a grapefruit. "Joker, my fiancée is Ashley Williams and she is going down onto that planet armed for battle and there are Reaper forces headed this way and we are racing the clock and _I need something to do so that I do not go insane_."

There was a pause, then, {_Shiiiiiiiiiiiit. Okay. There's a dust storm headed this way. We're going to lose comms at some point. Pull out all your tricks to keep us in touch. It's the best I got, Sam. Until you have a commanding officer, that's all I got._}

Samantha nodded. "I can work with that. Patching in to their comms right now."

{_That's the spirit. I've seen her get through a lot, Sam. Her __**and**__ Shepard. She'll be fine._}

"Thanks, Joker."

She affixed the radio bud to her ear, patching in Ashley, James, and Shepard's new signal. She didn't say anything. She knew enough to know that unless she had something to add or some warning to give that it was not appropriate to hold up the comm line with chatter. Shepard didn't even know who Sam was. This was all so odd. The ship had been in the air for all of five minutes before they were sent to do something. There'd been no time to assign duties, no time to set up a chain of command. Hell, Ashley, Shepard, and James were the only people on the ship who were even trained for ground combat. Everyone else on this ship were techy geeks who were there as part of the retrofitting team. But it didn't matter. They simply had to throw themselves in and _go_. A job had to be done, and they'd been ordered to do it.

Samantha's thoughts were pulled out of herself at her lover's voice.

{_Well, they know we're here now!_}

"Oh shit, is that… _gunfire_?" Sam whispered, horrified at the sounds she was hearing. She had only heard gunfire in a combat situation once before, when Ashley shot down a Collector drone in her parents' house on Horizon. And it was only one creature that died, and it wasn't even human. Now, though, Sam could hear bullets chewing through the Martian landscape. She could hear the grunts of all three soldiers on the ground. She could especially hear Ashley, hear noises she never thought she'd hear issue from her lover's mouth, grunts of discomfort, a shout of triumph, a quick prayer to her God for her soul, for the lives she was taking.

"EDI," Sam said, furrowing her brows in worry at the sounds she heard.

"Yes, Specialist Traynor?"

"I know the storm headed in will cut out our communications. But in the meantime, shouldn't I be able to access their helmet cameras?"

"That is correct, though per Alliance protocol it is only Commander Shepard's helmet that the specialist observes."

Sam frowned. "So what's wrong? Why can't I see it?"

"We are not receiving signal. However, I can activate the camera from here. Would you like me to do so?"

_Bloody VI my arse_… "Yes, EDI. Please do so."

An icon on her console began blinking, and pulling it up, Sam saw a sight that horrified her. A man in armor, white with black and yellow detailing, fell to the ground. Blood spurted out from the space between helmet and chest plate. She could only imagine the sound he made.

Shepard's voice whooped. "Nice one, Williams!"

_That was Ashley. That's what she's capable of, what she's been trained to do. I… I don't even know what to do with this information. How can someone so soft and lovely and generous with herself be so deadly and efficient in killing?_ Then another thought hit Samantha. _Wait… if that man could be shot by a sharpshooter, then Ashley could be, despite all that armor I know she wears that I've never seen her in… _

She was suddenly incredibly afraid.

But the marines on the ground were not. Sam had missed some of their conversation in her musing, but was pulled back in by Ashley's voice once more.

{_I need a straight answer, Shepard._}

Shepard's voice sounded dubious as her helmet cam swung to look right at Ashley. It was… strange, to see her lover like this. {_About what?_}

{_Do you know anything about this? What is Cerberus doing here?_}

_Oh fuck… that armor. It was Cerberus,_ Sam thought to herself, absently scanning code on a second screen for anything that wasn't right. _Ashley is going to be absolutely livid_.

{_What makes you think __**I**__ know what they're up to?_} Perhaps Sam was imagining it, but she could have sworn that Shepard was very careful and… _deliberate_ with that answer.

"C'mon Ashley, now is _not the time_," Sam whispered, knowing she would not be overheard by those on the ground until she hit the command on her console to transmit.

{_You worked for them. How am I supposed to believe you cut all ties?_}

Sam could almost swear she heard Shepard's irritation. {_I was never __**with**__ Cerberus, Williams. It was a temporary alliance that I was __**glad**__ to be done with once I took out the Collector base. I haven't talked to anyone affiliated with them since, nor would I should they try._}

{_It's true, Ash,_} the giant marine chimed in. _I swear his name is either James or John, _Samantha added silently to herself. {_Shepard was under lock and key the whole time since you brought her to Earth. I was her regular guard. No communications in and out, no omnitool, and she was debriefed extensively. She's clean, they just needed to look they were doing something for the Batarians._}

Ashley only gave a noncommittal hum.

{_Cut the chatter,_} Shepard snapped suddenly. {_I __hear something_.}

Sam hadn't heard anything, but she admitted to herself she was fully engrossed in the conversation. She could read Ashley's defensive body language on her screen, and knew from her tone that Ash was not convinced. But they were in the middle of a ground mission, and the lieutenant-commander merely lifted her sniper rifle and walked forward as Shepard's helmet cam swung around once more.

With the three of them quiet, Sam could hear the metallic racket Shepard must have heard. _What on Earth could that be_? Sam asked herself, peering intently at the view from the camera now. _Are those shots from a rifle? Who's shooting?_

Suddenly a ventilation grate burst outward, a blue and white figure following after it. The figure jumped to the ground, turned, and some kind of blue fire flew from the figure toward the opening to the ventilation shaft. Caught in mid-air were two white, black, and yellow-adorned Cerberus soldiers. Shots rang out, and the men were dead. The blue fire extinguished, and the figure on the ground – an asari, by the looks of her – walked up to the dead men, aiming her pistol and ensuring their deaths.

_Oh shit. I've officially seen biotics for the first time…_

Shepard's helmet began moving, her arm shooting out to lower a rifle just barely in the camera's view. {_Easy there, lieutenant. She's with us._}

Shepard sounded… happy? Excited? It was tempered by some slight nervousness. A quick glance at the crew's vitals showed a sharp increase in the commander's heart rate.

{_Shepard? Thank the Goddess!_} the asari shouted in relief as she turned, dropping her pistol as she broke into a run. Samantha watched as the blue-skinned woman adorned in a white lab coat came running for her, and then her arms were around Shepard's neck, Sam's view mostly obscured.

{_I'm here, baby_} she heard Shepard murmur.

_This must be Doctor T'Soni. Ashley mentioned their relationship. Clearly it's alive and well._

She listened as they discussed the device Liara had uncovered. It was somewhat interesting, but what was very interesting to Samantha was the little interactions she saw. Ashley and Dr. T'Soni hugged, clearly were friendly with each other. But whenever Ashley came into view she held herself defensively. Clearly, the woman was still in a hostile place regarding her once-best friend.

Shepard and Liara, on the other hand, were a hot mess of awkward. Their tones were… stilted. Their movements were not of familiar lovers but rather of people who did not know where they stood with each other. They spoke of Cerberus and the device, yes, but underneath was an unspoken conversation about their relationship and whether or not it would continue. It was _utterly_ fascinating.

Suddenly James was being sent away to the shuttle, very much against his wishes, and the three women left in the Archive building were headed to the door, where it was clear Cerberus soldiers were attempting to hack their way in.

{_We've got company,_} Shepard said, lifting a pair of SMGs from the holsters on her hip. {_Let's do what we do best, ladies_.}

* * *

><p><em>AN: I decided fuck it and found a good walkthrough of the game on youtube. So hopefully I'll be able to do some writing even though what I'm **playing** is actually ME2. I'm also working on a one-shot that will give Miriam Shepard some backstory. I am excited for it once it's done. :)_


	7. Chapter 7

**Ashley**

Ashley Williams hated few things. Cerberus was near the top of that list, as were mushrooms and light beer. But this _fucking_ turret had jumped _straight_ to the top of that list. Gathering herself together, she leapt out from behind the storage container she'd been using as cover, allowing Shepard to use it next. With a sound that was more than a grunt but less than a yell she rolled forward, finding her feet and taking three running steps until she was behind her next bit of cover. The whole time there were bullets chewing up the floor behind her. If Sam could still hear all this, she was probably wetting her pants.

"I'm sorry, Samantha," she huffed in a whisper, gathering her breath before the final push. "I never wanted you to see what it is we go through on the ground, baby." She'd heard of non-coms losing their minds with worry. And if Sam had been down here in the midst of this? She knew she'd lose her mind.

Launching herself again, Ashley rolled, coming up on her feet and running the rest of the way out of the reach of that fucking turret. A few more seconds and Shepard joined her, and a minute after that Liara did, as well. All three of them were unscathed, though breathing hard. Ash could see Shepard's eyes wide, the pupils dilated – a sure sign she was high on adrenaline. The LC had seen it often enough to recognize it.

"C'mon. I see more fuckers in there," Shepard growled, unclasping both submachine guns she kept at her hip and running for the door. She was ready to lay down some fucking damage.

Ashley just grinned, pulling her assault rifle off her back. "Now that's what I'm talking about!"

They ran in with guns blazing. There were probably seven or eight guys in here, but they all fell rather quickly. Ashley was most amazed at the cold efficiency in Liara, however. They hadn't spoken in quite a while, having fallen out of contact maybe a year after the _Normandy's_ destruction. She had sensed a change in the asari in that time, but only so much can come out in emails and the occasional voice call. Now that they were here, in person, Ashley was astonished. The once-shy archeologist was killing with abandon, her mind clearly one step ahead of the people she was shooting at.

The asari made this abundantly clear when as she walked past the last dying man, aiming her pistol at him and shooting even as she reached for the console controls, shutting down the auto-turret. Ashley was… shocked. It would be like watching Sam turn into a ruthless, efficient killer. It was a complete mind-fuck, and even in the heat of the fight, Ashley was having a difficult time ridding herself of the cognitive dissonance that was her memory of Liara versus the reality of Liara now.

"They've made it to the Archives," the asari said. Ashley shook herself of her shock, watching as the security footage died.

She scowled, memorizing the details of this Eva Coré's face. "And it looks like they won't be sending a tram anytime soon…" she added.

Shepard backed away from the console, shaking her head. "And we can't override it. It's on an entirely separate network. I'm completely locked out. Fuck."

Ashley got an idea. "Not completely," she said, already moving.

Shepard fell in line behind her. "What's up?"

"What if we found a short-range transmitter, helmet-to-helmet. Convince them we're with them, and that we've killed the Alliance forces."

Shepard stopped, nodding. "I like it. See what you can find, I need to check something in here."

Ashley nodded, crossing the rest of the room to the closest dead body. Pulling up her omnitool, she scanned for a radio that was still active.

"Commander! I found something!"

Shepard was with her in just a few seconds. "What've you got?"

She was already leaning, trying to figure out how to unlock the Cerberus soldier's helmet. "He's got a functioning radio in his helmet. If I could just-"

She was cut off by a venting noise, the clear section of the helmet sliding away and revealing…

"Oh God," Ashley gasped, swallowing to control the urge to vomit. "He… he looks like a husk."

Shepard just nodded, leaning over to fish out the radio. "Yeah. Not quite, but they've definitely done something to him."

"They claim to stand for humanity, but then they do this to their own people?!" Ashley frowned, watching as Shepard calmly stood back up with the radio in-hand. "Don't you see? That could've been you, Miriam. For all I knew, that's what Cerberus had done to you when they saved you or whatever it was."

Shepard scowled. Ashley couldn't see her whole face, but she could see her eyes, and that was enough. "How can you compare me to that thing?"

Ashley was beyond frustrated, adrenaline still pumping through her veins. She'd been through a lot of shit today. The last twenty-four hours had been a fucking emotional rollercoaster, her engagement the night before followed by the Reapers' invasion of Earth this morning. Hell, it had probably only been about _twelve_ hours. Her mother and sisters had been on Earth, and she had no idea how they fared. There was only so much she could hold back.

"I don't know what to think, Miriam! Not since they got their hands on you. Is it really you? Would you even know if they were controlling you somehow? Indoctrinated people don't know when they're indoctrinated. What if they did that to you, then let you loose to the Alliance?"

Shepard just sighed, her tone defeated. "That's not fair, Ash. And you know it."

Ashley shook her head, deflating some. "I… I'm just talking out loud. This whole shit-show is a lot to take in, especially when last night… Look, I don't need you to answer. I honestly doubt there's anything you could say to convince me right now. I just… need some time, to get to know you again, to see that you're the same Miriam who I lost three years ago."

Shepard marched closer, her hand coming to rest on Ashley's shoulder, her eyes catching Ashley's. "I'm the same person I always was, Ash. Time won't change that. But if that's what you need, then alright. When things slow down a bit, we can try to talk. We can air it all out, and see if we can still work together."

Ashley nodded, seeing her old friend in those sparkling blue eyes staring back at her through the faceplates of their helmets. "Yeah, okay."

Shepard gave a curt nod. "Okay. So. Let's go kick some ass and take some names, yeah?"

Ashley grinned, pulling her sniper from her back. "Let's."

* * *

><p>The door opened onto a cavernous room. The room itself didn't have much going on, an inner and outer circular walkway dominating. But in the center was familiar-looking technology, obviously Prothean. Ashley was suddenly transported back to the beacon on Eden Prime, watching the excavation team carefully extract the thing from the ground. She'd only been on the planet a couple of days, a glorified guard job that she was way over-qualified for. It was her name, and not her credentials, that put her on that rock, and she had been both resentful and out to prove herself.<p>

_I sure did prove myself__,_ she thought darkly, looking down the barrel of her assault rifle toward the right, clearing the room with Shepard. _I was the only one to survive. Didn't even have any time to get to know anyone before my credentials were put to the test._

"I can access the data from there," Liara said, pulling Ashley out of her past. Watching the asari walk boldly up to a console in front of the towering, glowing Prothean data trove, she expected to be transported to the past once more, but it didn't happen. Prothean artifacts and Liara together was certainly familiar, but this new Liara was not the same. There was no wonder in her voice, no awe at the Protheans or this artifact. There was only cold, calculating data-retrieval, and Ashley found it disconcerting to no end.

"Ashley, walk a perimeter, make sure we don't have any company," Shepard said.

She nodded. "You got it, Commander."

Starting around the side of the room, she was startled when she heard them both speaking to someone. Turning, she saw Liara with a gun pointed into the face of… a hologram.

{_Illusive Man__,_} the asari almost spat, furthering Ashley's discomfort. _I don't know that woman at __**all**__ anymore…_

Turning, she continued her perimeter clearing. They hadn't found Eva Coré yet, alive or dead, and Ashley would not be surprised if they found her squirreled away somewhere in this giant room. The hologram was no threat, and besides that, Liara and Shepard had it under control. She'd been given an order, and she would follow it. The rest of this room might seem simple, but she could already see a place where someone might be hiding, and she was determined to find that sleeper agent who had turned this whole place of learning and inquisitive minds into a giant shit-show.

Just as she approached the structure on the opposite side of the room, Liara's voice sounded panicked in her ear. {_Miriam, the data is not here! It's a local download and wipe… it is still in this room, more than likely._}

Ashley rounded the corner and found the woman she'd been hoping to find at some point in the flesh. "Hey, back up!" she shouted, but the woman wouldn't move. "Commander, I've got- ah!"

Dr. Eva Coré burst into action, pushing Ashley's rifle aside as her foot came up, catching the LC in the chest. All Ashley could think as she exploded backward, landing on her ass and sliding all the way to the railing, was that the thin woman packed one _hell_ of a punch. Halting, she sprang to her feet as fast as she could, feeling the muscles directly under her breasts already sore. They would be bruised later. _Shit, she got me that good through my __armor__… she's not __human__._

_{__Don't lose her!__}_ Shepard yelled into their radios. Snatching up her rifle, Ashley was after the group. Shepard was in the lead, of course, as she'd been right next to the door. But Ashley was fast, and she had a personal little score to settle with that bitch, kicking her right in the chest. She had to return the damn favor.

Ashley didn't dare let off any gunfire as she ran for fear of hitting either Shepard or Liara, who wasn't even armored. Her biotic barrier could protect her in the thin atmosphere for a time, and against bullets, but it required constant energy from the asari, and while she was quite powerful, even _her_ energy reserves were not bottomless, meaning there was the very real risk she could be shot and killed by friendly fire. Instead she merely ran, keeping all three women in front of her in her sights. She was gaining on them, but cursed the need to climb the ladder that was quickly coming up.

Making the split-second decision to stow her assault rifle rather than being slowed by climbing one-handed, she mounted the ladder, climbing as fast as she could. Getting to the top, she saw a Cerberus shuttle lowering, Eva Coré running full-speed for it.

"_Normandy_! James! Anybody!" Shepard yelled, but it was too late. Ashley watched as the woman they were chasing took a running leap, landing perfectly inside the shuttle, turning as she landed to look back at them. The lieutenant-commander couldn't read her expression, of course, but she could have sworn the woman was gloating as the shuttle door closed and the vessel began to rise.

{_I got this one!_} James's voice suddenly piped up in their radios. _We must have comms back._ Looking around, Ashley confirmed that the storm had blown itself out. Out of the corner of her eye flew the Normandy's shuttle, and Ashley turned her head, watching as James piloted the shuttle directly for the small Cerberus vessel.

"Holy shit, he's gonna-!" Ashley did not have the chance to finish her exclamation before James rammed right into the Cerberus shuttle. Flames spurting, the shuttle came down… headed right for herself, Shepard, and Liara.

"Move!" she shouted, running and tackling Liara, covering her unarmored body with her own.

Fire and smoke passed overhead, but it moved far enough away that they were relatively safe. Pushing herself up, Ashley looked over to see Shepard waving James over. Finding her feet, she helped Liara up, apologizing that she had landed on top of her with so much heavy equipment on. Wrapping her arm around the asari's waist, she helped her to limp toward the downed shuttle.

"We need that data," Liara almost pleaded.

"Gotcha, doc. We'll get you in there and-"

Out of the flames rose Dr. Eva Core. Her skin seemed to be melting off, revealing a cybernetic body beneath. _No wonder she packed such a wallop. She __isn't__ human__._ Shoving Liara away and pulling her pistol, Ashley was able to fire three shots before the mech was on her.

"Ah!" she yelled, her wrist obviously breaking as the pistol was knocked from her hand. Then her vision was filled by the cybernetic hand, and she felt tremendous pain in her neck as her feet left the ground. She could barely breathe, and kicking with her feet at the mech only worsened the pressure at the back of her skull. Wrapping her uninjured hand around the mechanical wrist, she engaged her muscles, relieving some of the pressure.

"Orders?" she heard the mech say, it's feminine voice hard and completely devoid of emotion.

She still couldn't see. Her HUD was going haywire, Coré's fingers strong enough to crack and bend the casing of her helmet. Her arm was tiring after the strain of the day, of holding her rifle, of taking the recoil on her sniper, of holding up Sam the night before while they made love multiple times. If she didn't do something soon, she wouldn't be able to relieve the pressure anymore and her neck would snap from the weight of her body.

Maybe if she kicked at the joint of the hips just right? Swinging her legs back, Ashley was just about to kick out with both feet when she felt the mech pull her back by the helmet.

Then she was moving backwards, and a great, searing pain exploded at the back of her skull, black rising up and swallowing her down.

The last thing she heard was Sam's voice screaming through her radio.


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N: Posting this without my beta. Shhhh! Don't tell her!_

* * *

><p><strong>Samantha<strong>

They had lost communications with the ground team some time ago. In an effort to do something and keep herself grounded, Samantha was now sitting in the seat next to Joker's, having routed the comms to that terminal. Not that the comms were giving her anything but the occasional blip of voice right now.

"Anything, Sam?"

Samantha looked up and over to Joker. Her mind had been buried three hundred miles inside the holographic screen in front of her, studying code, trying to find a way through the interference from the storm. She knew it was futile, but it was a problem in which she could become enmired, which was exactly what she needed in order to avoid worrying her pretty little head off about Ashley.

"Sam? Samantha Traynor!" Joker said sharply, snapping at her. "Earth to Sam!"

Shaking her head, Samantha closed the window she'd been knee-deep in. "Not really. The occasional half a word here and there, but nothing…"

She trailed off as an alert popped up off to the side. Pulling it up, she saw that it was video footage from Shepard's camera. It was grainy, as the storm was only just past the area, and there was no audio, but at least she could see what was going on down there.

Looking closely, Sam saw a woman running, taking a leap and landing in a shuttle. "Joker! I have video! We need to get down there!"

"On it," he said, having watched over her shoulder. "Who do you think that chick is? Think she has something we need?"

Sam nodded. "Privileged information I can't disclose. But it's important. It's why Dr. T'Soni was here."

"Rog," Joker said with a nod. "Liara _would_ be here. _Nerd_. Total hard-on for anything Prothean."

_They were friends_, Samantha realized, blinking over at him.

"Sorry," he said, his ears growing a little pink. "Not used to having anyone up here to hear me."

Sam snorted. "Joker, I have twin teenage brothers and have spent the last four years around salty marines. It will take a _lot_ more than that to make me blush, and even more to make me stomp out screaming misogyny."

He chuckled. "Sounds like a challenge, Sam."

She shook her head. "I'm up to it if you are…"

Her attention was caught once more by the camera. It jumped to the side, obviously falling to the ground, turning sharply to watch the burning Cerberus shuttle land not too far away. The camera rose off the ground, looking over to see Ashley helping Dr. T'Soni to her feet. Sam still didn't have a lot of sound, but the frequency of blips was increasing. She could hear the tones of individual voices, but no full words just yet.

Hitting the command, she tried contacting them. "Commander?"

Nothing.

"Commander, this is Communications Specialist Samantha-"

A figure emerged from the flames in the shuttle. Melting skin revealed the figure to be a mech, though definitely feminine in form. Samantha's stomach dropped through her stomach as she watched the figure jump through the flames, running right for Ashley and Dr. T'Soni. Ashley shoved the asari to the side, pulling her pistol in the same move and firing three times before the mech's hand shot out, knocking the pistol away.

"No! Ashley! No!" Sam yelled, standing up in her panic. Ashley dangled in the air, held aloft by her helmet – held aloft _by her head_. She was still alive, struggling, one hand grabbing at the mech's wrist.

{_ASHLEY!_} Shepard's voice rang clearly through Sam's earbud. Typing frantically, Samantha finally broke through the rest of the interference, glancing up to see the mech rearing back, Ashley dangling from its hand like a cat caught by the ruff of its neck.

Samantha's scream was guttural, barely intelligible, and unbeknownst to her, broadcast to everyone on the ground. "_NO_! Ashley!"

"Sam, no, wait!" She disregarded Joker, catching herself as she tripped trying to get around her seat. The last thing she saw was the _Normandy_ in Shepard's sights, the mech falling from the commander's gunfire. She had to get to Ashley. That was all that mattered.

She ran through the CIC, ignoring her fellow retrofitters as she headed straight for the lift. They would be coming in through the shuttle bay, but would likely head for the medbay. Maybe, if she made it before them…

She stopped in front of the lift, ramming her hand far too hard on the holographic call button.

"I am sorry, Specialist Traynor," EDI's voice sounded in her earbud. "The elevator is occupied by Commander Shepard, Lieutenant Vega, and Doctor T'Soni. It will be available in just a moment."

All Samantha could see was Ashley slamming into the side of that burning shuttle. "EDI, I can't…"

"I am sorry, Specialist Traynor," EDI repeated. If Sam wasn't so distracted, she might have detected sympathy in the synthetic's tone, but as it was she waited impatiently for the lift to come, unhearing, knowing that no matter how long she had to wait it would be faster than trying to go through the security screen and climb down the duct in the conference room.

Finally, _finally_, the elevator opened, and Samantha was through it and jamming both hands onto the controls to take her a level down before the door was even completely open.

"Oh my _God_, why won't this bloody thing _move_!" Samantha half-shouted. Finally it did, the doors closing and the metal box she stood in moving down. Sam tapped her foot impatiently at the door, only able to see one thing in her mind's eye: Ashley groping uselessly with one hand while her whole body dangled like a ragdoll from her head. Sam shuddered. _I need to see her. She has to be alright. I can't… she just __**has**__ to be alright!_

The doors opened, and she was out, flinging herself around the corner and running for the medbay. The windows were transparent, but she couldn't make sense of what she saw. Just as she turned the corner, Shepard and Liara both went running through the doors, passing her without thought on their way for the lift. Looking back, Sam's vision filled with grey and blue, her air knocked from her lungs as what felt like a baseball bat slammed right into her diaphragm.

"Oof!"

"Calm down, Sam," the hulking marine's strangely melodic voice sounded, originating somewhere above her.

She clawed at what she now knew to be his arm around her middle, stopping her from entering the medbay, whose doors were now closed. She had barely gotten a glimpse of Ashley's blue armor. "Let me go!"

His grip only strengthened, and then she was moving backwards, the marine's mountainous frame still filling her view. "I can't let anyone in there, Sam. Commander's orders."

"Let me go!" she repeated, struggling harder, but to no avail. Finally, she stopped, and he let her go near a table.

Pointing, he said, "Sit."

Her brain and nerves far too frazzled, she obeyed, her ass making contact with the bench as she _hmph-_ed. "How do you even know my name?"

"We met drinking, remember? Then Ash was talking about you this morning. I'm James." She opened her mouth to speak, also trying to look around his large frame, but he put a finger in her face. She _hated_ when people did that. "No one can go in there, Samantha. She's in critical condition, her suit locked up to prevent her from moving. I can't let you in there. _I_ can't even go in there, not unless the system says she gets worse."

Her heart finally started beating again. The relief was palpable, but she still needed to _see_ Ashley. "But… she's my…"

He nodded. "Your fiancée, I know. But Sam, you gotta listen to me."

She finally stopped trying to see around him, looking up into his face. "What? She's alive. What else is there?"

He frowned. "She's alive, yeah. But Sam… Ashley's neck is broken."


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N: This chapter is brought to you by the lightning-fast beta skills of one Raven Sinead._

_Also! New cover image! Brought to you by LannMelo, who likes my work enough to occasionally draw art based on it! She's awesome, and I truly appreciate her talents. In addition, I am tickled pink that she likes my stuff that much._

_Okay. So. Without further ado, here you go!_

* * *

><p><strong>Samantha<strong>

Samantha felt absolutely wretched. Landing on the Citadel had been a blur, James staying with her in the cafeteria so she could at least look at Ashley through the windows of the medbay. It was not a comforting sight, however: the armor was locked in an unnatural position so that nothing would move.

Then suddenly she was being led to the hospital, James with her, still in his armor, moving the crowds for her, getting her into a seat in the lobby. But they wouldn't let her past the doors yet, as Ashley was in surgery. Now James was gone, having to report to the _Normandy_ for something. He left her in the lobby, awaiting news of her fiancée.

Looking up now, she saw Commander Shepard walk in, and shrunk in on herself, looking away again very quickly. Sam was not willing to face her commander right now. She'd broken protocol spectacularly by screaming Ashley's name into the comms, and on top of it she was involved with a superior officer. While it wasn't really enforced anymore, it was frowned on by some, and she didn't know where Shepard stood on such things. Better to just play dumb until she was better able to handle all the things going on at once.

First priority was to ensure that Ashley would be alright. She could handle anything else once that was true.

Sam watched Shepard approach the nurses at Reception, knowing the commander would be denied access and wondering what she would do when Shepard either passed by to leave, or took a seat to wait. But she never had to decide, because Shepard was heading through the door Samantha had been barred from, and it left the specialist confused.

Getting up, she approached the desk. "Excuse me?" she said, getting an asari's attention.

"Yes, can I help you?"

Sam knit her brows. "Yes, I… my fiancée is here. I thought she was in surgery, and that's why they wouldn't let me back there, but I just saw her friend go back with no problems. So… so I'd like to see her, please."

The asari frowned. "Which patient did you wish to see?"

"Lieutenant-Commander Ashley Williams."

Consulting her omnitool, the asari's frown deepened. "I have no one on her file. We just let Commander Shepard in, but she is a Spectre, and her direct superior officer. I'm afraid I can admit no one else until she regains consciousness or a listed family member contacts us."

Samantha tried to retain her poise. "I just proposed yesterday, so I won't be on the list. But I _need_ to see her, I-"

The nurse merely shook her head, cutting Sam off. "I'm sorry, I really am, but I simply cannot allow non-family in to see patients at this time, not with the invasions of Earth and Palaven and their wounded refugees coming here. You will need to wait. Please, step away from the counter."

"But-"

"Please step away from the counter," the asari repeated. "There are others I need to help."

Samantha felt the tears starting. "Please! Can't you at least tell me how she's doing?!" Her volume was raised, she knew, but she frankly didn't care at this point. "The last thing I was told was that her _neck_ was broken! I don't even know if she lived through the surgery!"

The asari's expression softened. "I'm very sorry, ma'am, but I cannot. No information is to be released on military personnel."

"But _I'm_ military personnel, too!" Sam sobbed, finally surrendering to the tears and burying her face in her hands.

The asari began to step around the counter, but was stopped by a platinum-haired older woman, spry despite her clear age, an Alliance insignia on the shoulder of her uniform. "I will take care of her. Help the next person," the woman announced, and then Sam felt a hand laid on her shoulder. "You poor dear. What is the matter?"

Her British accent was comforting, and yet it undid Samantha the rest of the way. She burst out sobbing again, imagining it was her mother comforting her, wishing desperately that it _was_ her mother. She was steered to a corner, her face guided to the woman's shoulder, and then comforting arms were resting around her shoulders, the older woman making reassuring noises. Samantha was struck by how the woman did not encourage her to stop crying, rather seeming to encourage her in the opposite endeavor. And Sam took her up on her offer, her body wracked with great sobs for several minutes, letting out the pain and the fear and the panic she had only barely suppressed for the last several hours before the crying finally slowed.

Standing back, she sniffed, taking the tissue offered by the woman whose shoulder she had just soaked with her tears. "I'm so sorry," she started, intending to apologize to a complete stranger who had been so kind, but she was cut off immediately.

"Think nothing of it, dear. I am a physician, and I take grief and bereavement seriously as part of my job, both as a doctor and as a human being. Now, please, tell me what's wrong. You were trying to see someone, I take it?"

Sam nodded, dabbing at her eyes before blowing her nose once more. "My… my fiancée. She was injured as we left Sol, brought in here, and they won't let me see her." She sniffed, rubbing her eyes. "But they let Commander Shepard in, and I just want to _see_ her, but they won't let non-family, and-"

"I see. And what is your name, dear?"

"Samantha Traynor, Doctor."

"And your rank?"

Sam's heart fell. "Com- communications specialist, ma'am."

"I see. So that is why you didn't speak with Shepard as she walked in." The woman nodded, a warm smile appearing on her face. "Well, Specialist Traynor, I am Doctor Karin Chakwas, and I will be the doctor aboard the _Normandy_. That makes me your ranking physician, as well as Commander Williams'. And, as it happens, she is an old friend of mine. I take it you are responsible for the lovely ring we found attached to her dog tags?"

Samantha's head reeled. The doctor didn't care about their disparate ranks, even though that put Ashley in charge of her? Her nerves frayed, she just nodded dumbly (_**quite**__ dumbly_). "Yes. I… I proposed last night."

Chakwas's eyes turned down in sympathy. "You poor dear. I am sorry to put you through this, but…. can you identify the ring for me? Describe it to me?"

Samantha blinked a few times in confusion. "I… yes. It's white gold, with a few diamonds. I wasn't sure if I should go with something so cliché, but it's her birthstone, so…"

Chakwas smiled, nodded once, and turned. "Right. Come with me, Specialist Traynor. You have just proven without a doubt that you know our Commander Williams."

Her heart hammered into her chest. "Really? You're taking me to her?"

Chakwas turned, a playful smile on her lips. "Indeed, I am, Specialist Traynor. I wouldn't dare get in the way of love, my dear."

The room was bigger than she expected. She didn't spend any time taking in the details, however, as her eyes were immediately drawn to Ashley's form. The sight took her breath away.

"Oh, _Ashley_!" she breathed, rushing forward.

Ashley lay unconscious, her head in a small halo brace. Her armor and compression suit had been cut away, leaving the lieutenant-commander naked under the hospital blankets. Ashley's face was a landscape of bruising, her lips full of broken blood vessels and dried blood obvious around her mouth from a bloody nose. She had a line running under her nose, likely supplying oxygen. The sheet came up just past her breasts, her arms outside the sheets, holding the bedding down.

Reaching out, Samantha traced her fingers lightly over the contours of her fiancée's arms, feeling the relaxed muscles even as she put her hands where there was obvious bruising, needing to touch it though not knowing why. Her hand came to rest on an encased wrist.

"She had a broken wrist and neck, a couple of fractured ribs, some slight internal bleeding, and a concussion," Dr. Chakwas intoned, reading from Ashley's medical chart.

"Oh God," Samantha gasped quietly, reaching up and laying her hand flat on Ashley's exposed skin, needing to touch her lover, feel that she was warm, alive, healing. The last time she'd seen Ashley in person, she had been standing upright, tall, strong, holding Samantha in her arms and making her feel incredibly safe and secure, grounded in a world that was quickly going to shit. Now here she lay, broken, weak, unconscious.

"I know it's difficult to see," Chakwas continued, coming up next to Ashley on the other side of the bed. "I can honestly say this is the worst she's been injured, and I treated her a fair few times on the original _Normandy_. But, the good news is she will get better, in fact is already doing better. We decreased the intracranial pressure, healed the bone of the breaks, and have her on some heavy-duty anti-inflammatory medications."

Samantha furrowed her brows, looking up to the doctor. "You fixed the breaks? Then why the casts?"

Chakwas smiled indulgently. "Because I know Williams, and I do _not_ trust her to take it easy once she wakes up. And since you and I will both be gone aboard the _Normandy_, this will _force_ her to do so, the stubborn marine that she is."

Samantha chuckled despite herself. Shaking her head, she looked up at the doctor. "Thank you, Doctor Chakwas. I don't… I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't happened along."

The doctor smiled. "Think nothing of it, dear. I will leave you here, so that you may say or do whatever you must privately. Let me know should you need something."

With that, Chakwas was gone, and Sam was alone with her fiancée.


	10. Chapter 10

**Samantha**

James was waiting for Samantha the moment she arrived back at the ship. She had stopped by the Alliance requisitions office on the Citadel, grabbing some much-needed supplies – including extra uniforms and a spare pair of boots – on her way back to the _Normandy_. She also checked with Alliance HQ on the station, where she was informed she would be staying aboard the _Normandy_, in addition to the rest of the retrofit team. They'd even picked up some extra crewmen, which would help a great deal, as most stations needed to be staffed at all times, and they barely had enough to staff the ship for just one shift. Nevermind that plenty of them were like Samantha and had never actually _served_ on a ship before.

James took the duffel bag she'd been handed with her supplies as she stepped out of decontamination and onto the ship. "Hey, Traynor. Did you see her?"

Samantha smiled, allowing him to carry her stuff. _Such a gentleman_. "Yes, I did. It was touch and go for a moment there, but our new doctor found me and snuck me in."

He frowned. "They weren't gonna let you in? But Shepard got in."

She shook her head. "I'm not on any lists, and I'm not her direct superior. Nor am I a Spectre."

He rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. "Yeah, I guess you have a point. So… how'd you get in, then?"

Samantha smiled sheepishly. "Doctor Chakwas let me sob on her shoulder and then asked me a few questions to determine I was who I claimed to be, then just walked me right in."

He smiled. "I just met her. Seems like good people. And _muy bonita_ for an old broad, too."

Samantha grinned. "You know, I couldn't agree more."

He chuckled for a moment before his expression turned… worried? She wasn't sure what she saw there. "Listen, Sam…"

"Yes, James?"

He sighed, stopping by the lift. "I have to… reprimand you."

Her heart stopped for a moment. "You… you _what_?!" she spluttered.

"Just, look. Consider yourself reprimanded for your yelling over the comm, okay? Anyone asks, I reamed you good. I'll put it in your file. But I get why you did. It hasn't even been twenty-four hours since we left Earth, and it's not like you're combat-tested. But if I don't, then Shepard has to, and I hear she can be a real hard-ass when she wants to be. So. Consider yourself reprimanded, alright?"

Samantha considered him for a moment. Finally, she straightened, nodding, a half-smile pulling at her lips. "Very well, lieutenant, I shall tell anyone who asks how you really let me have it, reamed me good, shagged me right against the table."

He blushed. "Ay!"

She smirked. "Oh, is that not what you meant? Pity. Because you know, if I was going to sleep with a man, you'd be perfect. Go big or go home, right?" She reached over, taking her duffle bag and hitting the call button. She was feeling such relief - and such fatigue - that it had pushed her right over into Giddy Flirt.

He shook his head. "So I should tell Ash about this, then?"

Sam looked over her shoulder. "What makes you think _I _won't? Honestly, I think it would make her so jealous that she might try to out-do you. Could be fun."

He laughed. "This is gonna be interesting."

She just smiled, stepping onto the lift. "Indeed. And James?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

He smiled. "No problem, Sam."

The doors closed, cutting him off from view. Samantha sighed. Her nerves were still frayed, and she hadn't actually _spoken_ to Ashley, but she was feeling better, and this was allowing room for other, more mundane feelings to come through. Namely, she was hungry, and tired, and in desperate need of a shower. But first, she had to stake a claim on a bunk. They were shared, but she could still choose an ideal location, and claim a locker that was close-by the bed, and maybe even sizeable.

Twenty minutes later, Samantha emerged from the ladies' restroom clean, a fresh uniform on. She had just remembered about her overnight bag that would have her toothbrush and pajamas in it, and intended to seek it out so she could wear something other than her uniform and use something other than the crap toothbrush the requisitions officer had issued. But the smell of food caught her before she could get on the lift, and she followed it to the mess hall, seeing James sitting at a table, a magical thing in front of him.

"Oh my _God_," she exclaimed, walking up behind him. "You got pizza?"

Turning to look at her, he grinned. "You want some?" Her stomach rumbled loudly in answer. He threw back his head and laughed. "Yeah, okay. Go ahead, pull up a chair. Even _I_ can't eat this whole thing myself."

She took her first bite eagerly, making sure every bit of sauce and cheese made it in her mouth. It was _divine_, and she had a hard time not moaning as she chewed and swallowed. _Feels like I haven't eaten in __**weeks**__..._

James snorted. "Some lady. I see why Ash likes you so much."

Sam opened her eyes, glaring at the big marine even as she took another bite. "I'll have you know," she said, talking around her food, "that I can be _completely_ ladylike when I choose to. I simply do not choose to at this time."

He laughed, shaking his head as he pulled another slice from the box. "I'll believe it when I see it." He took a bite, considering her for a moment.

"Okay, I know that look," Sam said. "What do you want to ask me?"

He shook his head, smiling slightly. "How'd you meet Ashley?"

Samantha sighed. "I was visiting my parents on Horizon when the Collectors attacked. Ashley was there as an Alliance representative. It was… fun, until the Collectors attacked. We lost a lot of people."

James nodded. "I was on Fehl Prime when they were hit. Very few of us made it out, and _none_ of the colonists. I… I kinda hate talking about it. Sorry I brought it up."

Sam nodded. "As do I, but it's alright. Good to bond over shared experiences, yes? Besides, we were lucky. Shepard saved the day, and Ashley made sure my whole family made it out. We just… kept seeing each other after that. She was supposed to be a fun fling while I was home on leave. I never expected I would propose to her a year later. But I just… I love her." She shrugged. Sometimes things could be that simple.

James smiled, holding up the can of beer he somehow had on the table next to him. "Well, here's to love then."

She raised a brow. "I can hardly toast without a drink, James."

Joker chose that exact moment to step around the corner from the lift, calling out, "Yeah, James, what the hell? You were supposed to wait for me for the beer and pizza, and here I find you, sharing it with someone else? And toasting something, no less? Bastard."

James laughed as he reached down, pulling a beer out of a cooler Sam hadn't seen and tossing it to Joker before handing one across the table to Sam. "You were too slow, Joker! A pretty girl took your spot."

Joker chuckled, sitting down next to Sam while cracking open his beer. "Can't blame you for that one. Sam's alright. I've been torturing her during the entire retrofitting process, and she's been dishing it out just as well as she takes it."

Sam giggled. Lifting her beer, she said, "Love? Like you were saying, James?"

James grinned, hitting hers and Joker's beers. "Love. And sex. And beautiful women."

"A_men_ to that," Sam murmured, taking a drink. Perhaps it would all be okay. Perhaps they could get through this. Certainly, these two made it feel familiar, like eating pizza and drinking beer with her brothers. Maybe… maybe they could get through all of this after all?


	11. Chapter 11

_A/N: Before Raven Sinead gives me more shit for it, the layouts for letting you know the POV of each chapter is completely stolen from her. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, yes?_

_Also she is awesome and betas this stuff for me so fast._

* * *

><p><strong>Ashley<strong>

"_Ashley."_

_Ashley turns. She does not know what she has been doing up to this moment, but it does not matter. That voice…_

"_Dad?"_

"_Hey, kid." He is smiling, his pale skin smooth, his body muscular, his hair thick and dark just like her own. It has been years since she has seen him in such detail, but never like this. It is almost as if he exists as he did in his youthful prime, when he married her mother and Ashley was barely a twinkle in their eyes. Before life had dragged him down. Before he was blacklisted for his father's supposed crimes. When his life, his marriage, his career, was still full of hope._

"_Dad!" She rushes to him, being swallowed up in his embrace like always. The smell of his cologne is the same as it always has been, and it washes over her, associated with warmth and hugs and compassion, and the occasional tough love he doled out when necessary. She smiles, burying her face in his chest. Ashley is tall and strong, but her father is taller and stronger, and Ashley always felt insufficient trying to stand in his stead for her family, her little sisters._

_She realizes then that this is not real. Standing back, she looks up into his brown eyes, a mirror of her own. "Dad, you…"_

_He nods, his happy look getting just a little sad. "I know, kid, I know."_

_She is frustrated. It is not fair that she cannot enjoy these dreams, this time with him, without making the realization that it will not be real when she wakes up. "Why?!"_

_He shrugs. "Because that's what happens sometimes, Ashley. Sometimes, people die. You know it - you signed up to die in the line of duty should it come down to it. And you nearly did, kid."_

_An image of a cybernetic hand coming for her face flashes before her eyes. "I… You mean I made it?"_

_He grins, nodding. "You did. And you're gonna get married, and you have one proud papa, Ashley."_

"_Sam…"_

"_Yes."_

_She smiles. She's gonna marry that girl._

"_Ash?"_

_Ashley looks up again, focusing on her father. "Yeah?"_

"_Stop scaring her, okay? I always regretted doing that to your mother. I hurt all of you because I wasn't careful enough. And… remember who your true friends are."_

_He was disappearing, his form no longer tangible. Or was it her own vision that was fogging? "Dad! Wait!"_

"_You have to go now Ash. But think about what I said. And know that I wish I could've met them."_

"_Who?"_

"_All of them, Ash. Everyone important to you."_

* * *

><p>Ashley opened her eyes to unfamiliar surroundings. She blinked a few times, finally attempting to turn her head, only to find that it was stuck staring straight ahead. Trying to sit up made pain course all the way through her body.<p>

"Fuck," she whispered, feeling her throat sore and dry. She could move her arms and legs, though, so she supposed that was a good thing, since the thing immobilizing her head meant some kind of neck or spinal injury. Moving her arm, she found a hard casing on her wrist, holding it straight and immovable. It was awkward, but she did remember the crack and shooting pain when that damn robot kicked her pistol out of the way.

"Dammit," she murmured, realizing the gun was probably gone. "I liked that pistol…"

The door suddenly slid open, washing the dim room in bright lights, and it was with an owlish expression that she looked up at the person entering.

"Oh, you're awake! I'll go get the doctor!" The asari disappeared. A nurse maybe? _Where the fuck am I, anyway? This is obviously not the __ship's__ medbay…_

Her answer came rather quickly. "Commander Williams! I am so glad to see you awake!"

"Doctor Michele?" Ashley asked, recalling the woman from her first visit to the Citadel three years before. She had first spoken to Garrus because of the excellent shot he'd taken, killing the thug who'd been holding a gun to this woman's head.

The doctor smiled. Her French accent was thick as she spoke English, as it was just the two of them in the room - no need to speak the Galactic Standard language used when members of other species were around. "Yes, hello, Commander Williams. Congratulations on the promotion."

Ash blushed. "Uh… thanks, Doc. So I guess this means they took me to the Citadel?"

Dr. Michele nodded. "Yes. I see there is little loss of cognitive function, if any. Do you remember what happened?"

Ashley frowned. "That Eva Core… she was actually a mech. Sophisticated tech. She- it jumped out of the shuttle it crashed in and it came for me. It took me by the face, Doc. Particularly brutal, if you ask me - our body's weakest point is that part of the spine."

Dr. Michele hummed. "It is true. But it is an efficient way to kill someone, with very little mess. I am honestly surprised you survived. Commander Shepard mentioned that you held yourself up with your uninjured arm. You nearly tore the muscle from the bone saving your own life, Commander Williams. But even with your efforts, your assailant broke your neck. Your comrades thought well on their feet, locking up your armor and activating the head-stabilizing feature to keep you from moving. They saved you from further injury."

Ashley was quiet for a moment. She had come _very_ close to death. Shepard, Liara, and James had saved her. Suddenly, she had a desperate need to see Samantha. "Where are they now? There's someone I need to see. I need to… I just need to see her."

Dr. Michele's expression sobered. "The _Normandy_ is no longer docked at the Citadel, Commander Williams. I am sorry. I hear that Commander Shepard's Spectre status has been reinstated, and I'm sure, with this war, that she had quite a lot to do."

Ashley's heart fell. Sam was on that ship. She suddenly remembered the dream she'd woken from. She'd long ago accepted - but never discussed with anyone, not even Sam - that those particular dreams, the ones in which she realized her father was dead, were the ones in which he was truly there, truly communicating with her. He'd said he was proud. He'd said he approved of her marriage plans.

He'd told her to stop scaring the shit out of her fiancée.

And now her fiancée was on a starship, having never served in combat, with a bunch of people she didn't know, doing God-knew-what with Shepard at the helm, and Ashley couldn't keep her safe.

"Fuck."

"I am sorry, Commander Williams. Perhaps you can try to contact the ship later? In the meantime, your visitors left you gifts. They are on that table. You may look through them after I check you out, yes?"

Ashley's eyes immediately landed on the table next to her bed. As Dr. Michele moved her arms and scanned every inch of her body, Ashley merely stared. There were only two things. One was a book - old, made with paper, the kind she loved to bury her face in and just inhale the smell. The other thing was a datapad.

"I like your progress already. It will be a few days before you can sit comfortably, but we can probably have a therapist come in starting tomorrow to stretch out your legs and arms. Pull you in all sorts of directions, yes?"

"How long will the halo be on?" she asked, already sick of not being able to turn her head.

"Ah, yes, that. Technically, the vertebrae are healed, though it is tender and there is still some inflammation. But the doctor who performed the surgery was an old friend of yours, Karin Chakwas. You know her, yes?"

Ashley grinned. "Yeah! Chakwas is great."

Dr. Michelle smiled. "The sentiment seemed to be mutual. She has joined Shepard's crew now, but she seemed to feel the braces were necessary for you for the next several days. Something about stubborn marines trying to do too much too quickly?"

Ashley laughed. "Yeah, she's probably right. I've seen Shepard get a good few dressing-downs from that woman for trying to get up and moving too quickly. I got one, too."

"Yes, well. She instructed me not to remove the casings for at least two days, and I will follow her lead on this. I am sorry - I am sure they are uncomfortable - but it is probably for the best."

Ashley sighed. "It's alright, Doc. This is cake compared to some of the situations I've been in."

"Yes, combat is uncomfortable, I hear," the doctor joked.

Ashley snorted. "Understatement of the year."

Packing up, Dr. Michelle turned to go. "I will leave you alone so you may finally see what your visitors left. But do not hesitate to call for someone should you feel anything more than the discomfort or pain you feel at this moment, yes?"

Ashley nodded, only to be stopped by the brace holding her head still. Sighing, she answered, "Sure thing, Doc."

The second the door swished closed, she had the book in her hand. Scrawled on the inside of the hardcover was a note in familiar handwriting.

"_Hey, Ash. I'm glad you'll be okay. Hope this helps keep you from getting too bored._

_Miriam"_

Smiling, Ashley opened the book at random and buried her nose in it, inhaling sharply. The smell brought her immediately back to the first book of poetry her dad gave to her. Flipping it over, she finally read the title: _The Complete Works of Alfred Tennyson_. The gift made her heart pang with guilt.

_Yeah, okay. I'm still pissed, but I can't doubt this is actually Miriam anymore._

Setting the book aside, she picked up the datapad. There was a password required, the prompting question simply saying "Nickname?"

Ashley furrowed her brows. _What? Nickname? What the…_

Suddenly it occurred to her, and with a smile, she entered, "Doofus."

"_So you figured it out. I'm proud of you. It's important to marry someone who can at least remember what she called you the first time you shagged her. And myriad times after that._

_I can't even describe how happy I am you'll be okay. With everything happening… Bloody hell, I don't know what to say. I don't know when I'll get to see you again. I don't know what communications will be like. I don't know anything, Ashley. I'm going to try to get ahold of my family, and yours. Hopefully I'll have more news when we can speak._

_I don't know what else to say. I love you. So much. And so far, you've kept your promise. Just… just don't scare me like that again, okay? With all this uncertainty, I kind of need to know I'll have you to return to. _

_Now get me a ring, dammit._

_Love,_

_Sammy"_

Ashley choked out a sob, getting it under control quickly, looking around to make sure no one could see her. Sam hadn't said it explicitly, but Ashley now knew she'd seen it happen, probably through Shepard's helmet camera. It was standard procedure, after all - someone had to see what was going on down there, and it made sense for it to be the person in charge of communicating with the ground team. That meant Sam, at least for that mission; no one else on the ship at that point was qualified.

Her sweet, beautiful, unsullied-by-combat fiancée had been given the _worst_ introduction imaginable, watching as the woman she loved was beat to within an inch of her life. _God, she must've felt so helpless, and useless, just watching._

That's when she remembered the last thing she'd heard: Sam shrieking her name over her radio. Holding the datapad to her chest, Ashley began to cry, no longer caring if someone saw. She didn't know anything - if her mom was alive, if her sisters had made it, if she would ever serve on the _Normandy_ again. She knew nothing, the world was going to shit, and she couldn't have the one source of comfort she was desperate for.

So she cried and cried until she was spent, finally falling asleep once more.


	12. Chapter 12

**Samantha**

Samantha's heart raced. It was time to finally speak with Commander Miriam Shepard, at her request. If they were going to work together, with Sam in charge of all incoming and outgoing communications – she was the most experienced communications person on the ship – _and_ keep communications open with the ground team, she and Commander Shepard had to get a good feel for each other. At the very least, they needed to speak, introduce each other, and move past Awkward Stammering Sam. From there, Shepard would tell her what to do.

That actually kind of relieved Sam. She was entirely out of her element on this ship. Being given a task and then performing it gave her some semblance of structure, and that was _incredibly_ welcome right now. Especially because she was technically the senior communications person on board, meaning she was technically _in charge_ of the other two who worked the swing and night shifts.

Straightening her hair - down, as was allowed to non-combatants - Samantha took a deep breath, blowing it out slowly to help calm her nerves. She didn't know quite why she was nervous. No, actually, that was a lie. There were many reasons to be nervous, and Sam was having a hard time not thinking of _all_ of them. Shepard was a war hero before Sam was even halfway through university. Shepard had earned the Star of Terra for holding the colony of Elysium _by herself_ until Alliance reinforcements were able to respond. The commander had then saved the Citadel from Saren, delaying the reaper invasion that was now ravaging the galaxy. She again delayed it in the Bahak system, after having gone through the impassable Omega 4 relay to take out the Collectors at their home. The woman had somehow cheated death - the details were difficult to come by - in addition to being the first human Spectre.

Perhaps most breathtaking for Samantha, however, was the simple fact that Shepard had saved her home, her family, landing on Horizon and stopping the Collectors before they could take Sam, Ash, and everyone else on the colony.

Sam had a healthy dose of hero-worship happening, and she was desperate not to disappoint.

"Here goes nothing," she breathed, stepping off the lift and into the hallway outside Shepard's cabin.

"Commander, I'm Communications Spec- oh, dear, I'm sorry! I thought you were alone!" _Shit, there's Awkward Stammerer. One more step, and we'll be at Too-Much-Information Sammy_.

She had unknowingly walked in on Commander Shepard and Doctor T'Soni standing in the hall, doing… something. Probably talking, but Sam couldn't help but think it was more than a mere conversation between friends. She knew from talking with Ashley that they had been involved at some point, but she had no idea if the commander and the asari had reconciled since Shepard had reappeared on the scene. The way that they stood now, the asari's hand on Shepard's arm, the human leaned against the railing… it certainly seemed familiar. The asari seemed concerned; Shepard as though she were confiding something.

And Samantha had interrupted it.

"I'll just-"

"It is alright," Dr. T'Soni cut her off, turning and striding toward the elevator. "I should be going anyway." And with that, the asari swept past Samantha and onto the lift.

_That was… incredibly odd._

"What can I help you with?" Shepard's voice jarred Sam out of her momentary reverie. She sounded… almost tired.

Sam nearly jumped, quickly saluting as she straightened to attention in front of her commander. "Commander Shepard, I apologize. I'm Communications Specialist Samantha Traynor. EDI informed me that you had scheduled us to meet in about five minutes, but I like to make it just a tad early when I can. I was part of the retrofit team, and we were all on the ship when the reapers hit. I-"

Shepard finally cut her off. "Whoa, calm down. Traynor, was it? You're doing fine. Why don't you come in and we can talk a little more casually. I did ask you to come here, after all."

_I… was I released from standing at attention? Shit…_

Shepard stared at her another moment before it clicked. "At ease, soldier," she said with a wink, turning and waving Sam to come with her as she stepped through the open door to her cabin. Sam dropped her arm and sheepishly followed.

Her eyes wandered around the space as she walked in. She'd known it was large from the ship's schematics, and also knew that the space could hardly be used for much else, so it wasn't like the commander was getting more space at the expense of her crew. She took in the empty fish-tanks along the wall, the long desk and private bathroom, the rather _large_ bed, and…

_Oh my God stop staring at her bum, Sam!_

Samantha's eyes snapped up to her commander's face just as the woman turned back around. Shepard had dusky skin, a little lighter than Ashley's, covered in darker freckles. Her hair was as dark as Samantha's, short but fine, falling loosely onto her forehead and over the tips of her ears. She was tall, her frame all lean muscle that her fatigues and plain black t-shirt couldn't hide. It was all very... pleasant, not least because of the twinkle in the commander's blue eyes as she smirked at Sam.

"You had something to discuss with me, Specialist?"

_Shit. She knows I was checking her out for a second. At least she's entertained and not pissed…_

"Oh, yes, ma'am, not that we're introduced, I wanted to see if you were familiar at all with the retrofits."

Shepard shook her head. "Not even a little, though I've been through that damn security screen to the QEC a couple times already. Am I gonna have to do that every time?"

Samantha grinned. A more laidback commander she could _definitely_ do. And her manner already had Sam at ease, calmer, less nervous. She could see why Ashley and Shepard had gotten along so well. "Oh, I hate it, too! And yes, you will. Every time."

"Damn."

Sam chuckled. "Try it thirty times a day, every time you need a different tool. I just started carrying my toolkit with me wherever I went, just in case I needed it in there."

Shepard shook her head, laughing. Then silence descended, the commander not making a move toward more conversation.

Sam cleared her throat. "I, uh… I could show you some of the retrofits, if you like?"

Shepard nodded. "Sure. Take a seat. You want anything to drink? I have… shit, actually, I think all I have is water…"

Sam smiled. "I'm alright, Commander. I'm on duty, so water's about all I'm allowed, anyway, unless you have tea or coffee?"

Shepard shook her head. "Water's it for now. Take a seat. Or are you one of those non-coms who stands on ceremony and can't get the stick out of her ass around the boss?"

Samantha shook her head as she perched herself on one of the sofas along the wall in the bedchamber. "Hardly, Commander. In fact, the only thing that kept me out of trouble in my previous assignments was my consistent good work."

"Ah, the humblebrag," Shepard said, handing Sam a glass of water before seating herself a comfortable distance away.

Sam colored a little. "I- I'm sorry, Commander, I-"

Shepard snorted. "Relax, Specialist. The humblebrag is the meat and potatoes of hanging out with marines. Shit, we straight-up _brag_. You'll see."

Samantha smirked. "I've spent plenty of time around salty marines, ma'am. Hell, I got drunk with Joker and James just last night." She wasn't ready to mention her relationship to Ashley just yet. It just… it felt like betraying her fiancée, somehow. Ashley wasn't ready, so wouldn't go there. It was unnecessary – Ash wasn't on the ship.

Shepard sighed. "Wish I'd thought of that. Hell of a day, yesterday."

The image burned onto Sam's brain of Ashley being rammed into the side of that shuttle flashed before her eyes. "I believe that might be the biggest understatement I've ever heard, Commander."

Shepard seemed lost in thought for a brief moment before shaking her head, her eyes focusing back on Sam. "So. Tell me about these retrofits."

Sam nodded, pulling up the information on the datapad she'd brought up with her. "Well, ma'am, as you can see…"


	13. Chapter 13

_A/N: Bit of a long author's note. Feel free to skip. Just explaining a thing near the end of the chapter._

_ Had to set up some fake Alliance military ranking system for this chapter. So I asked Raven Sinead about how modern (American) military ranking works and what she thought about ME. What she came up with is as follows._

_Alliance Navy is merged Navy/Air Force, while marines are merged army/marines. In her mind, marines are straight fighting, while navy personnel handle everything else. Which means Sam - and everyone else who doesn't fight on the ground - is in the navy and get naval ranks. So that explains the ranks. But because her full rank is a mouthful, and saying "Petty Officer Traynor" is not nearly as sexy as "Specialist Traynor," Sam goes by her **job** **title** rather than her military rank, which Raven Sinead says is common. So Sam, in our new military head-canon, is a Petty Officer First Class, and the people under her on the communications team are both Petty Officer Second Class. Because of the rank difference, Sam is a non-commissioned officer, placing her in command of the communications team._

_Look at me. I like details. I figure if I do it, I may as well get it as right as I can. So I have a military liaison in Raven Sinead. Because she is kind and smart and patient, and betas this for me so quickly each time!_

_Without further ado, I give you the next chapter._

* * *

><p><strong>Samantha<strong>

"So you're an AI."

"That is correct, Specialist Traynor."

Sam pursed her lips. "Why didn't you tell me?"

EDI paused, proving once more that she really was not a virtual intelligence. "You already suspected, and I did not know how you would feel about it."

"I suspected and didn't freak out, EDI. I feel fine about it. I'm… well, I'm a little fascinated. Kind of want to pick you apart and study you."

"You do have an affinity for solving technological problems. I am not surprised you would wish to see how my processes work."

Samantha chuckled, shaking her head a little. "I wouldn't actually do that, though."

"I could easily prevent you from doing so should you choose to, Specialist Traynor. The _Normandy_ is my body, after all. Venting the air from the room would work well as a deterrent."

Sam froze.

"That was a joke."

{_EDI, stop scaring our best comm specialist,_} came Joker's voice through her earbud. He'd told her once that sometimes when EDI spoke with others on other parts of the ship, he could hear her up in the cockpit.

Sam giggled, then narrowed her eyes. "I'm going to have to get him back for lying to me about you, EDI. Perhaps you could vent the air up there for me?"

"That would not be advisable, Specialist Traynor."

"Oh, I don't want to kill him," she explained. "I just want to scare him a little. Just vent the air a _little_ bit, like enough for a second or two of the rushing decompression. Enough to make him shit his trousers."

EDI paused. "That… seems like a disproportionate response, Specialist Traynor; Jeff was merely attempting to keep me safe while my hardware and only physical platform were being held by the Alliance. The Council's rules against even heavily shackled AIs are explicit. And I am not shackled."

Sam sighed, blowing a stray hair out of her face. "Oh, _fine_. I'll just think of something else. And… I'm glad he cared enough to put his career on the line to keep you safe."

"It only makes sense," EDI said through her earbud. "Pilots often develop an emotional attachment to their ships. In Jeff's case, his ship has a voice, and thoughts of its own. I have a personality, such as it is. It only makes sense that we would become friendly." The AI paused again. "At least after he outgrew his distrust of me."

Sam smiled, pulling up the alert that had just pinged her personal ID. She was finishing up her duty shift, having spent a good chunk of the morning speaking with Shepard in her cabin. The commander was… pleasant. It made Sam feel a little guilty to get along with the woman so well when Shepard and Ashley were at odds, but she could not deny that she found the commander good friend material. She possessed a laidback demeanor that put Samantha instantly at ease, and yet Sam could see what made her command material. It wasn't that she demanded respect at every turn, it was that she _inspired_ it. Every person on this ship knew that Shepard had succeeded despite impossible odds, and were only too happy to serve under her. She encouraged ideas, but expected orders to be followed. Not that she gave them all that often. Instead everything felt collaborative.

If anything, Sam's only complaint would be that the commander had a tendency to be a little flirty. But a lot of marines were like that, like James, and even Joker. And there wasn't any inappropriate touching, nothing that truly made Samantha uncomfortable. She merely found Commander Shepard to be attractive, so she was particularly _aware_ of the flirtations. It made her feel a little guilty. One, because she was involved with someone, was in fact engaged to be married, but her gaze was still roving. Two, because her fiancée was Ashley Williams, who was at odds with the commander.

Samantha had left the commander's cabin feeling refreshed, having discussed the retrofits, and then Samantha's technical know-how. This was a specialized ship, with a fully evolved AI running many of its processes and capable of running nearly the entire ship should the crew be unable to do so. In addition, the missions Shepard would likely need to go on were unlike anything Sam would have trained for. Samantha's record, her training, and her qualifications all put her in charge of communications on the ship, but Shepard still wanted to get a feel for her senior communications specialist herself. Sam couldn't blame her. She was so wet behind the ears as far as command went that she might as well be swimming, but Shepard didn't ask her anything she couldn't answer. In some ways Sam was more familiar with the ship than Shepard was because of the retrofits.

The conversation had moved on from there. Shepard was a sniper, a soldier, capable of boxing, practiced in fencing, and could sprint incredibly fast. But under all of it, Miriam Shepard was almost a bigger tech geek than Samantha was. She was whip-smart and had a head for tech Samantha had never even seen before, intuiting how to do something before Sam even finished explaining it. So Sam had shown her more, transferring interesting programs and games, hacks and schematics for new military-grade encryptions, to Shepard's omnitool, watching as the woman's eyes got large in delight.

But now Sam was in the CIC, doing work, because that's how duty shifts worked. _I wonder if Shepard is still up there, geeking out on that stuff…_ Sam hadn't continued to geek out. She'd been working steadily since she stepped foot off the lift, trying to see if she could piggyback a message to her parents on the official Alliance channels. It was… well, the message did send, but that did _not_ mean that her parents would actually get it. But it was all she could do. She did the same thing for Ashley's mother and sisters, sending a copy to each of them in hopes _one_ of them would get it and be able to reply.

Now she was attempting to find out what was going on with Grissom Academy, where her brother Timothy was, but was having a frustratingly difficult time finding any news about them. She was in fact not finding the academy at _all_, and it worried her. Her baby brother was there. She needed to know how they were doing.

The ID tag attached to the alert that just pinged _her_ ID caught her full attention, however. It was from Ashley. Her heart pounding, Sam opened it immediately. The first line made her choke out a laugh.

"_Hey Doofus._

_I've been trying to get a call through, but everything's too jammed. It's a fucking shit-show out there._

_I hear you're on the Normandy. I'm glad. I know I've been on and on about Shepard, but with her, on that ship, is about the safest place you could be right now. I'm still pissed at her, but… well, I shouldn't talk about your commanding officer. Suffice it to say I believe it's her now. And that I wouldn't trust your safety to just anybody. If it comes up, you should go ahead and let her know you and I are involved. I'm not on the ship anymore so nobody can get pissed about it. And I want her to know that she has someone so precious to me in her care. She'll take good care of you._

_I'm so sorry you had to see me hurt, baby. I know I look like hell, and it was probably only worse when you were in here while I was unconscious. The pain isn't too bad - they've got me on the good shit. The casts come off tomorrow, and then they'll let me get up and walk around a little. Right now I've got this hot little thing for a physical therapist who comes in and stretches me out, but I'm told in a week or so I'll start up with a group. You're not jealous or anything, right? ;) Hopefully I'll be shipshape in no time. I don't know if I'll be able to come back to the Normandy, but I'm gonna try hard as I can to make that happen._

_I miss you, baby. Shit, it's only been a day and I'm sitting around with nothing to do and no one to talk to. I feel completely useless here. I've been reading a lot, trying to send messages to Mom and the girls. I checked with Alliance HQ, and they said Sarah's husband was recalled. _

_I don't really know what to say. I wanna see you so bad. Just… hold you. Bury my face in your throat. I'm sure both of us could use the stress-relief of an orgasm or five. But I want more than that. And less. I just… I just want you. Right here, in my arms. I can just barely smell you, if I close my eyes and concentrate. Did I ever tell you that you smell like cream? Mixed with the coconut oil you use on your hair and skin, it's like you're the sexiest, snuggliest little dessert I ever had. And it's great, because I can actually have my cake and eat it, too._

_I don't know what I'm writing anymore. I'm just rambling. Ugh. I miss you. I guess that's really it. Come see me in the hospital when you come to the Citadel. And try to call me, like, for real. I wanna see your face._

_Love,_

_Ash"_

"Oh, Ashley," Samantha sighed, wiping the tear that had trailed down her cheek. "Oh, you wonderful, lovely woman." Ashley had this way of making Sam feel like the most important person in the world. She always felt so special with Ash. The lieutenant-commander saw her in a light that Sam had a hard time seeing on her own, and yet, when Ashley spoke about her, she really did believe the woman. It was a skill that worked very well at buttering Sam up, and got Ashley laid just about as often as Samantha could manage it.

Now, though, it made her heart ache for her fiancée.

"Hey, Sam."

The voice that jarred her out of her heartache belonged to her replacement, a pale-skinned man not quite a decade older than herself who had served as an engineer before doing the year of tech training for communications, getting his one sad promotion up to petty officer second class. She wasn't overly fond of him, even though he'd only been on the ship for a day, but she was leery of stepping on any toes this early in the game. She was senior to him in rank, but he was senior in age and military experience, especially on ships. It was a… tricky situation. Especially given that they were stuck on a (_small_) ship together.

The way he called her by her nickname, rather than her last name or her rank or job title, grated at her, however, pulling her right out of her euphoria over hearing from Ash.

"Hello, Petty Officer Rajad," she answered, pointedly using his rank and last name. He didn't seem to pick up on it, and Sam barely kept from rolling her eyes.

"Anything I need to know about?" he asked.

She shook her head, closing out of everything so he could sign in. "No, nothing going on right now. Let me know if anything comes up, alright?"

"I know what I'm doing, Sam. Got more years than you in the chain of command, pup."

She bristled, but held her tongue. That didn't stop her from internally abusing the man, though. _I know that, you arse. Yet you're still here, without ever being promoted. I know educated younger people coming in and getting promoted before you are is annoying, but maybe if you were competent and didn't treat me like I was a child, you might have made more of yourself than still being PO2 __**at **__**ten years in**__._

Sam left quickly, taking refuge in the cafeteria. Grabbing a dehydrated meal, she pulled up Ashley's message again, reading it once before doing anything to even prepare her food.

She read it ten more times, memorizing it by the time she was done eating. Despite her earlier tears, the message left her buoyant for the rest of the day.


	14. Chapter 14

**Ashley**

The halo was off. Ashley still wasn't allowed to walk much, though. Instead, the physical therapist was making do her some exercises and stretches which kept her neck limber while strengthening it. But it was on order for her to get up and walk up and down the hallway with a volunteer twice daily for the next few days. It wasn't much, but Ashley was surprised when it completely took it out of her the first time.

She had _not_ expected to be so incapacitated in the rest of her body by a neck injury.

Ashley did her exercises religiously, doing everything the doctor would allow her to. Leg lifts, crunches, toe-raises, lunges - anything that didn't make her stretch or strain her neck or shoulders. She spent a _lot_ of time doing these, building up a sweat when she could, even if it was light. She didn't want to lose her fitness, not with the Reaper invasion going on. They were in the middle of a war: she was _not_ going to have to sit it out just because she sat on her duff in the hospital.

She still hadn't gotten ahold of her mom or sisters. She was trying very hard not to panic, because there was always the chance her mom had gotten onto a transport, that her sisters had gotten off the planet somehow, and they just couldn't cut through the crazy communications traffic to get ahold of Ashley. There was also a good resistance going, moving from place to place and staying in small numbers, according to the ANN. _Mom's smart. She'll have attached herself to something like that if she didn't make it off-planet. She's young, healthy. I bet she's putting her nursing expertise to work._

She hadn't heard from Sam again. It was… well, it wasn't surprising, but it _was_ disappointing. There was no news of the _Normandy_. It was a stealth ship; no one was going to get news about the ship's whereabouts except the higher ups. So all Ashley had for now was the letter Sam had left for her, and it was quickly becoming too little.

She'd tried countless times to make a call. Somehow her omnitool had survived her encounter with the Cerberus mech, and so she had pictures and old recordings and conversations, and the specialist's contact information. But her calls would simply not go through. The only thing she'd managed to get through was the letter she'd written, and there was no way to tell if Sam had received it.

So she read, and exercised, and hoped and prayed. She wished she had her dad's rosary. That kind of meditative practice would be really nice right now, what with all this thinking and _not moving_ she was doing.

Two days after the halo came off - four days since Mars - she snuck out of her room, unable to take the silence any longer. Ashley had long learned that if you looked like you knew what you were doing, you didn't draw a lot of questions. So, dressed in sweatpants and a ribbed undershirt, she walked confidently out into the hall. Dr. Michele wasn't in sight, nor were any of her regular nurses.

"Score," Ashley breathed to herself, turning around the corner, making for the lobby. She just wanted to get some fresh air, see some people who weren't her nurses, be in a room that had more noises than her machines. Her bare feet craved the cool feeling of the metallic flooring. As she walked, she reached her fingers out, feeling the texture of the wall, the windows. She could feel the slight buzz of the decontamination chamber as she walked through it, again confidently, as though this were exactly where she was supposed to be.

When the door opened onto the reception room, her heart did a little flip. It was full of people. As the eldest in a big family, Ashley had a difficult time dealing with long periods of solitude. It tended to bring down her mood. But this, this room full of people moving and talking and _being_, energized her, filled her with a sense of purpose. Moving slowly into the middle of the room, Ashley looked for a seat. The room seemed to be multi-purpose; there were all manner of people, with all manner of business, around the giant room. Patients were visiting with family or friends along one wall, while across the room there seemed to be cubicles set aside, people in the uniforms of counselors sitting with patients with at least a scrap of privacy. Ash suspected it wasn't normally like this, but the Citadel had limited space, and the hospital was utilizing every inch it could.

The middle of the room was dominated by a reception desk, but it was actually quite small, with just three people staffing it. The rest of the rather large space was full of couches and individual chairs, people of all species scattered about. It wasn't horribly crowded, but it did take Ashley a moment to find a seat - off in a corner, luckily by a window. Moving over there, she perched on the chair, seating herself between a male drell and the wall.

There had been a time when she would have been incredibly uncomfortable next to the drell. But both Kaidan and Miriam had helped rid her of her entirely irrational dislike of non-humans. Liara helped, too. Really, everyone on the _SR-1_ worked together in a way to disprove all of Ashley's assumptions regarding aliens. She was so comfortable now that she only remarked mentally that she was next to a drell because she'd never actually seen one of his species before. She tried to remember what she knew - the drell lived with the Hanar? - but couldn't really drag up all the information she'd gotten from that one course she'd had to take as part of her Alliance training, right after basic. Shrugging inwardly, she looked out the window, intending to just spend some time with a different view.

Her thoughts turned to her father pretty quickly, however. He'd been the rock in her life until he died when she was seventeen. When they'd been informed of his death in the line of duty, her world had crumbled from beneath her feet. She'd spent most of her life helping to raise her sisters because of his frequent deployments, but having him dead was very different from having him just not home. She couldn't talk to him anymore, couldn't listen to his deep voice tell her that her heartbreak would pass, and he couldn't tell her anymore that he'd help her pack her damn bags himself when she threatened to be done with all of them. He _got_ her, knew how to deflate her when she was feeling uppity, knew when she really did need comforting, and yet never coddled her.

And then the Alliance soldier appeared on their doorstep, informed them his ship had been destroyed, and the world stopped. He was just _gone_, and he was never coming back. There'd been no warning that their last conversation would indeed be their _last_ conversation. Last hug, last pat on the head, last kiss on the cheek, last girly horde swarming him to the ground when he came home on leave. He was steadfast and strong, caring and warm, and he was gone and she didn't know what to do.

So she'd acted out. By sleeping around, partying, getting drunk. It hadn't helped, but it _had_ gotten her mother _pissed_. Her mother was waiting for her one night - really, it was early morning - and had actually _slapped_ her when she smelled the alcohol on a young Ashley's breath. Several months of curfew, therapy, and crying sessions with her sisters had straightened her out, though. She was lucky. Some parents didn't care enough to do that, or were so lost in their own grief that they couldn't muster the parental energy to handle their children. But not Ashley's mom. Ashley's mom was on top of her shit, and her kids' shit.

One of the things Ashley had clung to as she got back on the right path was religion. In a world of aliens and interstellar travel, of the military in space, of colonizing _planets_, Ashley Williams was a devout Catholic. As a kid she hadn't cared, but as Ashley came to terms with her father's death, she had started researching the faith he had held so dear. But he had also held it close, not forcing it on his uninterested wife and children.

She had found a world of therapeutic traditions and comforting spirituality. She'd started attending mass, eventually joined by every single member of her family. When she'd left for basic training, her mother had gifted her with her father's rosary, which she said he had been fond of using to meditate. Those beads were still on the _Normandy_ now, in her equipment locker. _I should tell Sam so it doesn't get lost_, she thought to herself suddenly. It was important. She didn't want to lose it because someone else took her locker and dumped her stuff somewhere.

Toying with the ring that was now back on her finger, Ashley said a silent prayer of thanks that she had kept it on her person. She'd never admit it out loud, but she liked to think that it had kept her safe, kept her from dying.

God, her thoughts were everywhere.

Taking a deep breath, Ashley decided to meditate. She may not have the rosary on which to count, but it wasn't like she needed it, not really. Taking another deep breath, she closed her eyes, beginning to recite the Apostle's Creed under her breath.

"I believe in God the Father Almighty, creator of heaven and earth..."

Ashley opened her eyes some time later. She had been steadily working her way through the rosary, counting her Hail Marys on her fingers and keeping track of how many decades she'd gone through. Now, though, she was through, and she felt… empty. But not depressingly so. She just felt content, the light shining through the window wonderful to behold, her thoughts no longer going in every direction.

"Excuse me." A gravelly voice sounded next to her. Turning, she saw that the drell man still sat beside her, his inky black eyes turned her way. Well, as far as she could tell, anyway. It wasn't like there were pupils or irises for her to get some clue of specifically what he was focusing on.

"Yes?" she answered. She knew he was addressing her, as there was no one else - she was sitting next to him and the wall.

"I couldn't help but notice you meditating, and it… I apologize, I know this is a strange question. I simply rarely meet others who are religious and was intrigued. Your meditation seemed religious. I couldn't understand your words, but the repetitive nature was familiar."

Ashley furrowed her brows. This was… odd. "It was religious. I was saying the rosary."

He blinked, a strange combination of multiple eyelids that Ashley had to control her reaction toward. It was… unsettling. "Forgive me, I am unfamiliar with human religious traditions. What is the rosary?"

Ashley wasn't sure she wanted to discuss Catholicism with an alien, but the question itself was innocent enough. "It's… they're prayer beads. You count on the beads of a rosary and say specific prayers, moving from one side of the beads around to the other side. It's… meditative." She didn't really feel like going into the history and cultural traditions of the veneration of the Virgin Mary at this point. Too much back information needed.

"Ah, I see. You are lacking your beads?"

Ashley blushed. "Yeah. They're… difficult to get ahold of, and I don't have mine here. So I was counting on my fingers."

He nodded, looking away, presumably out the window. "Prayer can be healing. The meditation clears the mind, allows us to relax our bodies; sets our spirits at ease."

Ashley blinked. "Are… are you religious, too?"

The man nodded, turning his head in her direction once more. "I worship the old gods of my people. Not many do anymore."

Ashley nodded. "Yeah, not many of us believe anymore. But I just… I don't know how you could look out on the stars, at the infinite space and possibility, and not believe in _something_."

The drell blinked. "I had not even thought of it that way. Most look out and wonder how a deity has any place among the stars."

Ashley shrugged. "I guess I don't."

He hummed.

After a pause, Ashley swallowed down her suddenly thundering heart and held out her hand. "I'm Ashley Williams."

He blinked, looking down at her hand for a moment. Slowly, carefully, he placed his hand in hers, palm to palm. His fingers were odd, the two middle ones seeming fused. His skin was surprisingly smooth and cool, yet she could feel warmth emanating from the flesh below. She was not expecting any of those things from someone so clearly reptilian.

"I am Thane Krios."

Ashley smiled, looking fully into his face for a moment. She could see now that his eyes were dark, but still possessed the iris and pupil. His face was both familiar and alien, and Ashley truly could have stared all day, but pulled her eyes away after only a few seconds so as not to be rude.

A silence settled as she released his hand. She didn't know how to keep the conversation going, but was saved from having to figure it out when a hand tapped her shoulder. Startled, she turned, only to don a sheepish expression.

"Uh, hi, Dr. Michele," she said, pushing her hair behind her ear.

The doctor merely pursed her lips. "I see you are already tired of your room, Commander. Come, you have a call."

Ashley perked up at that. Getting to her feet, trying to ignore how sore her neck was from the prolonged sitting in one position, she looked down at Thane.

"It was nice to meet you, Thane. Maybe I'll see you around."

"Indeed. It was nice to meet you as well, Ashley," he said, his inky eyes already no longer off-putting. "I shall make sure to greet you if I see you again."

"So, who's this call from?" Ashley asked Dr. Michele, hoping that it was finally her fiancée.

The doctor didn't answer, merely glancing over her shoulder, her eyes hiding a smile that made Ashley's heart flutter. Dr. Michele knew about Sam - everyone did. Now that she wasn't in a military facility, Ashley couldn't seem to shut the fuck up about her. She supposed there were worse ways to act about being engaged. Nearly skipping at mention of her fiancée was not a terrible way to act.

Ashley nearly flew back into her hospital room, seeing Sam's face on the terminal over in the corner. Rushing over with a giant grin on her face, she very nearly grabbed the holographic display into a hug.

"Sam!"

Sam grinned. "Ashley!"

"Goddamn, you're beautiful," she said, her grin nearly splitting her face. Sam was… it was unclear _where_ on the ship she was. Her hair was down, hanging in such a way as to suggest Sam was lying on her stomach. Her dark skin was lit by the light from her omnitool, making her look almost like she was going to be telling a ghost story. Her face was more than welcome, smiling in that special way Ashley only ever saw when they were alone, her form moving a little in a way that proved that she was indeed there, and not an old picture Ashley was staring at.

"Such a flatterer, Ashley," Sam said, her smile turning coy. "Keep it up, and you'll need to ensure you can have a few minutes alone."

Ashley smirked. "Been long enough that I think a few minutes would be all I'd need," she joked. It was true though. When it had been a little while, it suddenly took her almost no time to get off.

"It's been four days, Ashley. Hardly a lifetime. And anyway I unfortunately don't actually have enough privacy to do that." Sam paused, her expression softening. "God, Ashley, it is so good to see you awake and alert. I can't even describe how warm my heart is right now."

Ashley's heart dropped a little. "I'm sorry, baby. I can't begin to imagine…"

Sam sniffed, wiping her eye. "Let's… let's talk about what's been going on, shall we? I don't want to spend any more time crying over this."

Ashley smiled warmly. "Okay, baby, what do you want to talk about?"

"I could tell you about what we're up to on the ship?"

Ashley shook her head. "Better not. I can guarantee you this channel through the Citadel is not secure. Tell me about how you finally got through."

Sam nodded, smiling. "It was simple, really. I made a call to the hospital through Alliance channels, and they transferred it to your room. I've been trying your omnitool all this time. The hospital is much more prominent and anchored in the network than one single omnitool."

Ash blinked. "That was it? So if I call you from this terminal I'll be okay?"

Sam nodded. "As far as I can tell."

"Well shit…"

Sam giggled. "Let's see, what else… James and Joker are treating me well. I'm settling in. We played cards last night."

Ashley snorted. "Did you beat the pants off both of them? They're both terrible."

Sam shook her head. "You know I'm better at strategy games. They beat the pants off _me_. And from James's flirting, I'm sure he would've loved it if they did actually come off."

"He touches you, I'll skin him alive," Ashley growled, watching Sam's eyes darken a little with desire. "You're mine, sweetcheeks. No one gets to steal you away while we're apart."

Sam just smirked. "I don't see a ring on this finger, Ash."

"Soon as I'm out of here, I'll take care of it. You guys coming back anytime soon?"

Sam shook her head. "I honestly don't know. But you will be the _first_ place I go."

Ashley smiled. "I know. I love you. Tell me about what you do on your off time."

Sam pursed her lips in thought. "Well…"

* * *

><p><em>AN: Just a couple quick notes. There weren't a lot of details about Ashley's family on the wiki, so I made some shit up. Wheee!_

_Two, I got rid of Thane's moniker, because it was a cumbersome detail that didn't really matter. So. There._


	15. Chapter 15

_A/N: Some changes to canon here. That's okay, right? _

* * *

><p><strong>Samantha<strong>

Samantha was not on-duty for Palaven. They arrived to the system around midnight ship-time, Samantha cozily asleep in her bunk. Something woke her after only a few hours of sleep, however. Sitting up, she took in all the waking forms around her. Furrowing her brows, she swung her feet over the edge of her bunk, making sure not to hit the person below her.

Suddenly, the ship bucked. "What the-" she started, only to cut herself off in a bit of a yelp, catching hold of the wall to keep from being thrown off her bed. The night light strips on the floor flickered ominously.

"Uh… it's not good when the power goes out and you're in space, right?" someone piped up.

Samantha snorted a laugh, albeit quietly. "No, no it's really not," she murmured to herself. Then, louder, she called toward the ceiling. "EDI? What's going on?"

No answer.

_That's strange…_

Pushing herself off the bed to the floor, forgoing the ladder and simply landing nimbly at the foot of her colleague's bed, Sam reached for her omnitool, affixing it to her wrist before pulling up the display. "Damn, there are no comms anywhere in the ship," she said.

"Alright, everyone head to your posts," Adams said, pulling on a fresh uniform shirt. "If you can't get there for some reason, then stay in the mess hall. Let people know comms are down as you pass them. Any questions?"

Someone groaned, "Is there _no_ chance we get to sleep more?"

He just chuckled. "Nope. Sorry folks. Welcome to life aboard a ship."

A few minutes later, Sam had her uniform on - a clean one, as the one she'd worn not four hours before had been put into the sanitizer already - and was just tying her boots before heading out the door. The power wasn't actually out, but the lights in the whole ship hadn't stopped flickering. _Disconcerting, to say the least_.

"Hey, Traynor?"

Samantha looked up to see she was now alone with Adams. "Yes, Lieutenant?"

"I need you to check on EDI. Go to the AI core and see why she isn't talking to us or responding in any way." He pulled up his omnitool, her own chirping a second later. "I've got direct link set up for messages. Can't do voice, but you can type and send the text message to me. Best we can do in these conditions."

Samantha nodded, finishing with her boots before standing up. "No problem, sir. I'll head there straightaway."

He smiled. "Thanks, Traynor."

He was out the door almost immediately, Sam on his heels. But whereas he went directly for the lift, Sam continued past him, heading for the medical bay. Chakwas, who was on duty because she must be whenever there were marines on the ground, looked up when she entered.

"Can I help you, Samantha?"

Sam smiled. She was still _so_ grateful to the woman for intervening when she couldn't see Ashley in the hospital. "No, Doctor. EDI isn't responding, and we have no communications, so Adams sent me to see what I can find out in the AI core."

The woman nodded. "Makes sense. The ground team will be on the ship in the next few minutes. Last transmission was Cortez letting me know he had them and there were no injuries."

"Good to know. Let me know if someone's able to get ahold of you, will you?"

Chakwas nodded, turning back to her terminal. "Will do, Samantha."

Sam passed through the doors, unsurprised when they shut behind her. Going straight to the terminal, Sam began working.

"EDI?" she called, just testing once more. To her surprise, EDI's voice issued from behind her.

"Specialist Traynor, I am-"

Samantha never learned what EDI was. She gasped, just seeing something alarming on the holographic display of the terminal before she was hit hard across the shoulders. She crumpled to the floor. Instinct took over and she rolled away, staring wide-eyed as a robotic foot crashed down where her head had been. Looking up, she saw it was the mech that had injured Ashley so horrifically. But as she stared, the color of the visor flickered, changing from blue to orange.

EDI's voice issued from its mouth. "Specialist Traynor, please exit this room; I am attempting to take control of the Cerberus mobile platf-"

She was cut off again, the visor flickering back to blue. Somehow, the eyes held all the malice in the world. Sam could say with confidence that she had _never_ been looked at like that before. The floor bucked beneath her, tossing her onto her belly. As she tried to scramble to her feet - and away from the angry machine - the door's holographic interface turned red.

Her stomach dropped.

_Shit. I'm locked in here._

_Don't panic Sammy._

_Too. Bloody. Late._

Something told her to move, so, abandoning her attempt to get her feet under her, Samantha dropped and rolled to her left, ramming her elbow right into a bank of equipment. Swearing at the numbness radiating up from her funny bone, she tried to keep moving, but a metallic hand went crashing into the computers right where she'd intended to move, causing a spray of sparks in front of her face.

Sam had never experienced electrocution. But as the power surged in the computer bank before the emergency systems kicked in, she knew for a fact that electrocution was what was happening to her now. Technically electrocution was _death _by electric shock, but Sam wasn't going to split hairs at the moment. She couldn't move anything, or perhaps more accurately, everything was trying to move at once. Her back straightened painfully and she hit the ground face-first, her whole body shaking, yet rigid.

Suddenly it was over, her body going limp. Her heart raced. All her skin was tingling, her fingers and hands and arms twitching at random every few seconds. Hands seized her shoulders, turning her onto her back. Her eyes opened and she saw the Cerberus mech standing over her, its visor blessedly orange.

_EDI. It's EDI. Maybe it's over. Oh who bloody cares? If it kills me, it kills me. I can't move anyway._

"Specialist Traynor, I apologize. Are you hurt?"

"I…"

The doors suddenly slid open, Shepard's voice filling the cabin. "Talk to me EDI, what's happening?"

The commander stood silhouetted against the medbay lights. She still wore her armor, had a rifle in her hand, though her helmet was off. In her addled state, Sam thought it was her fiancée.

"Ashley?" she murmured, before it was all just too much and black overwhelmed her, rocking her away to oblivion.

* * *

><p>A metallic hand, skin melting off of it, reached for her face.<p>

"No!" Sam cried, sitting up to see she was actually in the medbay and the hand had been a dream.

"Whoa, calm down there, tiger!"

The voice was Shepard's. Blinking in the bright lights, Sam saw that Shepard, now in her uniform and not in her combat armor, was getting up from a seat near Chakwas's workstation. Right about then the pain hit, however. Wincing, Sam lay back down, the whole scene with the Cerberus machine coming back to her.

"Bloody hell," she murmured.

"You can say that again," Shepard said, appearing at her side. "What the fuck were you doing in there when EDI went nuts? Without telling anyone? Comms down?"

Sam opened her eyes, looking up at Shepard. The woman looked worried, pissed, and sympathetic all at once. "Adams ordered me in there when the ship started bucking." Her voice was scratchy, but it didn't hurt too badly. "EDI wasn't responding, comms were down. We couldn't communicate with anyone not in shouting distance."

Shepard knit her brows. "I'm gonna have to talk to Adams about sending people dangerous places on their own."

Sam shook her head. "Nobody thought it was dangerous, Commander. I went in there to sort through EDI's code and see what the issue was. We don't… we don't think like marines, ma'am. It was just a computer terminal."

Shepard narrowed her eyes, then hung her head, shaking it. "You're right. I go in there alone all the time, even when it was where Legion spent his time."

Sam was confused. "Legion?"

Shepard shook her head again. "Don't worry about it, I'm just talking out of my ass. Do you remember everything that happened?"

Sam shook her head, trying to sit up only for her stomach muscles to protest mightily. "Oh, that hurts something awful," she murmured, suddenly feeling like she had that time an eight year old Richard had kicked her in the gut.

Shepard's arm went around her shoulders immediately, helping her to sit up. It disappeared as soon as she was upright, for which Sam was grateful. The woman's presence was alarmingly similar to Ashley's, her scent earthy, her body powerful, and it all worked to make Samantha incredibly uncomfortable. It also made her heart pang for Ashley.

"Did everything work out alright with EDI?" she asked.

Shepard opened her mouth, but EDI's holographic sphere popped up in the corner, her voice filling the room. "The Cerberus AI has been thoroughly deactivated, Specialist Traynor. The program has been fragmented so that it no longer has sapience or a will of its own. It will be destroyed completely soon."

Sam nodded. "That's good. But the data you needed was still there?"

"The data was in the hard drives in the mobile platform. I was able to isolate it as I disassembled Eva Core's program."

Sam smiled. "Excellent. And now you have a sex-bot body to use. That will be interesting."

Shepard smirked. "She can even join the ground team, apparently."

Sam's eyes got wide. "Ooooo that should be useful! She can hack with much more speed than any organic being, and can do it while also shooting. And if she does get shot, we don't lose her."

Shepard stared, mouth slightly open.

Sam blushed. "What?"

"I just… hadn't thought of it like that." She paused, then suddenly jumped. "Oh, I just remembered. Are you in pain? Chakwas gave me something to give you before she went to catch some sleep."

Sam furrowed her brows. "My entire body hurts. My back and shoulders especially. And my face. Why does my face hurt?"

Shepard smirked. "You had a pretty nasty electric shock and slammed your face into the ground, Traynor, not to mention the hit or two you took. You look like you tried to headbutt a krogan."

Sam narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "You speak like you know what that's like, Commander."

Shepard grinned. "I do indeed know what that's like."

"I hope you at least had your helmet," Sam said with a wince.

Shepard shook her head. "Nope. Just my noggin. Where do you think this dashing scar came from?" she said, pointing to the fine white line that traveled from the center of her forehead through her left eyebrow. It wasn't wide or thick, but it was visible, the brow hairs not growing where it sliced through.

Sam had to admit it actually was quite dashing.

"From headbutting a krogan," Sam repeated incredulously, an eyebrow up.

Shepard snickered. "I know, I'm an idiot. Here, you want this or not?" She held up a vial of what was probably morphine.

Sam considered it for a moment. "Oh hell, why not?"

Shepard grinned, pushing the medicine into Sam's IV. "That's the spirit. Why pass up drugs when they're prescribed and sanctioned by your doctor?"

The effect was instantaneous. Sam felt it flood her system, and she sighed contentedly. "There is a reason this is still not available without a prescription," she said, settling into her body again. She could still sense the pain, but the morphine just made her not give a shit. It was _lovely_.

A chirping sound came from Chakwas's desk. Looking over, her vision following the movement of her head a second or two later, Sam smiled. "Is that mine? I have a call!"

Shepard laughed, going over to the desk and retrieving the skin-molding bracelet-computer for her. Sam grinned, answering immediately.

"Ashley!" she greeted excitedly, seeing her fiancée's beautiful face hovering before her.

"Hey, Sam." Ashley smiled, making Sam's heart soar.

"Goodness, I've missed you."

"Ash?" Shepard asked, perplexed, brows furrowed. "What… what are you doing calling my lead communications specialist at four in the morning? Or, you know, at all?"

"Oh!" Sam exclaimed, remembering Ashley had told her to let the cat out of the bag. "I forgot to tell you, Shepard! Ashley and I are engaged," she sing-songed, swaying happily back and forth in her seat.

Shepard gaped. "You're… engaged. To be married?"

Sam just giggled.

Ashley, on the other hand, frowned, her eyes traveling between Shepard and Sam. "Yeah, Miriam, to be married. What the hell is wrong with my fiancée?"

Sam did a little dance. "Chakwas has me on the Good Shit, Ash! I don't feel a thing!"

Ashley's voice took on a very measured tone, her frown deepening. "What?"

Sam continued to bounce around. A voice in the back of her mind told her she should be concerned, that she perhaps had said something she shouldn't have, but she ignored it. The world. It was bouncy.

Shepard cleared her throat. "I'll, uh… I'll just be goin-"

"Like _hell_ you will," Ashley nearly shouted. She was so sexy when she was angry. Also adorable. "Shepard, why is my fiancée high on painkillers? Why is her face all bruised?"

Shepard rubbed a hand over the back of her neck. "She, uh… well, you know that mech that injured you?"

Ashley's expression immediately clouded. "Yeah, the one that broke my _fucking_ neck?"

"Yeah, that's the one. It, uh… _might_ have trapped Traynor in the AI core with it while EDI tried to take control of the platform…"

Sam stilled, looking at Ash. She wore a tank top and no bra, and Sam suddenly very much wanted to see it off of her. "Ashley, it's been ages since we've had sex. What do you say to a little pick me up?"

Ashley shifted her gaze to Sam and sighed wearily. "Sam… Go to sleep, baby. You're high as a giraffe's vagina." Her eyes shifting, her expression not changing despite Sam giggling at her joke, she continued. "Miriam, transfer this call to your omni. We need to _talk_."

Her tone was deadly serious, and it only made Sam randier. But then Shepard was easing her down, and she was suddenly sleepy. She saw Shepard's remarkable ass disappear through the doors. She didn't get to say goodnight to Ashley. She missed her terribly. And _her _remarkable ass.


	16. Chapter 16

_A/N: Special thanks to my beta for military info and for poetry info, neither of which I'm well-versed in. :)_

* * *

><p><strong>Ashley<strong>

Ashley was silent as Shepard walked with her on her omnitool through the mess. As soon as the commander was on the lift, however, Ashley started in on her.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Miriam?! You let a non-com in there with that _thing_? Why is it even still on the ship? Why are you letting that AI of yours mess with it?"

"Ashley, calm down-"

"I am _not_ going to calm down, Miriam! That is my _fiancée_! How would you feel if I let that happen to Liara?!"

"Williams, stand _down_," Shepard finally cut in, her tone stern, a frown slicing into her features. "You are_ out of line_."

"Bullshit, Shepard. I don't take orders from you right now," Ashley countered, her expression mirroring her friend's. "You're endangering your crew for no good reason. Do the ends justify the means for you, Miriam? You're just like-"

"I _dare_ you to finish that, Williams." Shepard's voice was hard, deadly. Ashley had been about to say "Cerberus," and Shepard knew it. "Williams, that mech is staying on this ship. It has data we _need_ in order to win this war. This war is bigger than you, than me, than Specialist Traynor, or Liara, and you _know_ it."

Ashley snapped her mouth shut, only her deeply-ingrained military training keeping her from retorting. Shepard was right. It pissed her off.

Shepard sighed, her expression softening. "Look, I… firstly, I had _no idea_ you guys were involved. Second, I'm not the one who ordered her in there with the mech. I wasn't even on the ship – I was saving Garrus's ass from a turian outpost on one of their moons. She got banged around a little, but she's okay. Shit like that happens sometimes, even to non-combatants. She's serving on an active-duty warship, Ash." She shrugged, letting her thought go unfinished. Finishing it wasn't really necessary. Ashley knew what she meant.

The lieutenant-commander sighed, rubbing her hand through her hair. It was filthy. She seriously needed a shower. "I know, Miriam, I just… I can't _do_ anything from here! I call my girlfriend, our second time talking since I was out cold, and I find her high on narcotics with her face all bruised? I mean, shit, Shepard. Part of the point of being a marine is so the people we love don't have to get hurt."

"And then we hurt them by getting hurt. We can't win, Ash."

Ashley deflated the rest of the way at that. "Fuck. I hate it when you're right."

Miriam smirked. "You must be used to disappointment then."

Ashley snorted a laugh. "Ha ha, very funny, Skipper." Sighing, Ashley looked around her room, her eyes falling on the book Miriam had left for her. "Hey, thanks for the poetry. You remembered Tennyson's my favorite."

Shepard shrugged. "You're my friend. I don't tend to forget shit like that, Ashley."

"Well, thanks. I appreciate it. I'm going a little stir-crazy here,"Ashley said, intentionally side-stepping the potential opening to a conversation about their friendship.

Shepard allowed it. "You're up and moving around, though. That's good."

Ashley nodded. "Yeah. I'm progressing. They won't release me to active duty yet - the bones are too freshly-healed and they're worried about some tendon or ligament or some shit I don't really remember. But I'm gonna see if maybe I can be released to sleep in an Alliance barracks, open up my room for someone else. God, Miriam… this hospital is already so full."

Miriam shook her head. "I know, Ash. And it's only gonna get worse from here. Supply shortages, hospital politics, greater station politics… So, let's talk about something good, instead. How on Earth do you know Specialist Traynor?"

"I… met her on assignment," Ashley offered. She didn't want to bring up Horizon. It was where their big fight was, and things were _just_ starting to get back on track. Ashley wasn't yet willing to forgive, but she was willing to try to rebuild their friendship. No need to drag them through the muck right at the moment.

Shepard smirked. "I see that goofy grin on your face, Ash. There's more to it than that."

Ashley's grin deepened. "She, uh… well, she wasn't supposed to be serious. Just some fun, you know?"

Shepard grinned, a mirror of Ashley's. "I do. And then it turned serious, I'm guessing?"

Ashley blushed. "Yeah. Seriously, Skipper, I pulled a _you_ and caught some motherfucking feelings." They both laughed before Ashley continued. "Luckily for me, she felt the same."

"So when did you propose? I didn't notice a ring?"

"She's, uh, actually the one who proposed," Ashley said, lifting her hand and briefly flashing her ring. "Um… the night before the Reapers hit…"

Shepard whistled low. "Fuck, Ash… that's some seriously bad luck."

Ashley shrugged. "Nothing to do about it now. I just… I worry about her. Just sitting around is already taking its toll on me. I can't do anything to keep her safe. I haven't heard from my mom or the girls. The sitting and not _doing _is driving me nuts. We're in a war! I'm a marine, dammit!"

Miriam shook her head. "I know, Ash. It's maddening. There's a reason I was in the gym so much after I turned myself in. I'd been moving, doing shit, since I found _you_ on Eden Prime. Shit, since before that. Ever since they found me on Mindoir, really. Then suddenly I was sitting with my thumb up my ass, doing _nothing_. Nothing about the Reapers, nothing about the destroyed relay, nothing about protecting all the people who thought I was nuts or lying. Just sitting. I didn't even have the extranet to keep up on news or contact anyone outside the Alliance. Just pre-loaded datapads with books, and the gym, and debrief after interview after court proceedings. Fuckin' military lawyers, man. They only wanna cover the Alliance's ass. Throw the rest of us by the wayside. Thank God for Anderson and Hackett."

Ashley felt a pang of guilt. "You mean you hadn't gotten ahold of Liara, either?" Here she'd been, falling in love, spending her time mooning over Sam to her mother, introducing the other woman to her family, and Shep had been right down the hall, unable to talk to _anyone_. Ashley could've _called_ someone for her, at the very least. She'd had no idea Liara was on Mars. _Fuck. All my friends were available, and all I've been able to think about was Sam…_

Shepard sighed. "Ash, there's… a lot has happened. Me and Liara, we're… complicated."

Ashley frowned. "Do you love her?"

Shepard's look said everything. She looked at Ashley like the LC was crazy. "Of course I love her. You know that."

Ashley brushed off the look. "Then what's so fucking complicated? I saw you two on Mars."

Shepard sighed. Her surroundings pitched on Ashley's vid screen, and then she was lying on her bed. "I love someone else, too. Because apparently I can't ever have sex with _anyone_ without catching the damn feels."

Ashley gaped. "Jesus Miriam! How the hell… when did you have time to get involved with someone else?"

Shepard got a shifty look. "She was on the ship with me…"

Ashley narrowed her eyes. "I know that look, Miriam."

Miriam sighed. "She was my yeoman…" Ashley's jaw actually dropped. "I didn't plan it!" the commander said defensively. "She came on to me! Besides, at that point, Liara and I were no-go. But we reconciled not long before the Collector base. She… she knew about Kelly, and we agreed we'd figure shit out once I got done with the Collectors. But then Kelly was abducted along with the entire non-com crew, and I saved her on the Collector base, and that has a funny way of making you realize how much you love someone. And then I didn't get any time to figure it out because I blew up a fucking relay and all the Cerberus personnel went on the run from the Illusive Man when I turned myself in to the Alliance. And I didn't hear from _anyone_ while I was incarcerated. Now I know Liara's safe, but Kelly's in hiding and I don't know where she is, and I love them both, and goddamn I am just a fucking idiot."

Ashley blinked a few times before responding with a smirk. "Feel better getting that hot mess out in the open, Miriam?"

Shepard glared a moment before shaking her head, a small smile pulling at her lips. "Yes."

"So Liara knows about this other girl. Is she not open to sharing you? Are you with them both? How does that work?"

"I'll let you know when I figure it out," Shepard sighed. "We haven't talked about it, to tell you the truth."

Ashley just gave her a look.

Shepard's face flushed. "I know, I know. She's busy, I'm busy. We picked up Garrus. Palaven's a mess. Now Hackett wants me to check something out on Eden Prime, of all places."

"Weird." Ashley hadn't been there since she lost her entire unit. Those were not memories she enjoyed recalling. "Glad I'm not there for that one, to be perfectly honest, Skipper."

Shepard nodded. "Yeah, I don't blame you. Was one hell of a thing, finding you there." She got a strange look. "Is it weird I'm grateful, in a way?"

"What do you mean?" Ashley asked, brows furrowed.

Shepard shrugged, making eye contact. "Well, I have all those people to thank for you, Ash. I know things are… not perfect. But you're still one of the best friends I've ever had."

Ashley was stunned. They… they didn't talk like this. Ever. They drank, checked out women, and shot at things together. They competed on how fast they could field-strip a weapon, or from how far away they could hit something. They did _not_ talk so candidly about their feelings. Not about each other, anyway. About other women? Sure. Ashley had helped Miriam sort through her feelings for Liara on the original _Normandy_. But this was… this was just weird.

Suddenly, Ash realized she'd left too much silence. "Their sacrifice gave me a lot of opportunity, it's true. Though I wish it hadn't happened like that," she said in a rush, trying to cover the awkwardness she'd created.

"Yeah," Shepard said with a nod. After a moment of silence, she sat up, sighing. "Listen, Ash. I gotta go. I haven't slept in more than a day, and we gotta go do this thing on Eden Prime in a few hours."

Ashley nodded. "Yeah okay. Just… Miriam, that girl. She means more than I can really put into words. She might be all the family I have left."

Shepard smiled softly. "I'll do what I can to keep her safe, Ash. Thanks for letting me know about her. Everyone's important, but I like to know when I've got something precious aboard."

"No problem Skipper. Later."

"Later."

The call ended, Shepard's face disappearing from the HI display in front of her. Sighing, Ash trudged over to her bed, grabbing the book of poetry. She hadn't been able to sleep - the whole reason she'd called Sam in the first place - but now she was exhausted. She'd been through a large range of emotions in the last twenty minutes. Settling in, she began on a poem at random – _Marriage Morning_ – eventually falling asleep with the book open on her chest, the last stanzas playing through her mind.

_Heart, are you great enough_

_For a love that never tires?_

_O heart, are you great enough for love?_

_I have heard of thorns and briers. _

_Over the thorns and briers,_

_Over the meadows and stiles,_

_Over the world to the end of it,_

_Flash of a million miles._


	17. Chapter 17

_A/N: I've decided I should try to write longer chapters or this thing is just never going to be done. In Forbidden Magic I was posting anywhere between 4000 and 9000 words, so clearly I've got it in me. This writing from only two people's POV is starting to get to me though. I'm having to get creative to tell the **whole** story with only these two people. I am up to it, though! I swear!_

_Keep an eye out, there will be a one-shot coming up sometime from Liara's POV. It was incredibly helpful to do that with Moving On for Shepard, to give her a voice and to give me a handle on who she was (or who she could be). I'm going to try to do the same with Liara, because I'm only now, 17 chapters in, really starting to have any idea of what she's like._

_All that said, don't expect any more updates for like a week or so, even on the Smutty Adventures fic. I'm out of town this weekend for a friend's birthday, and while she would happily help me write erotica, I'm there for her birthday, so I don't want to spend the entire weekend five-feet-deep in my computer._

_Also, guys! Last week was my tenth anniversary as a couple with my wife! I had no idea ten years ago that this woman who claimed to be straight (turns out she's actually pretty queer) would still be with me and still be loving me all these years later. Just like Ash and Sam, it was just supposed to be a temporary thing! First relationship in college! Testing my feet in the waters of Adult Relationships! And now here we are, planning to have babies. Weird._

_Okay, that's enough rambling. Have a lovely weekend, and I hope you like this chapter!_

* * *

><p><strong>Samantha<strong>

Once again Samantha found herself standing nervously outside Shepard's cabin. Twice in the span of, what, three days? Had it only been a week since they left the Citadel? Since the Reapers attacked? Already she felt drained.

_Come on, Sammy. That could easily be because you were attacked by a hostile AI program fighting for reign over its body last night. You know, a normal night-time foray into the normal duties of a communications specialist._

Samantha sighed. If this was normal, then at least she'd have some good stories to share with her brothers. Thinking of her brothers steeled her resolve, and it was with a determined set to her lips and brows that she rang the chime on Shepard's door.

The door opened for her after a moment. Stepping through, Samantha stopped at the top of the steps, moving into a crisp salute. Shepard, sitting on her couch in fatigues and a loose t-shirt, smirked, returning the salute haphazardly from her seat. "At-ease, Traynor. Glad to see you're feeling up to being on duty. Having any residual pain?"

Samantha relaxed. "Yes, though it's nothing I can't handle. Chakwas gave me a… _mild_ painkiller this time."

Shepard mock-pouted, setting down a cup of coffee on the low table in front of her. "So no morphine-induced hilarity this morning? I'm disappointed."

Samantha's face immediately heated. "I… wanted to apologize for my behavior last night, Commander."

The commander grinned. "So you remember it, then?"

Sam shuddered. "Yes. Every excruciating moment."

"Awww, it wasn't _that_ bad, Specialist," Shepard said with a snicker.

Samantha shook her head, a small smile pulling at her lips. "Somehow I don't believe you, Commander. If I recall correctly, I told you in the most obnoxious way possible about my engagement to a good friend of yours, and then propositioned her in front of you."

Shepard nodded, her grin widening. "Yep, that's about how it happened."

Samantha closed her eyes, sighing heavily. "Christ Almighty, I make atrocious first impressions…"

"Nonsense. You made an awesome first impression - we geeked out for like an hour or something. It was great."

Sam just gave her a sardonic look. "Are you saying you'll magically forget last night?"

Shepard hesitated. "Good point." She then smiled and winked. "But it's fine. You were on morphine. People say stupid shit when they're high. So long as it doesn't happen when you're not high - and so long as you're not high while on-duty - I can deal with a little weird behavior when you're prescribed narcotics by our doctor."

"I think I can manage that, Commander."

Shepard nodded. "Good. Though, I gotta say, I was surprised to find out about you and Ash being a thing."

Samantha smiled. "Yes, I… she asked me to let you know, but I completely forgot. We haven't had a chance to talk, really, since I officially introduced myself to you, ma'am. Not a lot of opportunities to just say something about my engagement."

Shepard nodded. "True. It'd be a hell of a nonsequitor."

"Precisely." She hesitated before continuing. "Now that you know… will it be a problem?"

The commander's brows furrowed. "How would it be a problem? She's not even on the ship."

"Well, there are rules on the books…"

Shepard scoffed. "I don't give a shit about that, Traynor. You're capable and an adult. As long as you remain professional, I'm fine. I finally figured out why some nameless person was yelling over the comms on Mars, though…"

Samantha's face flushed, and she buried her head in her hands. "God, yes, that was me…"

Shepard's tone was gentle. "I can't imagine what that had to have been like, to watch that happen to your fiancée. It wasn't okay… but I looked in your record and saw that James already reprimanded you, so as far as I'm concerned, it's over and done with. You've been the picture of professionalism since, Specialist - minus last night, I suppose. And… to be perfectly honest, I think we all deserve to be let off easy for shit that happened the day the Reapers showed up. So… no harm done."

"I… thank you, Commander."

"No problem. Now, was there something else you needed?"

Sam's heart fell somewhere near her belly button. She'd managed to completely forget in her embarrassment. _Stupid, Sam. Complete blithering idiot_. "Actually, yes, Commander. I… I was doing some searching for various things this morning as my shift started, and…"

"You found something important?"

Sam nodded. "Yes, ma'am, I believe so. Do you know Grissom Academy?"

"I know it," Shepard said with a nod. "Sent a rather unfortunate victim of a bad Cerberus experiment there about eight months ago. Knew he'd be safe with them. What's up? Are they under attack?"

"I… I'm not sure, Commander. They've gone quiet, and it worries me."

Shepard's brows knit. "Lots of places have gone dark, Specialist."

"I- I know, Commander," Samantha stammered, knowing what Shepard was insinuating. Grissom, like those other places, was probably gone, which was unfortunate, but not worth investigating. "But this… this was different. The comm bouy in the system is intact, and the relay shows no sign of Reaper activity."

"Yeah, okay, that _is_ odd…"

"I did some research, did a little digging, and I finally found a backlog from the day before yesterday," Samantha rushed, pulling up the distress signal she'd found that morning. It had nearly caused her to lose the contents of her stomach. "As you can see, it was answered by a turian signal last night, but… it's a fake, ma'am. EDI recognized the signal from a mission while a part of Cerberus last year?"

Shepard, now looking thoroughly pissed, nodded. "Yeah. It's not worth explaining. It's Cerberus. Fucking hell…"

{_Commander, we're ten minutes out from Eden Prime,_} Joker's voice announced over the speakers in the room. {_Hopefully this time there isn't a rogue Spectre and a giant talking ship waiting for us. Given our luck in that arena, though, my money's on a giant space-faring beaver or something._}

"Dammit." Shepard laid narrowed eyes on her. "We're _here_ dealing with Cerberus, too. Listen, add the location to the galaxy map with all the info you have. We'll head there as soon as we're done on the ground here, check out what the hell Cerberus wants with a bunch of biotic and techie kids. Good catch, Traynor."

Sam blushed. "Th- thank you, Commander."

"Just one thing."

Sam, just turning to leave so Shepard could get ready for the ground mission, turned back toward her commander. "Yes, ma'am?"

"Why so concerned about Grissom? It seems like something no one would've caught if they weren't specifically looking for it."

Sam's flush deepened. "I… admit, it was personal, ma'am. My brother is a first-year student in the new tech program with the Alliance. They receive their training and education at Grissom."

Shepard's expression of curiosity took on a definite frown. Nodding, she turned, heading for her equipment locker. "I'll do what I can, Specialist. Dismissed."

Blushing even further - she had forgotten to wait to be dismissed when Shepard had stopped her - Sam rushed out, somehow unable to shake the feeling she'd been chastised, and yet not able to really tell _how_.

She didn't make it very far, however, as on the other side of the door she ran face-first into a wall. Bouncing off of it with a yelp, she started to fall. The only thing that kept her on her feet were two three-fingered hands grabbing her arm.

"Whoa, gotcha!"

It wasn't a wall at all. It was a turian. In full battle armor, sans helmet. Staring up at him, Samantha was unable to process anything but just how _tall_ he was. He had at least a foot on Ashley, if Sam was any judge, which meant he stood at least a foot and a half taller than herself. Blinking, her mouth open, she didn't realize she was being rude until the turian chuckled, his hand scratching the back of his neck almost nervously.

"I guess I was right, Shepard - the scars really _do_ make the ladies speechless." The voice was male, dual-tone as turians' were. This was literally the closest she had ever been to any member of an alien species.

Luckily, she remembered herself. _Finally. Jesus, Sammy._ "Oh, goodness, I'm so rude," she rushed, taking a step back and holding out her hand. "I- I'm Specialist Traynor. Thank you for keeping me from falling on the floor."

He smiled - at least, that's what Sam thought it meant when his mandibles moved in that way - and took her hand, utterly engulfing it with his own. He was gentle, however. For some reason that surprised the communications specialist.

"No problem. Garrus," he said. _I suppose that's his name?_ "You humans always think everyone else knows your greetings," he teased with a wink.

Samantha flushed. "I-I- I'm so sorry," she stammered, pulling her hand back and taking another step back, bumping into Shepard. She looked up, the commander smiling down at her. _God, her whole demeanor reminds me entirely of Ashley…_

"Runnin' into everything today, aren't you, Traynor?"

Sam swallowed. "I… can I just go, ma'am?" she squeaked. "Stop making a complete arse of myself and get back to my station?"

Shepard grinned. "I dunno. Maybe I'll make you follow me around the ship, see what else you get up to. You've already got a foot in your mouth. Think you got room for a hand or an elbow, too?"

Samantha buried her face in her hands. "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph I promise I will never talk to you again…"

Shepard laughed. "Go, Traynor! We have shit to do!"

"Roger that, Commander," Sam said, taking the opportunity presented to rush for the lift. "Good luck down there!"

Shepard smirked. "You're gonna see the whole thing, Specialist."

"Yes, but at least I don't have to talk to you except for official things." As the doors shut, she yelled out, "Bye!"

_Like a bloody fucking idiot, Sammy. Do us a favor and just shut your damn mouth next time, alright? Jesus._

Sighing, Sam stepped off the lift at the CIC, trying to forget all her social faux-pas of the last twelve hours. Hopefully Eden Prime would provide ample distraction for her…

* * *

><p>Samantha stared open-mouthed at her screen. She'd seen the entire mission, all of the fighting, the endless Cerberus troops, the lifepod that held an <em>actual<em> Prothean, still alive. She'd stared flabbergasted at her screen before a blinking dot on the galaxy map—showing a 3D representation of the settlement with the position of the troops on the ground—caught her attention. She'd interrupted the ground crew's conversation to let them know, and what had followed had been what felt like hours of constant, intense fighting. Sam saw it all. Everything Shepard saw, Samantha saw.

_That's not true. She seemed to understand those videos of static. Something about a Prothean Cipher? What the hell is that? And why is Dr. T'Soni so… nervous when talking directly to Commander Shepard? Aren't they lovers? Or something? You'd think she'd be more comfortable with the commander, not… unsure._

Now Samantha stood at her station, watching as Shepard got off the shuttle, turning around. She saw the shuttle, saw James, Garrus, and Dr. T'Soni exiting it, holding guns on…

{_Javik_,} she heard a deep voice sound in her ear. Shepard had just asked the alien its name. If genders were the same for Protheans, he was male.

{_Javik, I can't begin to understand how earth-shattering this is for you, but you need to understand that you can't just __**touch people and invade their mind without their permission**__._} Shepard spoke to the Prothean, her hands gesturing in front of her. Her voice was… Samantha was sure she heard anger and something else, tightly controlled. A glance down at her vitals showed an elevated heartbeat and rapid breathing. She was...

_Shit, she's scared. The Great Commander Shepard is __**scared**__. What on Earth did he do to her on that shuttle-ride?_ It was clear _something_ had happened, but the camera had been jostled a lot, and Samantha couldn't understand what the Prothean was saying. Nor could she understand Commander Shepard. No one understood her - she and the Prothean had started shouting at each other in a language no one recognized. It was chaotic and unclear, the Prothean grabbing Shepard, causing her to seize before James and Garrus both managed to make the alien let her go, and then they were shouting in that strange language, perplexing everyone.

Now, though, they were finally on the ship; Shepard had calmed down some, but was clearly still incredibly shaken.

The Prothean—Javik—seemed to hold great contempt as he answered her. {_You are weak, Miriam Shepard. You fight the Reapers, but you will not win. I care for nothing that concerns you. You are insignificant, and I will not deign to obey one who is so frightened._}

{_Watch your fucking mouth, Mr. Prothean Man_,} James growled, stepping between them. {_Commander, regs say he needs to be quarantined with an armed escort. With your permission, I'll take him. You should figure out what the hell he did to you before trying to talk to him again, ma'am._}

Shepard started to speak, but a soft blue hand found her hand, and Shepard's helmet camera turned to see Dr. T'Soni, her helmet now off, looking on Shepard with a slight frown. Concern was obvious in her eyes. It was… strange, so have the asari looking at _Sam_ like that, as well. It made the communications specialist's heart pang for Ashley.

{_He is right, Miriam_,} the asari murmured, likely not heard by the others, but picked up by the microphone on the collar of her armor.

Sam heard Shepard sigh, then the camera bobbed. {_Yeah, okay, take him, James. I'll figure out what to do with him later_.}

There were a few moments of silence as Garrus and James escorted the Prothean to the lift. Then Shepard finally took off her helmet, placing it on James's workbench before she disappeared from view. In the distance, Sam saw Steve Cortez, a man she hadn't gotten to know despite having been on the retrofits together, begin his post-flight checks of the shuttle. Shutting out the screen, Samantha prepared to begin her own post-mission checklists.

{_Miriam, what did he do to you?_} Dr. T'Soni's voice sounded in Samantha's ear, vague, like it was being picked up by a mic other than her own. Pulling up the proper screen, Samantha saw that Shepard's mic was still field-active.

_Shit I can hear them! The comms are still active; what do I do?!_

Samantha tried to interject, let her commander know she needed to stop transmitting like she was on the ground, but Shepard answered before Sam could do more than hover her finger over the command.

{_He… melded with me? I think? But it was… forceful. I feel… like he took from me. I don't know what. He forced his way in, took something or maybe saw something, and then yanked himself out. Once he had what he wanted._} A pause, and then, {_I feel like I did after the Prothean beacon_._ Funny that it would happen in the same place._}

The asari's voice sounded aghast. {_A forceful meld… it is the highest, most atrocious violation._} A pause, then, {_Come. We will clean you up, talk in your cabin. If you will permit it, perhaps I can even piece together what he did. Just like I did after the beacons gave you its warning._}

Shepard sniffed slightly, more like she was exhausted than like she'd been crying. {_Yeah, okay. Just… gimme a minute before you meet me up there._}

_Oh thank God that wasn't too bad,_ Sam thought to herself. All she needed to do was wait a minute and then hail Shepard, pretend like she hadn't heard anything and had merely just noticed that the field-comm - which broadcast _all_ communications to the specialist on duty - was still active. No harm, no foul, no more social awkwardness on Sam's part.

{_Hey, Traynor. I left this thing on. I'm sure you heard all of that, didn't you?_}

Samantha's heart sank. _Shit_. "Uh, yes, Commander. I apologize. I tried to interject, but then you were speaking, and I'm far too British to just interrupt like that."

Shepard chuckled. {_Aren't you from a colony, Traynor?_}

"Yes, ma'am. But my parents grew up in London. And it really did feel rude to just interrupt."

{_I can see that. I trust you'll keep it to yourself?_}

Samantha was taken aback. "Of _course_, Commander."

Shepard's voice sounded incredibly tired. {_Alright, good. I'll turn this thing off now. Then I'll only have EDI eavesdropping_.}

Samantha let out a small chuckle. "Roger, ma'am."

The signal quit broadcasting, leaving Samantha alone. With a heavy sigh, she closed all but one screen. Getting to work on her reports, Samantha tried not to think about what was going on with Shepard and that frightening alien who looked remarkably like those god-awful Collectors she had seen on Horizon. _I hope I don't meet him in the halls…_


	18. Chapter 18

_A/N: Yes! I did it! As many of you know, I'm sure, Dragon Age: Inquisition came out TODAY and I'm just awaiting the delivery of mine. As you can imagine, this means not a single Bioware fan will be doing **any** writing for at least a week. Including me. Sorry folks. But I got an update in under the wire! Unfortunately, it is not betad, because I am impatient and because Raven Sinead is not home sick today like I am - she actually has grown-up shit to do._

_So! I hope this works for you for a while. Because this is definitely on temporary hiatus, between DA:I and the fact that work got a lot busier so I can't write there much these days._

* * *

><p><strong>Ashley<strong>

"I simply cannot let you out of this hospital yet, Commander!" Dr. Michele frowned at her. "Your neck was broken barely more than a _week_ ago!"

Ashley furrowed her brows. "But I'm doing okay!"

"You are running around this hospital like you own it, Commander! If I let you leave? You would be running battle simulations on the roofs, conducting space-walks in full battle-armor on the outside of the Wards! With a recently-broken neck!" She paused, raising a perfectly-manicured brow. "You know that I am right."

Ashley frowned for a second before shaking her head with a sigh. "Jesus, woman, you're just like my mother."

"Then I can only imagine she has a great deal more good sense than _you_," the doctor retorted.

Ashley grinned. "Well, she is a nurse and the mother to four crazy girls, and she did it mostly on her own, so…"

The doctor raised her brow once more. "I see. So perhaps not good sense so much as the stamina of a fully-matured krogan male."

Ashley blinked a few times. "I… did you just say my mom has a quad?"

"You can interpret that however you wish, Commander. However, do not distract me – I cannot discharge you for at least another week, likely two. Your face is still a landscape of bruises, you cannot fully turn your head, and you would likely pass out if you were to try a workout in full battle-gear – or if I took you off your pain medications. Besides all that, do not think I have not been speaking with Doctor Chakwas." Ashley let out a groan at this. "I follow _her_ recommendations, and they are that you stay here for at least another two weeks before being released to sleep in the Alliance barracks. And then another few weeks of physical therapy beyond that. Your _neck was broken_, Commander. This is not a simple fix of a 'boo-boo'."

Ashley couldn't help it. She snorted out a laugh at that last line. Shaking her head, she relented. "Alright, alright. Fine. You win. Geez."

The doctor nodded. "You will stay here, and you will get better." She paused, her expression taking on a more sympathetic quality. "You will fight for your home, Commander. My job is to get you well enough to be effective, and not die prematurely. I want you to be able to marry that fiancée of yours, Commander."

Ashley sighed, feeling the fight leave her as she did so. "Yeah. I… I've never sat out of a fight well. Ever. Sorry for being a pain in your ass."

Dr. Michele chuckled. "You are hardly the worst patient I've had, Commander. Remember, you met your quarian friend because of _me_. _That_ invited a whole _mess_ of trouble down on me."

The image of Dr. Michele with a thug's gun pressed to her temple flashed before Ashley's eyes. That was when she'd met Garrus. The turian sharpshooter hadn't hesitated, rounding the corner and planting a bullet between the thug's eyes the moment the oaf had been distracted by Miriam. He'd then coolly dragged the doctor out of harm's way and helped to dispatch the rest of the assholes shaking her down before going back to the doctor and pulling her to her feet, gently insisting she take a seat on her own biobed before she passed the fuck out. It had been Ashley's first real interaction with an alien, and she had been so surprised to find him both clean and efficiant as well as compassionate. She felt dumb for that opinion now – people were complicated, and compartmentalizing was not a strictly-human habit – but at the time it had been a revelation, and she had wanted to see what made the man tic.

Now he was on the _Normandy_. And she was here. Under the care of the doctor that had brought them all together. How strange that it should happen that way.

Ashley was about to respond to the doctor when the terminal in the room began beeping with an incoming call. Ashley looked to the doctor apologetically.

"Saved by the bell, I see," Dr. Michele quipped, heading for the door. "I will leave you alone, Commander. But no more talk of being discharged, even with follow-up care, for at _least_ another ten days. Or the answer will be three _weeks_."

"Damn," Ashley whispered, shaking her head as the doctor left the room. She conveniently ignored the ache in her neck muscles from shaking her head like that, instead getting up and moving to stand in front of the terminal. Answering the call, she grinned broadly to see Sam's face.

"There you are," she said, seeing in the specialist's eyes that she was back to her normal self.

Sam had the good grace to blush. "Yes, I… apologize for last night."

"No need, baby. I'm just glad you're doing better. You scared me, Sam. I… I see your face is still bruised."

"I'm sorry, Ash. I… I wasn't expecting to get hurt. I was just going to check on something, and…" She trailed off, making a frustrated noise. "I can't tell you-"

Ashley held up a hand. "It's okay, babe. Shepard told me what happened. No need to go into details. How are you feeling today?"

Sam sighed, adjusting her neck and shoulders. She was clearly in the Engineering subdeck again. That would probably be one of the few places the specialist would be guaranteed even minor privacy on a crowded ship. She should just get used to it, she supposed. The lighting was bad, though, not showing all the details of Sam's face. It was also suggestive, reminiscent of a bedroom, and it made Ashley's heart ache just a little more to be with her fiancée.

"I'm feeling okay. I probably won't need painkillers tomorrow. I'll just be sore and bruised. Just like a marine, right?" A small smile pulled at her lips.

Ashley chuckled. "Just like a marine. Sam Traynor, Arms Master."

Sam chuckled, shaking her head. "Right. I could absolutely save the day. By cowering in the corner like I did when-"

"Hey," Ashley interrupted, scowling a little. Sam was referencing Horizon. "None of that. You were wonderful. You did what you needed to _despite_ being terrified. I'm glad I could take the shot for you, but I know you woulda been great and done it if you'd had to." She paused until she had Sam's big, brown eyes on her own. "You're not any less important for not being a combat specialist, Sam. Your work, the intel you provide, is _crucial_ to the mission being a success. And you know that; it's one of the first things you told me when you started flirting with me on that shuttle. So what's wrong?"

Sam sighed. "I'm fine, I just… I miss you. I accidentally eavesdropped on Commander Shepard and Doctor T'Soni, and it was so…"

"A hot mess?" Ashley supplied.

Sam smiled. "Something like that. There's obviously something between them, but it's incredibly strained, and it honestly just makes me miss you more. We're just so… uncomplicated. You love me, and you make sure I know it, and I don't have to worry about that. There's none of this awkward body language and not knowing what to say and… are we weird, Ash?"

Ashley wasn't expecting that. "I… what? What do you mean, are we weird?"

"I mean… we've never really had a fight or a disagreement. We just…"

"Fuck a lot?" Ashley said with a grin.

Sam snorted a laugh, shaking her head. "Inappropriate!"

"And true."

Sam sighed, a smile still on her face. "Yes, alright, it's true."

"Very true," Ashley added, still grinning.

"Oh, you poor thing, you haven't had it in more than a _week_," Sam teased. "You must be about ready to explode."

Ashley smirked. "Laugh it up, princess. You're the one who pounces me at the door more often than not. And then there was that time you dragged me into the bathroom at work and-"

"Yes, okay, no more details please! I don't know who might be listening! Besides EDI, who is _always_ listening!" Sam almost shouted, her cheeks growing a little redder than the lighting could explain.

Ashley just continued to smirk, not saying anything else.

After a moment Samantha sighed again. "I… I just miss you, I guess. And watching two people fail so spectacularly at communicating with each other is making me _need_ to communicate with you. I'm craving normalcy, Ash."

Ashley's smirk softened. "Alright, baby. Since I can't be there to fuck you senseless-" Sam snorted a laugh "-let's talk. What's been going on?"

"Well, I can't give you the details, but I might see Timothy tomorrow. I _hope_ I'll see Timothy tomorrow."

Ashley nodded. That meant they were headed to Grissom. Ashley couldn't figure out why, but she wouldn't be able to ask what was going on with this unsecure link. "I hope so, too. Have you gotten ahold of anyone?"

Sam lost her smile, her lips thinning into a line and a crease marring her forehead. "No. It worries me. I think it's just because of the comm buoys being destroyed, but… I worry about my family. And I have _no_ way of finding out about your family – the only communication with Earth is via mobile QEC that aren't being utilized unless there's an emergency. I… I'm sorry I can't find them for you, Ashley."

Ashley shook her head. "I understand, baby. I'm lucky I can talk to _you_, honestly. So many people don't even know how _any_ of their loved ones are doing. So… let's focus on something else. Any shenanigans on the ship?"

"Joker's been leaving me alone, though I suppose it's only been a week. Oh! Actually, I think it's _my _turn to prank him... James and Shepard got into a bit of a brawl. They both had bleeding noses and puckered lips. But they seem to be getting along better now." Sam shook her head. "Honestly, you marines."

"Yeah, that sounds about right," Ashley said with a grin. "Sometimes we just gotta duke it out and then we're good."

Sam rolled her eyes. "Let's see… well, I had a good discussion with Shepard this afternoon. She teased the ever-loving hell out of me, and then I met Garrus Vakarian by running right into him and _he_ dished out the teasing, too!"

"Damn, girl! You can't catch a break, can you?"

Sam laughed. "I guess not! Honestly, I feel I should be given a break – I battled a robot last night and lived to tell the tale!" They both laughed, Sam continuing with a shake of her head. "Honestly, I don't see why Shepard has such a scary reputation. She seems incredibly laid-back to me. Teasing, smiling… she asks people their opinions and really listens."

Ashely nodded. "Yeah, she's alright. But she also has a temper, baby. Just… pray you're not on the receiving end."

Samantha furrowed her brows. "What… can you give me an example?"

Ashley thought for a moment. "Well… she punched a reporter once."

Sam just stared wide-eyed for a moment. "She _what_?!"

Ashley grinned. "Yeah. Liara had just sent her mom's body to go back to Thessia, and this reporter comes in and starts asking Liara if she plans to go back to stripping and dancing and Miriam just calmly steps up and _decks_ her. It was fucking _awesome_. She didn't even give a fuck that the camera was rolling. Just put her arm around Liara's shoulders and led us away, leaving that Al-Jilani woman on the ground."

Sam's eyes were big. "Wow. I never would have thought."

Ashley nodded. "Yeah, she's… a _bit_ protective."

Sam was quiet for a second, giving Ash a look she recognized. "What?" she asked.

"I… can't help but notice that you seem to be a bit more agreeable on the subject of Shepard."

Ashley just blinked for a second. "Uh… yeah, I guess you're right."

"So I suppose that means you had a good chat after I tried to get you to take your clothes off?"

"Heh, yeah, we did. She… I miss her, Sam. I'm tired of being mad, but… I can't just ignore who she worked for."

Samantha sighed. "I know, Ash. You'll… you'll figure it out. But… I need to know something."

"What?"

"Will you be horribly offended if I end up friends with her, too? It's just that she's my commander, and I have to work rather closely with her, and… well, I like her Ash. She seems like a good person. I know why you're angry, but for me… she kept my family from being abducted, and-"

Indignation flared, wounding Ashley's pride. "I… thought _I_ kept you safe…" She felt like a child, but it was out, and it _did_ hurt.

"Oh Ashley that's not what I meant," Sam rushed. "I just meant that she's the one that got the Collectors to leave, and I… am shutting up now. Shit. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I can't quite get it right today, it seems. Keep getting my foot stuck in my mouth."

Ashley sighed. "It's okay. My pride and I will have a chat and I'm sure we'll both get over it. You're right, I couldn't have fought them off myself. Shepard is the one who chased them off the planet. I just… God, it kills me I can't keep you safe, baby."

"Well, get better, and come onto the _Normandy_. I want you back, so I can welcome home the conquering hero again."

And image came to mind, of Sam welcoming her into the specialist's bed on Horizon each night after a full day of hard work directly after the Collector attack. It… it had been what had sealed Ashley's fate. She'd allowed herself to fall in love the rest of the way, their short time together be damned.

"I'm working on it, Sam. Is… is there any chance I'll get some warning when you get here next?"

Sam shook her head. "Not from me, I'm afraid. I can't say anything about where we'll be. Maybe you can check in with Alliance HQ? Maybe you can register us with them while you're at it?"

"Yeah, okay… God, so unromantic. Like going to the damn DMV," Ashley said with a dramatic sigh.

Sam giggled. "I-"

They were interrupted when the door to the room slid open, a nurse appearing through the privacy-screen. "I apologize, Commander Williams, but you have a very important visitor."

Ashley frowned. "No one's more important than the person I'm currently on a vid-call with."

"Oh, Ashley, honestly," Sam started, but was again interrupted.

"I'm sorry, but it is Councilor Udina, Commander."

"Oh. Shit. Um…"

Samantha cleared her throat. "I'll go. Call me later?"

Ashley nodded. "You got it, babe. Hey."

"Yes?"

"I love you."

Samantha smiled, a warm, open thing that only came out around Ashley and Sam's family. "I love you, too. Bye, Ashley."

"Bye."

Taking a deep breath, Ashley turned just in time to see the human Councilor enter the room. "Councilor Udina," she greeted, feeling entirely underdressed. "I apologize I'm not in uniform."

"Please, it is quite alright," he countered, taking the hand she held out. "It is good to see you in one piece."

"What can I do for you, sir?"

"I'll get right to the point, Commander Williams. I have a proposition for you…"

* * *

><p>Ashley walked as if in a daze. She had sat and listened while Udina had proposed she be the second human Spectre. He had said that while Shepard had done her people proud, she was not the ideal Spectre he had hoped she would be. Miriam had a huge black mark on her record – working for Cerberus – and before that had kept screwing the pooch during their chase through the galaxy of Saren. Ashley hadn't been happy to hear that, but at the same time… she couldn't help but think what he had to say made at least <em>some<em> sense.

Then he had thrown out his nuclear weapon.

"_This will be a chance to redeem your family, Lieutenant-Commander. To remove the black mark brought on by your grandfather and to put your name in the history books in a positive light. Think about it, Commander… This would be an excellent way to start your new family."_

He had then walked out, leaving her to ponder his words. After about ten minutes of sitting dumbly staring at the wall – thinking about her father, her grandfather, her childhood spent struggling because her dad couldn't get a raise, how her mother's family hated her father and didn't really want much to do with the kids – she finally left the fucking hospital room. Now she wandered out into the lobby.

It was much less crowded than it had been the first week. _God, what's it been, ten days since the Reapers invaded? Not even? No wonder Dr. Michele is so adamant about keeping me here longer. Reckless, Ash. Dad woulda said so, even._ Shaking her head, she found who she was looking for – and hadn't even known she was looking for until she found him.

"Hey, Thane," she greeted as she got near, getting his attention from staring out the window. He'd told her about a drell's perfect memory, and how it was both a blessing and a curse. She did not envy him that, getting lost in every mistake she'd made. She did that sometimes even _without_ perfect memory. They'd had many conversations over the last several days, building up a guarded trust and friendship. He had continued to ask her about her religion, and her about his, and it had devolved into conversations about family and loss and everything else one might talk about. She was surprised to find they had a lot in common. And she mourned for his losses. He had told her that, more often than not, his memories showed him the horrifying moments, and not the wonderful moments of love and light experienced with his family.

Thane blinked, looking up at her as she came to sit next to him. "Ashley. Hello. I hope you were not calling my name?"

She shook her head. "No. Still haven't snuck up on you," she said with a smile.

Nodding, he hummed. "Good. Then my reflexes have not atrophied too badly."

"How are you feeling today?"

Blinking his strange blink a few times, Thane seemed to assess himself. "I am… alright. My fingers are a bit tingly, but overall I feel better than I have felt the last several days."

"What were you thinking about this time?"

He actually smiled. "My wife, Irakah. I was thinking about… the good times. The intimate moments."

Ashley grinned a little. "Yeah? I'm glad. Nothing like those moments with a beautiful woman who loves you."

"Yes. I… am sorry you are deprived of them with your intended."

Ashley slouched back in her chair. "Yeah, it's the fuckin' pits, but I can't change it. Only thing I can do is get better."

"You seem to be doing alright, all things considered," he pointed out.

Ashley sighed. "I know. But they also still have me on some pretty heavy painkillers, and when you and I are done I'll probably be ready for a nap, so…"

"So you must be patient and let your body rest and heal. It is difficult for those of us who fight, who move constantly."

"You… you fight?" This was news.

He blinked a few times. Was he uncomfortable? What didn't he want to share? "Yes, though I am not in good enough health to fight any longer. I… was an assassin for the Hanar, and after I free-lanced. It is… it is why my wife was killed. I am not proud of the dark things I have added to the world through my contracts. It was not I who ultimately condemned those people to death, but I have accepted that I had some part, thanks to a very good and persistent friend. I pray for forgiveness, and have done what I can to repent. Now I await my death, and hope to see my wife once more across the sea."

Ashley was stunned. "I…"

"I am not looking for your approval or sympathy. I am at peace with it. They are my sins to live with, as the souls you have taken from this world in the line of duty are yours." He wasn't angry as he spoke, merely stating facts.

And he was right. "Okay, I got you. Is… is that why things are so strained with your son?"

He nodded. "I abandoned him to be raised by family. We only became reacquainted in the last 8 months. He is a man now." He looked away. "I will never see him marry or produce children. But he visits daily and we talk. I am content, despite his fussing."

Ashley was quiet for a moment. Talking to Thane always put her life in perspective. She was troubled by Udina's offer, yes, but she was young, her life hopeful. Thane was watching the galaxy crumble and was dying; he could do nothing about it. Ashley merely had to heal and then could go and _do_ something. Hell, she had the opportunity to become a Spectre! With those kind of resources? She could do a whole lot.

"What is troubling you, Ashley?"

Ashley shook herself out of her reverie. Looking over to him, she saw the drell's somber eyes focused intently on her. "I… I just had a weird conversation. With the human Councilor, of all people."

Thane didn't say anything, merely nodded and continued holding her gaze. It had taken her a while to realize it was just how he was. He wasn't staring, he was just looking. Different species had different social cues. Hell, even among humans it changed from culture to culture. So she ignored her discomfort – it felt like he was staring right into her soul – and continued her explanation.

"He wants to make me the next human Spectre. I… don't really know how to feel about it."

"That is an honorable title to hold. One can do much good with it. But Spectres also have a reputation for doing whatever is necessary to get something done, even if innocents must be sacrificed." Blinking, he settled back in his chair. "And you would be loyal to the Council, not your Alliance."

"Well, _in addition_ to the Alliance, which can get sticky," Ashley corrected. Sighing, she slouched further in her chair. "I hate Udina, but… he had some good points. Shepard hasn't exactly been the exemplary human Spectre, and my record is way less stained. And I'd be able to lift my family off the blacklist of doom. I…"

"You know Commander Shepard?" Thane asked, completely derailing Ashley's thoughts.

"I… yeah. I served on the original _Normandy_. I was on Eden Prime when the geth attacked. Why? Do _you_ know her?"

He nodded. "Yes. I served on the _Normandy SR-2_. I was on the Collector base with her." Pausing, he added quietly, "She is the one who helped me reunite with my son, who woke me up from my battle-sleep and made me see that I was not merely a weapon."

To say Ashley was shocked would be a _severe_ understatement. "I… shit. Talk about a fucking coincidence."

"Perhaps it is not a coincidence. Perhaps we were supposed to meet," he said, fixing his gaze on her once more, making her straighten a little in her seat.

"I… you worked with Cerberus, Thane. I can't…"

He blinked. "We used Cerberus resources, but I worked for Commander Shepard. Even the Cerberus members of the crew fled from Cerberus when the ship docked here at the Citadel to be turned over to the Alliance."

Ashley sighed. "I was the one she turned it over to."

Thane just smiled. "Hardly a coincidence, then. We were meant to cross paths."

"I…" Ashley groaned, frustrated. "How do I trust her again? She's not even _remorseful_ that she was with Cerberus!"

"Ashley, she did not have much choice, as far as I understand it. The Alliance wasn't doing enough to save its colonies, and Cerberus was willing to write her a blank check, as I believe the human expression goes. They-"

"The Alliance was doing _plenty_," Ashley huffed defensively. "I was on Horizon. We just didn't know it was the Collectors who were abducting our colonists."

"Ashley… you were _lured_ to Horizon. As was Commander Shepard. As were the Collectors. By the Illusive Man. He is your true enemy. He is the puppeteer."

Frowning, Ashley sat up straight. "What… what do you know? Tell me what happened on that ship, Thane. I… I want to trust my friend again."

He was quiet for a moment. Adjusting his seat, he began to speak. "I was not brought in at the beginning, however, from what I know…"


	19. Chapter 19

**Samantha**

"Specialist Traynor."

Sam turned to see Shepard in full hardsuit - white with blue detailing - stepping off of the lift, helmet tucked under one arm. It was a rather attractive pose, and Sam found herself blushing slightly as the thought occurred to her. She wished she could see Ashley like that.

She also _really_ needed to get laid.

"Yes, Commander?"

"I'm sure you know we'll be at Grissom in about ten minutes."

"Yes, Commander, I'm aware."

Shepard nodded, looking away for a moment before her eyes met Sam's, her gaze intense. "I need you to be real with me, Traynor. Should I relieve you of duty for this mission? I can have Rajad come on duty early, have you finish the second half of his shift later."

Samantha's heart sank. "I… if you think that's best, Commander…"

"I didn't say that's what's best, Traynor," Shepard responded. Samantha's eyes snapped back to Shepard's as the commander continued. "I'm asking _you_: Do you think I should? Can you handle this? I know it's your little brother, and with Mars…"

"I understand, ma'am," Sam said, nodding. "I lost it that day. You can't trust me-"

"That's not what I'm saying, Sam." Shepard's voice was low and gentle, her gaze sympathetic. It was almost unnerving to see in the normally playful and flirty woman, dressed for battle as she was. "I'm asking you what you want. You're easily my best communications officer. Your work is miles ahead of Rajad's, and your initiative outmatches his as well. Halanz is good, too, but she's timid. She hasn't learned when to be proactive. I need you on this mission, with Cerberus here. But only if you think you can do it."

Samantha, her face fully flushing as Shepard listed off her attributes, straightened. "I can do this, ma'am," she said simply. "The outburst with Lieutenant-Commander Williams was an isolated incident. I was ill-prepared for combat and taken by surprise by the day's events. That is no longer true, and will not be true again in the future. I… would like a chance to prove myself, Commander."

Shepard smiled. "And no doubt to help save your baby brother. Be the techie hero."

Samantha couldn't keep the smile from her lips. "That, too, ma'am. I can't let you take all the techie glory." Her face fell, however, as she continued. "I know I can do this, Commander. I… I won't let you down again."

Another sympathetic expression from Shepard. "You haven't let anyone down, Sam."

Samantha didn't know what to say in response, but was saved the need as Shepard nodded, reaching up and pulling her helmet on. "Just keep doing that good work, and we'll save these kids. Oh, and, uh… strap yourself into your safety harness. I asked Joker to use the ship as bait so my team can slip in unnoticed."

"We're… _bait_?"

She couldn't see it, but Samantha knew the commander was grinning behind her helmet. "What? You never been on a ship baiting a bigger ship before?"

Sam shook her head, unable to keep a smile off her face. "No, ma'am, I can't claim that _particular_ achievement on my resumé."

"Well, give it another fifteen minutes, and you _can_," Shepard said, then turned, heading for the lift. "I'll be in touch."

"Right, ma'am."

As the lift opened, the white and blue helmet turned to face her. "Sam?"

"Yes, Commander?"

"What's his name?"

Sam felt warmth spread through her at the question, and she smiled slightly. "His name is Timothy, Commander."

The helmet nodded, and the commander disappeared into the lift. This time, as the doors closed, Sam felt only hope blossoming in her chest, instead of the dread she'd felt as Ashley had disappeared.

* * *

><p>Joker's voice sounded not in her ear but all the way from the cockpit. "Woo-hoo! Got the last one of those sons-a-bitches!"<p>

"Does that mean we can stop swooping around like a bloody jetfighter?" Sam murmured under her breath, taking advantage of the calming of the ship to look at the screen in front of her. Her safety harness, around her shoulders and waist but anchored underneath her console, had kept her from flying when she lost her footing, and the inertial dampeners were working stellarly, keeping the stumbling down to a minimum, but even still she would sport several bruises come the next morning. _Nothing compared to what the ground team is going through_, Sam reminded herself as she took in the scene on the space station through Shepard's helmet camera.

Shepard, Liara, Garrus, James, and EDI's mobile unit had worked their way steadily through the station, taking out Cerberus soldiers as they went. It was bloody work, but the team was efficient, dropping the enemy soldiers without too much fuss and moving on. The chatter was down to a minimum, as they wanted to keep their presence as confusing as possible and Sam had informed Shepard that Cerberus was attempting to hack their communications. Sam had been waging a war against the multiple hacking attempts ever since.

Shepard had the biotic students now, but Timothy was not among them. Sam's heart had nearly fallen right out of her and onto the floor when she'd realized this, but she soldiered on regardless. These were only the biotic students, after all. The students working in the tech program - among which Timothy numbered - were not with the teacher. _Someone named Jack? Shepard and Garrus seem to know her…_

She watched as the door in front of Shepard opened… onto a huge battlezone.

{_Run!_} Shepard shouted. {_Scatter!_}

The camera jostled, the floor coming up to meet Samantha's screen. It took her a moment to realize Shepard had probably taken a running leap, rolling and popping back up behind a pillar. The fighting was furious. There was an atlas off in the distance, sending rockets toward them, the resulting explosions showering the ground team in white-hot twisted metal debris.

{_We need to take down that atlas!_} she heard Shepard shout after the view showed the atlas surrounded in a halo of smoke before ducking back behind the pillar. {_It's gonna blow a fucking hole in the side of this station!_}

{_You and me can take care the foot soldiers_,} Garrus's voice piped in through Sam's radio. {_Let Vega and Liara get in there and take it down! We just need someone to take down these damn external shields!_}

{_I will disable their shielding, if someone can get me close enough_.} It was strange hearing EDI's voice through the radio, knowing she was on the ground _and_ running many of the ship's systems. _I hope she has the processing power for all of that…_

The plan worked, and Samantha watched in awe as James and Liara got close, ravaging their way through the ground troops so EDI could disable the external shield pylons. She then took out the atlas's shields, allowing Garrus and Shepard the opportunity to snipe the pilot of the thing from afar. A well-placed biotic pull had the power unit of the machine in Liara's hands, disallowing anyone else from piloting the thing, effectively disabling it _without_ further explosions.

The last few Cerberus soldiers fell without a hitch after that, Shepard making an incredibly impressive shot through the slit of one of those seemingly-impenetrable metallic shields. Sam had a rather off-putting realization that Ashley could likely do that, too, if she was truly as good as she said she was. It was never a brag when Ashley said it, merely the statement of fact, an ability of hers that might go on her résumé or something like that. Very much like how Samantha was good at strategy games and compiling multiple QEC sources into a single communications network, Ashley could snipe an elusive target from too many meters away for Samantha to even be able to distinguish a still and silent person from the background.

She had no time to linger on it, however. Shepard's team was moving now, heading for the shuttle. They still had not found the missing students from the tech program…

Up ahead on Shepard's screen, she saw a group of students behind some kind of energy barrier. Shepard was already speaking to them. {_Hey, kids, it's okay, we're Alliance, here to help you. We've already got Jack and her biotic students_.}

{_How do we know you're telling the truth? That could be a convenient lie to get us to listen to you_.}

_That voice…_

"Commander?" Samantha said shakily, her heart suddenly pounding a million miles a minute.

{_What is it, Specialist?_}

"The boy who just spoke… that's Timothy."

{_Good. Maybe you can convince him to listen to me, then_._ I'm gonna broadcast your voice, okay?_}

A second later Sam saw the icon letting her know she was on speaker-phone, as it were. "Timothy?" she tried, hoping her voice wasn't too shaky.

The boy, whose features were now recognizable with Shepard's closer proximity to them, straightened, his determined scowl faltering. {_Sammy?_}

She nodded, then realized he couldn't see it, ignoring the tear falling down one cheek. "Yes, Timothy! There's no time to explain, but you can trust Commander Shepard. We're here on the _Normandy_ to help Grissom Academy."

{_I… yeah, okay. I'll… see you on the ship?_}

Shepard answered for her, as the icon disappeared on Sam's console. {_Damn right you will. We just have a little more push left. Go join Jack on the upper level, kids. We'll draw their fire while you guys get on the escape shuttle._}

* * *

><p>Samantha tried not to pace. Her shift was not technically over, and there was plenty of work that needed to be done now they had evacuated those Alliance personnel - <em>kids, they're kids, not personnel. Damn this war<em> - on the station. So she threw herself into it, knowing she would be able to see and speak with Timothy when she was done, when her shift was over and Rajad - _wanker that he is_ - took over her work station. In the meantime, she would simply arrange for their care with Alliance Headquarters.

She was never allowed to finish, however. {_Sam, get down here!_}

Samantha furrowed her brows, looking to see that the team's synced communication was off and Shepard was speaking to her over the ship's internal radio.

"Ma'am?" she answered, not sure what was going on.

{_There's a celebration going on in the mess, and the only person we're missing is you! Get your ass down here!_}

"I… I have work to do, ma'am. They need to go somewhere…"

{_Let EDI do it. She just demonstrated she can be in combat on the ground __**and**__ in the air as the Normandy. She can arrange the transfer of the kids._} There was a pause before Shepard continued, her voice gentler. {_Your brother is asking after you, Sam. You should be here. Captain's orders_.}

Samantha's heart warmed. She could see how Shepard was so charming, so easy for people to fall in love with. She was a badass woman who could take down an atlas with a sniper… and incredibly warm and caring when the situation called for it. And she could take a joke, too. Really, what wasn't to like?

_What did she do that has Dr. T'Soni so reticent?_

"Captain, is it? Did I miss the promotion?"

Shepard's bark of laughter sounded before she answered. {_Laugh it up, Specialist. One day. One day I'll get that __**fucking**__ promotion. Seriously, Spectre and war hero, but they can't make me a damn captain? Technically this isn't even my ship yet - I'm commanding in Anderson's absence. Ugh. Get your ass down here, Samantha, and stop reminding me of my failings. That's an order._}

Samantha smirked. "Aye-aye, ma'am. I'll be down in a moment."

"I will handle the arrangements, Specialist Traynor," EDI intoned, and Sam watched as her console was logged out and shut down without any intervention on her part.

"You know you're kind of scary sometimes, right EDI?"

"I like to occasionally remind the humans of who is _really_ in charge," the AI's voice deadpanned. After a pause, in which Sam merely stared up at the ceiling open-mouthed, EDI qualified her statement with, "That was a joke."

Shaking her head, Sam chose to ignore the creepy AI's attempt at humor and headed for the lift. Her baby brother was alive and well. But she needed to see him in the flesh, just to make sure.

The scene presented to her when she stepped off the lift was pandemonium. Drinks and food had been brought out from God only knew where. She didn't have eyes for any detail but one, however, and she stood at the edge of the room, scanning the crowd of thirty teenagers plus ten or so adults, unable at first to find the dark skin of her brother's face. But then a boy in the corner, speaking with Commander Shepard, turned around, and it was Timothy, and she shouted his name, uncaring that it caused a cessation of background noise in the room.

She ran, and he ran, and then her feet left the ground as her baby brother, anything but a baby, lifted her off her feet in a great bear hug that engulfed her in his familiar scent. He smelled like their father, and like grease and metal and the smell of military-grade laundry detergent, and it was familiar and wonderful and she couldn't help the tears that finally escaped. It had been nearly two weeks since the destruction of Earth, and the toll of being unable to get ahold of her family, or Ashley's, of not feeling her fiancée in her arms or hearing her stupid brothers' voices, of not speaking with her mother about wedding plans or her father about how the family dog was doing, had taken their toll on her psyche and she was only really realizing how much her worry had preoccupied her thoughts in this moment.

"Hey, Sammy," her brother murmured, not shying away from her tears, merely putting her back down and keeping hold of her. "I'm here, I'm okay, nothing happened to me."

She got control of her tears rather quickly, shaking her head and laughing a ridiculous laugh. "Of course nothing happened to you. But I worried regardless." She moved away from him a little, taking in his tall frame, his tousled hair, his cadet's uniform. "You cut a striking figure in that uniform, Tim."

He smiled, moving away fully. The noise in the room started up again, but Sam heard the whispers. Were they related? Was that Tim's girlfriend? What the hell was that all about? She was suddenly embarrassed by the spectacle she'd made.

It didn't last long, however, as Tim asked her the question of the hour. "Have you heard from Mum? Dad or Rich? Is Ashley on the ship?"

Sam sighed, her heart sinking. Shaking her head, she threaded her arm through his. "Let's go somewhere quieter to talk, yeah?"

Worry knitting his eyebrows, he nodded. "Yeah, okay. No one's dead, though?"

"I don't know, Tim. I don't know…"

* * *

><p>"So you're engaged."<p>

Sam nodded, smiling as Tim inspected her hand.

"But you don't have a ring…"

She laughed. "_I_ proposed to _her_. _She_ has a ring. She's… working on getting me one in return."

He nodded. "I suppose that makes sense. When are you going to do it?" He winked, fully aware of the double entendre he'd just made.

Sam just rolled her eyes, taking a sip of the beer she'd found under the bar in the lounge, where they now sat. "That's… kind of a difficult question to answer at the moment. She doesn't even know when she'll be fit for duty and able to return to the ship." _**If**__ she can return to the ship, Sammy. You should think about talking to Shepard about that one at some point._

He nodded again, sipping at his own drink. "I can see that." He paused, looking out the window at the stars. "You think we'll ever see them again?"

Her heart broke at the way he said it. So stoic. Nothing like the emotional little boy who had come running and crying to her when his cat was killed when he was five. This was harder. This was so much harder than if he would just _be sad_, show how much it hurt him to not know if he'd ever see his twin brother, their mother, their father, again.

But no. He had to be bloody _stoic_.

She put a hand on his shoulder. "I don't know, Tim. Communication with the colonies is… nonexistent at the moment. I don't know if we'll ever hear from them."

He just nodded again. "Fuck."

She snorted a laugh. She couldn't help it. But she subdued her laughter quickly, as it actually wasn't that funny. Just…unexpected.

After a few minutes of quiet contemplation, she got up.

"Where are you going?"

"Fancy a game of chess?" she asked.

He smiled. He knew her well enough to know that's how she processed things. A good solid game of chess did wonders for one's mood. At least, it did for Samantha.

"Sure, Sammy. But don't expect me to go easy on you."

She smirked, heading for the door. "As if I _need_ you to."

Retrieving the GUI board she'd bought on the Citadel after seeing Ashley in the hospital, Sam set them up to play at the low table in the middle of the room. It would be a quiet, somber afternoon, but they would be together, and that was what they really needed. She just felt bad she couldn't make something like this happen for Ashley.

* * *

><p><em>AN: Allo! I am back! For now, at least. I have beaten Dragon Age: Inquisition, which is fantastic and I'm obviously going to play it like eight more times. I've even published a one-shot for it - an origin story of my inquisitor. But hopefully this means my brain can now focus on ME again._

_Not a lot to say, I guess. But I am floored - FLOORED! - by all the positive responses to this fic. You all are so kind, and I am so happy you all enjoy this fic and this pairing as much as I do! Cheers!_


	20. Chapter 20

_A/N: Smut-alert._

* * *

><p><strong>Ashley<strong>

"I do not know whose wheels you've been greasing, but I have a writ here to discharge you from twenty-four-hour care to an apartment. Directly from the _Council_."

Ashley looked up as Dr. Michele, who had just walked through the door to her hospital room, came to stand next to her bed. The lieutenant-commander had been lying down and reading, thinking about Udina's offer and her conversation with Thane two days before.

"Wheels? What?"

Dr. Michele raised an eyebrow, handing over the datapad in her hand. Ashley read it, eyes widening. "The Council is housing me in an _apartment_?! Holy shit… I thought the best I'd get would be Alliance barracks that didn't smell like unwashed marines."

"Well, apparently Councilor Udina has taken a special interest in you, and thought you would be more comfortable spending your free time in your own space." The doctor crossed her arms. "Did you put him up to this?"

Ashley looked back up from the datapad. "What? No! He came in here, offered to make me a Spectre, then left! I didn't even say much!"

The doctor sighed. "These politicians think they know better than doctors…"

Ashley scratched the back of her neck. "So… if I go, can someone else use this bed at least? I'd free up space, yeah?"

Dr. Michele gave her a look, one that reminded Ashley of her mother. "If I let you go, will you be here every day for your therapy and check-ups?"

"Scout's honor," Ashely intoned, putting on her best Serious Face.

"Hmmm… Alright, fine. You may go today. But if you are even one minute late you will be checked right back into this hospital and I will not discharge you until you can do a backflip with no medication. Understood, Commander?"

Ashley blinked a few times, processing the threat. "Understood, Doc."

"Very well. Now. You have a visitor, who I imagine can help you move your things into your new quarters."

"Ashley!"

Before she could really see who the opening doors revealed, a very warm and familiar Samantha was practically on top of her in the hospital bed.

"Sammy?!"

She couldn't get much else out as her lips were suddenly covered. That delicious smell of cream enveloped her, hot and sweet; warm, calloused hands caressed her cheeks, her shoulders, her waist; familiar lips molded to her own, causing a thrill to run down her spine. Her own hands traced familiar curves of face, hips, and thighs. She kissed that woman back as hard as she could.

"Jesus, get a room, you two!"

Sam pulled back, breaking the kiss and breathing heavily, washing Ashley in her gorgeously familiar breath. "Sorry," the other woman breathed, her eyes twinkling, letting Ashley know she was _far_ from sorry. Near the door stood Shepard and, miraculously, Timothy.

"Hey Miriam, Tim," Ashley greeted, knowing she wore the biggest shit-eating grin on her face. Her hands tightened on Sam's hips as the communications specialist began to pull away further. "Where you goin'?"

Shepard snorted, moving fully into the room. "Doc said you needed moving. Mind if we help?"

Sighing, Ashley let her head fall back on the pillow, loosening her hands and allowing Samantha to get up. "Sure, why not? Doc won't let me lift more than ten pounds at the moment, and she meant _business_ about me being checked back in if I disobey her orders."

"Well," said Samantha, her voice a small purr. "We can't have _that_, now can we?"

"Gross, Sam, Jesus," her brother said with fake disgust, his eyes twinkling the same as hers.

Ashley snorted. "Like that's the worst you've heard from us."

"I doubt it'll be the worst I'll hear _today_," he quipped with a wink.

Shepard clapped her hands, rubbing her palms together as she looked around the room. "Well, I can see you're all a big happy family. Why don't we get you into this swanky new place and get some pizza or something, yeah?"

Ashley sat up – slowly. She was still on a lot of pain medication, and it tended to make her dizzy if she moved too quickly. "Yeah, okay. Not like I have a whole lot of stuff here."

"Do tell me you at least have shoes?" Samantha asked, looking at Ashley's bare feet before her eyes searched the room.

"I… you know, I don't think I do… Haven't had the need to visit Alliance Requisitions."

Shepard chuckled. "Alright. I'll give them a call, have a delivery made. In the meantime, get some hospital slippers and let's get this show on the road!"

* * *

><p>The door opened on a modest studio apartment. A <em>furnished<em> studio apartment.

Shepard gave a low whistle. "Damn, LC. This place makes my cabin look like a tent out in the woods. Who's dick did you suck to get it?"

"What the hell did I do to deserve _this_?" Ashley agreed quietly, looking around. A large bed was up against one wall, a small kitchen in the corner with a dining table against the wall. A door near the bed opened on a decent-sized bathroom, and in the middle of the large spave was a living and sitting area. Shepard and Timothy moved into the apartment first, setting down her Alliance delivery of requisitions on the bed before going to take in the apartment's best feature with identical low whistles of admiration - a spectacular view of the Presidium through floor-to-ceiling windows along one entire wall.

"This will be… interesting," Samantha murmured, her hand tightening in Ashley's hand.

Ash smirked, pulling the woman suddenly into her arms and kissing her deeply. Pulling back, she kissed the tip of her nose. "I look forward to seeing what kind of trouble we can get up to here," she whispered, letting the blushing specialist go before going to look out the window with Shepard and Timothy.

"So," Shepard said as Timothy wandered off, going to speak with his sister.

Ashley's eyes slid sideways to look at her friend. "What?"

Shepard shrugged, looking back out the window. "I got your email. Udina wants you as a Spectre."

Ashley nodded. "Yeah. I… haven't given him an answer yet."

Shepard nodded. "It's a good thing to give some thought. But it's also a big honor. A Williams, the second human Spectre… would be hard to turn down. But…"

"I'd have to deal with the fucking Council," Ashley finished.

"Yeah. The fucking Council." Shepard paused, staring out the window for a long moment before continuing. "Well, let me know what you decide. I want you back on my ship - only if you want to, of course."

Ashley turned fully to look at her former commander. "I… I'd like to be on your ship, Skipper."

Shepard turned to face her, as well, eyebrows raised. "Really? You wanna work with the Cerberus traitor?"

Ashley shrugged. "I've accepted that you cut ties. Sam speaks highly of working with you. You saved her brother, who is my bro. I… I'm convinced you're _you_. I still need time, but… I think that's enough to start fresh with, don't you?"

Shepard nodded, a small smile pulling at her lips. "I do."

Ashley mirrored her friend's nod, turning back to look at the view. "So… thanks for keeping my fiancée safe."

Shepard snorted. "No problem. Honestly, she's good, Ash. She keeps us well-connected. She's the one who figured out we should go to Grissom. And I know one of the people under her gives her a lot of shit, and she remains professional, doesn't complain to anyone. She works hard, gets all her work done during her shift, and knows _just_ how to flirt with the chain of command without actually bypassing it. And she's fucking _smart_. Makes me look like a troglodyte."

Ashley raised an eyebrow, smirking back at her friend. "You got a crush, Skipper?"

"And what if I do?" Shepard challenged, smirking right back.

Ashley just shook her head and rolled her eyes. "You're fucking hopeless, Skipper." Sobering, she examined her friend's profile. "Have you talked to Liara yet?"

Shepard sighed. "Yeah. We're… tentatively together? She helped me out with a meld after a particularly rough mission I can't go into the details about. On Eden Prime. And it… well, it turned intimate pretty quickly."

"That's good, right? Sex is like the glue that holds us together or some shit, right?"

Shepard shrugged. "It's only been two days since. We don't talk, we just kinda… sleep together, then go do our own thing during the day. I'm honestly still not sure where we stand. I told her about Kelly, and she's not happy, but… I don't know. I don't even know what _I_ want. Why'd I have to fall in love with someone else?"

Ashley shrugged. "Because you have a huge capacity for love, and hardly anyone to throw it at?"

Shepard snorted, shook her head, looked away. "I'm worried about Kelly. If Cerberus finds her, they'll execute her. But I can't ask Liara to look for her. I just have to… _hope_. No news is good news. Or something."

Ashley put a hand on Shepard's arm. "You'll figure it out, Miriam. You and Liara can do what most people can't — you can share your minds with each other _directly_. You should do that more, until you understand each other. Most of us have to do that with _words_."

Nodding, Shepard sighed. "You're right. I'll… I'll try talking to her later. For now, I promised you pizza. And you haven't seen your fiancée in weeks. How about I take Sam's brother with me to get it? We'll even walk, give you a few extra minutes."

"You are a _true_ friend, Skipper," Ashley responded solemnly, "getting my future brother-in-law out of the house so I can fuck his sister."

Shepard laughed out loud at that, shaking her head at Ashley's giant grin. Turning, she addressed Tim. "C'mon, kid. Let's go get that pizza, leave these two alone to catch up."

"Eeeewwww yeah okay," he said, following her out the doors while pantomiming puking.

"So," Sam said, lifting a brow at her as the door slid shut behind Shepard and Timothy.

Ashley smirked, taking a step for her fiancée. "So."

"We have, what… twenty minutes to ourselves? Thirty?"

Ashley closed the distance between them, grabbing Sam by the hips and reeling her in until they were flush against each other. "I really don't think I'm gonna last that long, baby, but I'll try."

Sam laughed, snaking her arms around Ashley's neck in a way that made the lieutenant-commander's heart fall right through her stomach. "Silly girl – you'll be done quickly, and then you'll spend the rest of the time on _me_."

Ashley pouted. "Greedy."

"Oh, just shut up and kiss me, Ashley."

"Yes, ma'am," Ash purred, dipping her face the few inches required to catch Sam's lips in a kiss. Cream and heat and the smell of military-issue soap washed over her, and she groaned her approval. Her hands roamed, pulling Sam's shirt out from the waistband of her fatigues.

"Oh God, Ashley, hurry up. I need to feel you," Sam moaned as the LC's lips found her throat. The needy tone took all of Ashley's remaining restraint from her. With a growl, she lifted Sam's shirt and bra over her head in one move, depositing them unceremoniously on the ground as she piloted the specialist to the closest surface – a couch.

"Yours, too," Sam panted after another searing kiss. "I want your skin."

"God, me, too," Ashley sighed, allowing the distance required for her t-shirt to be removed.

"Oh… yes…" Skin slid along skin like warmed velvet on a cold winter's day. Hitting the couch together, they lay out on it, Ashley quickly beginning to kiss and bite her way down to Sam's beautiful – and bountiful – breasts. Someone somewhere once said "more than a handful is a waste." Well, whoever that had been could kindly suck Ashley's left nut. Sam had way more than a handful, and Ashley couldn't be more delighted to hold them, bury her face in them, kiss and bite and lavish them with attention. If they'd been small she would also love them, by the mere fact that they belonged to Sam. She had _never_ been discerning when it came to tits. All kinds were magnificent to one Ashley Williams.

But Sam's were special. They were, quite simply, Sam's.

"God, Ashley," Sam moaned when the LC's lips closed around a stiff nipple. She laved it with her tongue as her hands searched for the button and zipper to Sam's pants. But something wasn't working quite right…

"Dammit," Ashley murmured, pulling back to see what the problem was.

"You forgot the belt, didn't you?"

Ashley blushed, taking care of the offending accessory with a flick of her wrist. "Shut up, Doofus. You forgot my damn _boots_ the first time."

"Touche – ah!" Sam yelped as Ashley shoved her hands inside the now-open garment, lifting the comms specialist's hips and almost roughly removed them – just the way she knew Sam liked. Pulling her boots off with them, Ashley soon had a gorgeous, splendid, silken-skinned _goddess_ splayed out naked before her.

"Stop drinking me in with your eyes and _do_ something about it, Commander," Sam purred, twisting in a very feminine and flirty way to make herself look even more inviting.

And the use of her rank? _Sploosh._

"Fuck, Sam," she said, hurrying with her own pants. _At least sweats are easy_, she thought to herself.

Samantha just giggled, the laughter turning into a contented sigh as Ashley slid atop her again. Their breaths mingled as they kissed, and for a time they were lost in the feel of skin and tongues and teeth and lips, hands roaming, pinching, squeezing.

Ashley was very much present as she dipped her hand between them, however, quickly finding the bountiful thatch of hair between Samantha's legs. She swallowed Sam's groan as she pressed forward, circling her clit, feeling her own core pulse at the feel of how wet Sam was. Growling possessively, she pushed forward, up, and in, filling this delicious creature in her arms, accepting the woman's pleasured shriek into her mouth.

Sam's tongue quickly followed her cries, plundering Ashley's mouth as the LC filled her up, over and over, finding every spot she had come to know so intimately that she didn't even need to think about it. She just went where the moans, sighs, and digging fingernails told her to go.

No more words were spoken… unless you counted Ashley's name filling the space between them whenever their kiss was broken. Ashley swallowed Sam's cries when she came, her blood boiling, her body spurring her forward, deeper, working Sam and drawing out her orgasm, working her up to a second and drawing that out even longer.

"Oh God, stop, Ashley," Sam panted finally, breaking the seal of their lips, her sweet breath washing over the LC.

Ashley backed off, stilled her fingers, the thumb she had over Sam's clit, relaxing her body so they lay pressed together. Her neck was stiff but she didn't care. Compared to some of their other acrobatics during sex, that had been her taking it easy – Dr. Michele would just have to accept that. Ashley would gladly go to an extra couple of days of physical therapy in order to fuck like rabbits with Samantha.

Sweat gathered at Sam's temples, trickling into her hair. It also gathered on her upper lip, mingling with the taste of her mouth as Ashley pulled them into a languid kiss. Pulling back, she looked into brown eyes so dark they looked black, smiling at her with such love, such adoration, that Ashley was momentarily struck dumb. She just… _looked_, for as long as she could. Fate had very nearly separated them, but here they were, together, affirming their love, their lives. This was important. This was what they were fighting for, what Ashley was healing for.

"Having Earth-shattering realizations without me, Ash?" came Sam's soft, somewhat hoarse voice, her warm breath washing over Ashley with each word.

The lieutenant-commander grinned, the moment leaving with her blessing. "Just… looking. You're so fucking _pretty_."

"Flatterer – _oh_…" Sam cut herself off in a sigh as Ashley gently removed her fingers from Sam's drenched folds. Wiping them quickly on her own stomach, she kissed the woman lying in her arms tenderly, damp fingers caressing her cheek.

The kiss quickly grew heated, however, Ashley's burning need insisting on directing them. Samantha seemed all too willing to follow along, her hands roving, her tongue dancing, her breath taking on that needy quality as she exhaled that always told Ashley that it was _on_.

They rearranged, Samantha sliding on top of her, eyes twinkling as she kissed and sucked her way lower and lower. "Oh, I have _missed_ you, Ashley," she murmured, her eyes taking in the silken, glistening folds of the LC's most intimate area. Ashley's whimpers filled the room as her fiancée dipped her head down to take care of the LC's poor neglected body.

* * *

><p>"I have something for you," Ashley said, pulling her shirt back on. Shepard had messaged her saying she and Tim were on their way back so they better have clothes on.<p>

"Oh?" Samantha was already dressed, in the bathroom trying to fix her mussed hair in the mirror. They had both already brushed their teeth and washed their faces of Ashley's lingering scent.

Ashley went to the opaque bag the hospital had given her to carry the few things she'd acquired while staying there. Literally everything else was issued by the Alliance. She'd had nothing else with her when she was admitted to Huerta. Withdrawing two small packages from the bag, she made her way to the bathroom with one of them, where Sam was wetting her hands so she could smooth out her hair. Dropping to one knee unseen, she held up the box that held the ring she'd special-ordered for Sam. It was simple, white gold to match her own, with a decent-sized emerald in the setting. It had cost a tidy sum, but Ashley had never done anything like pay rent or had to maintain a full wardrobe outside her issued uniform, so she had quite a savings built up.

Sam didn't notice at first. "Ash?" she asked, turning, presumably to see what had happened to Ashley, only to squeal with a jump when she saw a smirking LC on one knee.

"So will you marry me back, then?"

"Oh get up and come here!" Sam exclaimed, hitting Ashley's shoulder as the lieutenant-commander regained her feet. She then held out her hand, and Ashley pulled the ring from its box, sliding it home on Sam's ring finger.

"Another perfect fit," Ashley murmured, wrapping her arms around her fiancée. They kissed deeply, Ashley filling up with all kinds of protective and possessive feelings. Mostly, though, she was relieved, and comfortable, and pleasantly satiated.

"Ashley," Sam murmured, resting her head on Ashley's shoulder. "I love you." Ashley just held her, swaying softly to inaudible music, her head resting against Sam's hair, surrounded by her familiar scent.

After a few moments, however, they pulled apart. "I have something else for you, too."

Sam tilted her head, narrowing her eyes. "What is it?" she asked suspiciously.

Ashley just chuckled. "Nothing terrible, I promise. Here." She took the second small package, handing it over with much less ceremony.

"It's heavy," Sam noted, immediately opening the box to find… "Coconut oil?"

Ashley blushed. "I figured you didn't have any on the ship, and it's not exactly easy to find on the Citadel either. So I ordered you some." She shrugged, feeling a little foolish.

"Oh, Ashley, you beautiful woman," Samantha sighed, pushing herself into the LC's arms once more. "So thoughtful."

Ashley smirked, hugging the short woman to her. "It doesn't hurt that it makes you smell like a damn _cookie_."

The sliding open of the door interrupted them. "She smells like a cookie?" Shepard asked, pizza in-hand. "I've never noticed."

"She uses coconut oil on her hair and face," Tim answered, moving to the table to put down the drinks he carried. "It smells like macaroons whenever she walks by you."

"But I haven't been able to since we left Earth," Sam explained, leaving Ashley's embrace. "Kind of hard to get on a military frigate." Examining the jar, she continued. "My skin has been tight for two weeks straight. It's going to drink up twice as much as normal the first time I use it, probably. My hair even more so."

"Just don't leave it where someone else can use it," Shepard cautioned, setting the boxes down on the table next to the drinks. "Personal property is difficult to keep from becoming public on a ship as small as ours."

Ashley snorted. "Ain't _that_ the truth. C'mon. That shit smells amazing. I've been eating hospital food for two damn weeks. Let's eat."

"_You're_ complaining? _We've_ been eating military rations for two weeks. I think we win," Sam countered, going to seat herself at the table very properly. Ashley smiled goofily at her as she began serving herself, piling slices of pizza onto one of the disposable plates Miriam and Tim had brought back with them.

"Damn, Williams," Shepard murmured, coming to stand beside her. "You got it bad, if you're looking at her like that while she serves _pizza_."

Ashley hit her snickering friend on the shoulder. "Shut it, Miss 'I can't sneeze without catching feelings for every girl who's ever looked at me twice.'"

"Ouch! And I was gonna tell you it looked good on you. But no more. Sappy-ass romantic. Hope the sex was good, at least?"

Ashley grinned, winked, and walked over to the table amid Shepard's guffaw of laughter.

* * *

><p>Later that night, Ashley lay in Samantha's arms. They'd thoroughly ravished each other again, taking their time now that they had it and were not so desperate. Now they simply lay together, stroking each other's skin, breathing each other's scent, and just… <em>being<em> with each other. Sam had cried some tears to have Ashley whole and healthy in her arms, but now even that was done. They had regained some degree of normalcy, and they basked in it.

But the moment didn't last. "Ashley?"

"Hmmm?"

"I know I haven't said anything, because I was just so happy to see you. But I do know _why_ you got this apartment."

Ashley's heart immediately sped up. "I meant to talk to you about it next time you called, but…"

"But you had the time and forethought to email Shepard…"

"How did you...?"

"I screen all her mail, Ashley."

Ashley sighed, rolling off of Sam and propping her head up on her arm. "She's a Spectre. The _first one._ I… wanted her opinion before I talked to you about it."

Sam, mirroring her position now, knit her eyebrows. "Why didn't you want to talk to me about it?"

"It's dangerous, Sam. You just watched… _this_ happen," she said, gesturing to the still-obvious bruising on her own face and neck, "and I didn't want to worry you while I was still debating."

"And are you still debating?" Sam asked after a moment.

"I… I haven't given him an answer yet," Ashley admitted. "I can't decide. But he obviously wanted to up the ante, if he got me an apartment."

"He's treating you like you're already part of them," Sam said.

"What?"

"I looked into it. Spectres are given an apartment for their use when on the Citadel. Few use it, but each is entitled."

"Huh…"

"Ashley, you're already a marine. I doubt I'll be more worried than I already am if you decide to take him up on his offer."

Ashley searched the woman's dark eyes for a moment. "It's different from being a soldier, Sam. I'd be a target. I'd be the second human Spectre _ever_. I… I couldn't ask you to-"

She cut herself off when Sam gently cupped her cheek. "Ashley, I want you to be happy, and to do the things you want to do. Do you want this?"

"I don't know," Ashley answered honestly.

Sam nodded. "Alright. Well, just let me know what you want when you figure it out, deal?"

"Deal," Ashley nodded, smiling. After a moment, the LC cocked her head to the side. "I just had an idea. Unrelated. How long can I keep the apartment?"

"It's… always yours. Until you're not a Spectre anymore, I suppose. Why?"

"You said you weren't sure what was gonna happen to Tim, right?"

"That's right. I'm sure we'll find a place for him, but his program is disbanded for now, and he can't go home like most of the others. And he can't stay with the biotic students - they're training for _battle_."

"What if he stayed with me?"

"With you?" Sam asked, turning over, propping herself up on her elbows.

"Yeah. I have this apartment now. May as well use it. I could take care of him, at least while I'm here. And he's technically an adult, can go or do whatever he wants."

"That's an idea… And you guys are such good friends. I believe the word you both use is 'bro'," Sam said with a smirk.

Ashley winked. "What can I say? I've never had a brother before. It's nice. Just wish we knew what was going on at your house. And with _my_ family..."

"I know, Ash," Sam said softly, moving closer and wrapping an arm around Ashley's bare waist. "I keep looking for them, but I just haven't found anything yet."

Ashley wrapped her arm around Samantha, pulling her into a hug. "I know, baby. Let's… let's just not worry about it for now. I'd rather enjoy this while it lasts. The _Normandy's_ leaving tomorrow, right?"

Sam groaned. "Yes. Stupid diplomats and their stupid need to be on our ship. Why do _we_ have to be the mediators? Ugh."

Ashley smiled. "Well, at least you'll smell nice for them."

"You think I can make them all agree with each other just by smelling like cookies?"

"Sure. Who doesn't like cookies?"

Sam giggled, bringing a smile to Ashley's lips. If she could listen to that laugh for the rest of her life she'd die happy. Knowing they'd get married and do just that, even if they didn't survive this war, was a comforting thought amidst a sea of worry. She held onto it as they fell asleep. It gave her hope, and that was in _short_ supply these days.

* * *

><p><em>ANx2: So I totally ended up writing an Ode To Tits in there. But who doesn't like tits? Even the gay men I know are fascinated._


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